


I Dare you to love me

by LylianSato



Category: Alternative Universe - Fandom, Harley Quinn (Comics), Poison Ivy - Fandom
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Cheating, F/F, F/M, Forbidden Love, Love at First Sight
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-22
Updated: 2016-09-07
Packaged: 2018-05-22 14:48:13
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 15
Words: 51,292
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6083580
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LylianSato/pseuds/LylianSato
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Is Harley's wedding day with Jay, her best friend and lover for so many years. She had espected this day for so long, to be happy ever after with him, but everything changes when she met a gorgeous Redheaded woman in her wedding ceremony.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Looking at you

Harley always has known what happens and comes in her life. What was the job she wanted, where is the department she wanted and who was the one she wanted to be.  Jay always has been that kind of guy that you cannot simple get tired of. He is sweet, funny and the most loyal person Harley has known. He and Harley have been Best friends since they were kids. Their parents have known since University and she and Jay grown up together and eventually, they become a couple. Why not? They’ve known each other practically since forever!. Every time one of them said or did something funny, the other was all ready to follow the mood. When one was tired, the other proposes a movie and go to bed early. They were in a perfect synchrony on thoughts and feelings. So when Jay proposes Harley to marry him, the answer was not a surprise at all.

Today is the wedding day, and Harley couldn’t be happier. She is doing her usual morning routine. Brushing her teethes, eating breakfast, but something is different today. She looks at her wedding dress on the wardrobe and smiles to herself. _It is really happen, isn’t it?_ She is gotta marry the best guy she have ever known in her life and they will be forever at each other side, not like they already haven’t, but the though makes Harley’s heart to made a few beats.

-

There’s a woman that right now, is as busy as Harley and her family should have in this moments. A redheaded and green eyed beauty whose car has been filled whit floral arrangements and bouquets from the little flower shop she is owner.

Today is a busy day. She has been working for this day for weeks since the mother of the bride has hired her for the event of this afternoon. She said that her daughter’s favorite flowers were lilies and wanted them all over the ceremony and reception. It needed to be a surprise and a lovely one, so she had chosen carefully each flower she used and the result was one to be proud of.

She get on the car and drove to the church, wondering if she finished early her work, she could go for some snacks and watch Netflix the rest of the night. _Yes, I have a life. My own one and I like it._

_-_

“Its everything alright sweety?” Harley´s mom calls from the living room where her father and little sister was. Almost immediately, Harley gets out from her room all dressed and ready for the ceremony. Her white halter dress, her blonde hair in a bun and baby blue eyes made a dreamy sight for all of them.

Her Sister smiles at her and approach her, giving her a tight hug. “You look like a Gigant Meringue!” She beams and giggles.

“Oh, really? Thanks then. Alright everybody, we need to go or Jay will get too nervous and start to sweet and stutter. Mom and Lucy, You go first. Dad, you’re going with me.” She commands happily to her family. everybody nods and get hurry to go.

 

_-_

Once she finished to place all the bouquets and arrangements on the church, the readheaded beauty looks across the crowd and sees who seems to be the groom and his friends, so she approach them to give him the _boutoniere_ for his suit.

“Hi. I´m Pamela, the florist. You must be the groom, aren’t you?” She smiles sweetly has the handsome guy turns to face her. He nods happily and smiles back.

“Hi, Pamela. Yes I am. Im Jay, nice to meet you, and he’s Bruce, my best man. ” he gestures to the man next to him who smiles back at her in a very charming way. She only shakes hand whit booth of them and gestures to the Boutonnieres in her hands. “Oh, sorry. Yes, please. Everything looks beautiful” he giggles and let the pretty woman to put him the little flower in his suit and in her friend’s.

Bruce is smirking and looking at Pamela from head to toes, action that she didn’t miss a second. O _h no, here we going again._

“So… you´re a Florist. I don’t know anything about them, but I really know when and where I see beauty. Right now and here, for example.” He smiles seductively and Pamela hold the urge to roll her eyes and just smiles awkwardly at him.

And like if God has hearing her prayers, the moment finished when the mother of the bride and a little girl comes to hug the groom.

“Oh Jay, look at you. You look so handsome!. My daughter is so fortunate to have you in her life and-“ She was interrupted by the little girl at her side, who is demanding for attention and asking all kinds of questions.

“Mommy! What happens when an unstoppable force meets with an immovable object?” and then everybody freezes. _What kind of question was that?_ _Who´s her? Her Physic teacher at university?_

Everybody just look at each other and Jay just shakes his head and smiles. “I have no Idea, Lucy”. The not pleased girl pout and was guided for her mother to the church door, but Pamela intercept them and looks at the little girl.

“That’s impossible. If there is such a thing as an unstoppable force, then there cannot be an immovable object and vice versa. It is logically impossible the existence of these objects in the same universe at the same time. Is a trick question” She explains and everybody, included a wide-eyed girl smiles at her. _Lucky she was a science nerd back there._

“Haha, I like you! Mommy, can she sits next to me in the ceremony... please?” The little girl grins and made a face to her mother who only looks at Pamela with pleaded eyes. _Wait, what?_

-

Harley beams with excitement when the car arrives at the church. The first thing that she notices, besides the loots of people smiling at her, was the large and beautiful bouquets of flowers all over the front and door of the church. Some were a mixture of white Lilies and red roses and vice versa. They are so beautiful and with a strong smell that hit her at the exact moment she leaves the car. _So beautiful._ Her mother should have telled the florist about the lilies, but the roses are the cherry of the cake. _He or she must know exactly how to job!_

She takes her father arm and walk into the church. Has she expected, the most beautiful flowers were there. _I need to thank them letter._

_-_

_What the hell am I doing here!?_

Pam moves back and forward on her sit next to the grinning girl and her mother when she hear the chorus started to play, announcing  that the bride has arrived. Everybody stands up and Pam takes the opportunity to move away and try to get out of there. She needed to check the reception decoration yet. She was walking for a secondary file when her gaze ups to look at the happy bride and her father walking exactly at the same level as her.

In that exact moment, the bride rised her face and baby blue eyes locked with the emerald ones of hers. All she could do was stand there, feeling like a lighting have just enter trought her body.

-

If the theory of relativity is true, that’s the moment when she confirmed it. The time froze and all that Harley could do was staring at the gorgeous woman into the crowd who is looking at her. Green eyes, red head, light skin and tinny freckles on that perfect face. She feels like her heart is ponding so hard that her chest can barely contain it. A liger pull on her arm was enough to bring her back to reality and where she was. Walking to the altar with linked arms with her father. She broke the stare with the mysterious woman and turns to smile at her father and keep walking, not before she looks again where the woman was, only to find anything but that woman.

_WHAT THE HELL…?_

 


	2. The lost ring

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Harley meets the mistery woman she sees in the church and they made an instant clic!

The wedding ceremony was a total success. The beautiful words of love and promises they made became than in a lovely event. Now they gone to the party in an incredible well decorated Garden, following the same theme of the ceremony, but with inverse colors. While in the church, the flowers were white lilies and red roses, the reception is decorated for Red Fire lilies and white roses. It is such a beauty. Everybody laughs and gives their greats to the young couple. Well, not everybody…

Pamela is leaning against the floral frame at the garden entrance taking heavy and slow breaths, trying to calm her erratic heartbeat that has been pounding furiously against her ribcage all the ceremony. _What the hell is wrong with you, Pam? Why did you felt so nervous? You´re a totally mess. She is a stranger for God sake! Oh, and did I mention that is HER WEDDING? Bad Pam, Bad Pam!._

She started to turn around and go. But a little hand take hers and pulls to get her attention. “There you are!, the party is just starting. Dance with me, come on!” Lucy look at her smiling in a way that makes Pam’s heart to melt. _Oh well, she is nice and I really need to clean my mind._

_-_

Watching everybody excited and having fun, Harley decided to take a minute and go for a Drink. She approaches the large table where the drinks are and took a glass and the big spoon, but she stopped at the sight of the drink on the container. It was Red color, and that was enough to bring that woman to her mind again.

 _She has a beautiful red hair._ She shakes her head furiously. Trying to erase the image of that woman and try to get her drink, but it was more difficult that she had thought. _She has incredible green eyes too, and lips… but the strokes of hair that escapes from her ponytail and fall to her face…_

She found herself staring and stirring the drink container, daydreaming, but a sudden laugh, maybe from some child there, make her shudder and she hit her hand with the border of the container, making her ring to fall and sink into the drink, getting lost between fruit and dried flowers on it. _FUCK! Well done Harl, you just get married two hours ago and you already lost your wedding ring for being thinking in a woman that you’re not even sure if was real or not. Did she was just a dream? She haven’t seen her since that moment or before…_ She keep fighting with her mind and trying unsuccessfully to get hey ring when she heard footsteps approaching to the table. _OH FUCK! Shit, shit, shit!_

_-_

Pamela was trying to catch her breath after dancing and laughing with the little and full energized girl. _Yeah, I’m not that young anymore._ “Hey Lucy, I´m going for a drink, okay? Give me a second” She said at the little girl who only nods and keep dancing and beaming. She start walking to the table and her gaze never leave Lucy. She smiles to herself and enjoy watching the scene. _How lovely. I don’t remember having this fun in a long time. At last she could distract me from.._ But her thoughts were cut when she turns her gaze to the table and get faced whit the object of her previous heart beating.

Harley was there standing wide-eyed at the sight she caught when she turned to see whoever were behind her. It was her. The woman she’s seen in the church. _She was real then!_ She saw how the woman, a little taller than her, is standing there open mouthed and staring right at her. Now she can appreciate her better and GOD she is gorgeous!. Her skin is light but a little tanned, has if she has taken sunbaths everyday or something and looks smooth. Her hair is red. A light tone of one, and under the lights and chandeliers create an effect almost surreal. A halo around her that seemed like her hair was on fire. Fire that contrast and make her eyes shine like reflectors straight to her soul. Those eyes that are still staring at her and… _OMG! I´m staring. You stupid! Say something, now!_

“I…Hi..” She smiles weakly and waves her hand at the woman, who seems to get on herself to because she blinks quickly a few times and smiles back at her, showing perfect white teeth. _Could she even be more stunning? I´m gonna die here._

“Hi, umm, we didn’t met yet. I’m Pamela.” She smiles widely and extended her hand to Harley, begging she couldn’t notice her shaking. “I’m the florist” she said has she looks at those baby blue eyes. _Wooh, they´re like crystals._ When the woman took her hand, she instantly felt a rush in her spine. Her hand was smooth and warm.

“I´m Harl, I mean, Harley, yeah… umm Is nice to meet ya Pamela” She beams like an idiot has they shake hands. “You are beauty… _Wait, what?-_ I mean your work!, your work is really beautiful. I like yo-IT! so much… yeah” _THANK YOU BRAIN! The perfect moment to go on a vacation and let me die here._

Watching the blonde mumbling and giggling in front of her makes Pamela to smile wide. She wasn’t sure if it was for the actions of the blonde, or the warm in her hand. _So cute! Look at that eyes and nose and, Is she blushed?, she is cute and warm and… wait, our hands! I’m still holding it! She’s gonna think I’m such a freak!_

Pam separate their hands and place her own in her lap and started rubbing it shyly. “Oh yeah, thanks…” They staring awkwardly at each other for a couple of seconds. “Anyway, I… I just came here for..“ Pam started to walk forward to the table but Harley placed quickly between her and the table. “a drink”. She blinks and Harley smiles sheepishly at her. _Hehe… cute._

Harley beams like an idiot, trying her best to hide her mistake. “Don’t do it” she says between her smile.  She watches the woman arching a perfect eyebrow and a confusing but smiling look in her face.  

“Why?... is that bad?” she ask playfully, smiling at the cute bride.

“No, it just…” She sights in defeat and looked at her with flushed face. “My ring” She admits and turns to the drink container. “My ring fall here and I can’t find it!” She says has she stirs the drink and shows how it get lost between the flowers inside.

“You´re Kidding me. Really? Your wedding ring? Pam grins at her and gets close to watch the problem. She then turn to face her and noticed how close they really are. When Harley turns too, she could see her features. Hey creamy skin, golden hair and blue eyes watching hers and digging into the deepest of her soul. _Oh no, don’t get lost in them, Pam, don’t…_ And then she smiles. Brightly and a deep flush in her face. _OH NO! somebody help me, Mayday, mayday!_

Harley stares shyly at her and then she got worried that the woman could think she was stupid or something and make fun of her. She looks sheepishly at the ground thinking that was such a bad idea.

“Well, there´s only one solution. Cover me” She perked up and tilt her gaze to the woman who started rolling up her sleeves.

“Wha-“any word she was about to form died in her throat when she felt the woman hands in her waist and rotating her. “You´re not really…” and the woman turns her back to her. “Oh, yes you are” She smiles and tried to cover the woman with her dress.

Pam presses her back against her. It was warm and for some reason it make her smile. She then sunk her hand _Okay, arm_ into the container and started searching for the ring. She hear someone approaching them, but Harley places between her and whoever was coming, covering her actions with her body. _Good move, girl._

She finally found the ring and quickly put her arm out of the liquid. Harley was talking politely with a man and she hide behind her back.

Harley’s breath hitched when she felt a wet hand taking hers and bend it behind her back. A second later she felt fingers sliding something cold into her ring finger. _OMG!, she found it!._ She just continued smiling to the man and felt a presence beside her. She watch with the corner of her eye at the woman with a triumphant grin in her face. She started walking forward, passing the man and looking over her shoulder at Harley. She gave her a wink and smile, before starting walking again and disappear into the crowd.

Harley just star there, stunned, pretending to still listening the man in front of her and trying to process what the hell have just happened. _I’m screwed…for sure._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> YEI ! he clic was mutual :D I really enjoy writhing this.
> 
> Well, I hope it's getting interesting here. Maybe it could be a little slow, but a like to think how the reactions they made are.
> 
> Hope you like it and accept comments :D have a good day!


	3. Flower of oportunity

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Three weeks after wedding, Pamela receives a lovely visitant on her Flower shop.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry! I know I haven't upload since several weeks ago, but my work is a little...demanding. Anyway, its vacation time and I already have several chapters done. I hope you like this story :)

It’s been three weeks since the wedding and Harley and Jay just came back from the honey moon. It was lovely and they have plenty of time to spend together and relax, but Jay’s work is too demanding so they needed to come back. During that time, she had told him about how Pamela helped her, and how she couldn’t find her after that night. Yes, she had sneak her a couple of times dancing with Lucy and Bruce, but that was all. He suggested her to, once they come back, she could ask her mother were Pamela’s flower store was.

Last weeks she could get together on her thoughts and feeling that meeting with Pamela was a… pleasant experience, and maybe they could become friends. There’s something about her that makes Harley feel right. It´s Funny, It feels like something is pushing her to know more of her. Keeping that thoughts she decided to visit her parents.

 

 _Today has been a Good day_ – certain redheaded beauty was thinking to herself. She has been very busy the last weeks on her store. So much events and clients here and there. This is the first day she has been able to bee quietly watering the plants on the front of the store. This quiet scenario makes her mind run to other pleasant moments, or people that had been floating on her mind last couple of weeks. - _It’s been three weeks now eh? -_ She remember the woman that met in that wedding. Her wedding, and how she had feeling so confident that time. Sure, Pamela has straight, beauty and has very brilliant brain, but when we’re talking about People, she had a weak point. She can count with her fingers in a hand those people whit who she can truly be herself. No mask, no fake and polite smiles, and just letting go where the situation lead her. Harley, obviously, wasn’t in that fingers. It’s kinda strange. The feeling of disappointment about thinking that she couldn’t be able to see her again.

_That’s stupid! There´s no reason why you should see her again. Maybe she is moving with her husband somewhere far away from here._

It strange her. She had attend too many events in her years has florist. Meet thousands of people and she didn’t even remember their faces. - _Why is different with Harley?_ She lets a deep sight _._

_It would be nice to get to know her. She seems to be a good person. And she was really cute, alright, she was beautiful… and funny, those eyes who locked into hers and seemed to absorb you and keeping you captive from the whole world.  But that doesn’t matter! She’s married for God sake! And if she wasn’t, she probable wasn’t into women anyway. She’s out of your league Pam._

Her thought were interrupted when a nervous man rushed into her store. “I need a flower! Only one. It must be perfect!” He said while looking between different kinds of flowers.

“OK, hum, why exactly do you need it for? “She ask him with and arched eyebrow.

“I need my wife to forgive me. I need a flower that can say everything I couldn’t.” The man look at her hopefully. Pamela just smiles and guide him to some bouquets with different flowers.

“What about red roses?” she asked taking a beautiful and huge rose.

“What do they say?”

 “Love…”

 The man smiled “Love is good”

“…and fidelity.”

Smile off “… No roses, then” and there was an awkward silence and Pamela blinked a few times- _Oh!, so that was for…_

She cleaned her throat and chanced the mood. “Oh!, no, hum, they’re too…predictable. You need something more… unique”.

She moved behind some containers and started to look for other kind of flowers. She has her head hidden into the flowers when se hear the man going outside, maybe looking the flowers outside the shop. At the same time se hear also a light knock at the door. Even when it was open, maybe a client was asking permission to enter.

“I´ll with you in a minute!” she called out the massive flowers to the unseen client.

“Oh, that’s okay. I can wait” Said the new person there.

Pamela froze. A rush run through her body and felt like cold water had just been threw it on her body.  _That voice… No way, I couldn’t be…_

 As fast as humanly possible was, she straightened herself and turned her head to see the blonde woman that stole her thoughts right in front of her, smiling widely, with her hair loosened above her shoulders, a red tank and jeans.

“Hi!...” Pamela breathes happily and Harley’s smile widened in response.

“Hi…” She beamed and stood there, staring at the woman. Her red locks cascading feely on her back and some strokes fell on her face, her green eyes full of joy and digging into her soul.

It definitely was a good idea to ask her mom and Lucy where the flower shop was. It seemed that Lucy and Pamela had become friends since her wedding, so it was easy to find her.

“How have you been?” Pamela asked, still smiling and looking into her blue eyes.

“Good. I… I Just wanted to thank you for what you did… back then” She smiled shyly, trying to sound convincing about her presence there. Truth was that she wanted to meet her again. Something inside her pushed her to come a see her. So that was the only excuse she could find to visit her.

“It´s my pleasure…” Pam breathes with a happy sight and stared at Harley for a few more seconds. _GOD that smile. Is brighter than how I remembered. This is really a good day._

Thanks to a light noise outside she remembered the man she has been helping and shocked lightly her head, she came back to reality. “Sorry, I was…” She pointed to the man outside and Harley locked over her shoulder to the man.

“Oh yeah, sorry, hehe. Go ahead” She giggled and turned, letting Pamela to keep looking for the right flower.

The man enters and points to Harley. “What is your favorite flower?” Harley blinked a few times, processing the sudden question.

“Humm, Lilies. These are Lilies” She affirmed and the man seemed to think about it for a second but descanted the idea.

“What about this one? They heard Pam saying from behind them and they turned to watch her with a tall and slender flower, with orange triangular shape leafs. “Is a bird-of-paradise” she said confidently. This seems to attract the attention of Harley and the man.

“Keep taking” The man demanded and Pamela Smirks.

 _Maybe is time so be a little smug… just a little. Ok, Pam, Let’s Do this!_  

“Name Sterlitzia, in honor of Queen Charlotte, Wife of King George III, They had 15 children. They never passed a moment without the other and…”

While Pam was talking, Harley only could be able to stare at her, mesmerized. _Beauty, kind, brains… Harl, Are you sure she is really a human and not mother earth in her mortal form?_

Suddenly Pamela was cut off by the man’s hand. “Stop talking”, turning and going outside again, searching for a flower and leaving a Pamela with a puzzled expression that only can be read by a “ _REALLY??”_

Harley was still in trance, looking the gorgeous woman. She was so alluring that she lost mind where she was and in with terms. She wonder how it could be if they talk or make fun someday, what kind of likes or dislikes could share. Her Mount open before she could stop herself. “Do you want to go dinner?”

“Sorry?” Pam was caught in low guard. She was still mind punching the man that she didn’t hear exactly what Harley had said. The only word she caught was Dinner.

The confused face of the redheaded made Harley realize what she just had said.

 _Did I Just_ … _Really?_ _What the hell is wrong with you?!!_

 “Oh, Dinner. I mean, would you like to Dinner with… - _Don´t say with me, don’t say it -_ … Jay and me?” _Yeah, of course. Jay._

Pamela just stared at her. Blank expression. _Did she just invited me to dinner with her?, yeah, with her husband too but… Dinner in her house? WITH HER?_

She must been silent for long time because Harley started chewing her lower lip and play with her fingers while she lowers her head. “I- I mean…y-you don’t have to if you don’t want to. I Just th-“

“I’d love to” Pam smiles at her and Harley instantly raised her head wide eyed, not believing she had accepted.

“Really?!... hum maybe, this Friday?” she asked hopefully, not masking her excitement.

“Friday is perfect” Pamela assured her and the grin that Harley showed her, was the brightest she had ever seen. Like a child visiting Disneyworld for the first time.

“Great! I.. I’ll write you the direction” She takes some post its from the counter, missing the exited grin in Pamela’s face.

 

At the end of the day, Harley walks home with a goofy smile on her lips and her heart almost flying away in excitement; Pamela ends with a dinner date with a lovely couple, a new female friend and a nervous client who ended buying a mini cactus.


	4. The dinner date

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Is the Dinner date night, and some people learns about new friends and makes plans to get them together.

Harley and Jay’s apartment is on top of a tall building, with and incredible view of the city and a rooftop well decorated.

Harley had just finished to clean up the house and started to get ready for this night.

She had told Jay about the dinner and how she really would like to know Pamela better. She told him how she felt about her (well, not EXACTLY how she made her feel), but how she feel as she had known her before. How strange is that, just meeting someone and feel that is your friend already.

Jay was more than happy with become friends with her. He had found the woman very nice and liked the idea of her wife being so excited about a new friend. Harley could be very funny and sweet, and even sociable with most of people in a polite way, but she’s not so open whit others, to the point to have enough trust to ask them out or go on activities together. It is such an action that was reserved only for their family and him. So, thinking about a new friend that could become close to her, makes him very happy.

He was so excited to the idea that even proposed her to invite Bruce too, since the two had known each other and even Bruce had said that he found the woman interesting. Harley accepted the idea with gusto. Even when she had the idea of knowing Pamela for her own, the possibility of a future couple between Pamela and Bruce means that they could meet more frequently, since Bruce is Jay’s best friend, and maybe Pamela would like to be hers.

With that thought, the couple decide to play cupid with her friends and try to make this dinner the perfect opportunity to bond them.

When Jay enter to the apartment, Harley was stepping out the bathroom with a tower on her head and other wrapped around her body.

“Hey sweetie” he said while peeking Harley on the cheek. It was a sweet gesture. Even when they were a couple and had got married, they never leave these best friends attitude. After all, they had been all their lives.

“Hey yourself. How was work? It worthy the long face?” Harley said playfully watching how her husband remove lazily each of his clothes, showing how tired he must feel.

Jay works in his father company, a consulting agency and had a very high position, but is not exactly his dream work. It’s assumed that someday he could lead the company on his father absence, but even when he is very good on it, he would have preferred a not so demanding work.

“Well, if this long face means that I would be able to come home and enjoy the night without annoying midnight calls… Yeah, it worth it!” Said smiling. He always works so hard and is very responsible and accurate with business and meetings with clients. He could be confident and organized, but at the same time kind and friendly with every person he meet. No bothering if he‘s stressed, he always had a smile on his face.

“Good. Remember this is a special night! I bet they would match perfectly. I mean, look at Bruce!. He’s a sweetheart and a gentleman. Yeah, he is like Mr. ‘No only one woman’ but, people could change, couldn’t they?” She said has searching and try different outfits and Jay stepped into the shower, but they continued to speak through the opened bathroom door.

“I don’t know Harl. You know Bruce could be…special in woman kinds so, don’t get upset if it didn’t work. Besides, we don´t know is Pamela would be interested.”

“How could it not work? I mean, you met Pamela…” She took a moment to remember the redheaded woman and pictured her face in mind. “She´s kind, funny, dedicated to her work and… well… she’s beautiful and very smart too! I didn´t think that could be even possible. She’s like the whole package!” She started to wonder what would happen if they don’t match. - _What if Bruce doesn’t really like her_? _I will punch him if he started acting like an idiot and makes Pamela uncomfortable.-_   In the worse scenario, Harl wonder if this ends in a disaster, Would Pamela still wanted to be friends with them?...with her? _She seems to be a very good person. No, I know she’s a good person. If she wasn’t, why did she helped me when she hasn’t even known me? That’s what a kind person do for others, isn’t it?_

While she was debating in her mind, Jay had already stepping out the bathroom full dressed.

“Don´t get it to heart. She’s nice and we have to do our best job. If it doesn’t work, I knew we could still be good friends” He said, as if reading Harley´s mind and give her a sweet kiss on her forehead. She smiles at the gesture. He always has been able read her perfectly. “Anyway, I need to make dinner and it need to be awesome!” He said proudly and makes a superhero pose. She just giggles and hit lightly his arm.

“Go for it, tiger”

 

-

 

There’s a ring on the door and Harley´s heart stops and made a big skip. _She’s here! OMG, She really came!._ She heard how Jay opened the door and greets the new person in their house. _Is she really here or someone else..?_  

“ _Hey there! You look fabulous_!” She hear jay said and Harley’s mind started to run between different pictures of how that person could look like. _“Hi!, Thanks, It’s so good to see you again”_ And there it was. The voice she wanted to hear the most and makes her sure that was Pamela who has come right now.   _OK Harl, play it cool. She’s your new friend and you need to keep her with you._

 

“Oh, I bring these…” Pamela said and shows a huge bouquet of Fire lilies and brings them to Jay. She had expected Harley to open the door when she entered, but Jay seems a nice guy, so it was OK. She wanted to become friends with the couple, even when in the back of her mind she knew that her first though was get close to Harley, but she quickly discarded that. _They are nice people, I could never get between them. It doesn´t meter if I found her so… charming. I’ll respect that and I hope the flowers could speak better than I ever could._

“How lovely, thank you!. They’re Harley’s favs. She’s gonna love them.” At that time, the blonde woman had emerged from the rooms to the front door and next to her husband, who pun an arm around her waist while Harley stared at Pamela with exited eyes.

“Hi!” Beams Harley looking carefully at the other woman. She was wearing a green tank top with black leggings and Jacket. Her red hair cascading on her back.

“Hey there” Pam smiles sweetly and got lost in the sight in front of her. Harley was wearing a white long blouse with a red flannel and black jeans. Her blonde hair is loosen and natural makeup in her face. The red lipstick was se cherry on top, making her pale skin and blue eyes shine like lighthouses in the nights. 

They stared at each other for a while until Jay speaks and the two girls came back to the reality.

“It’s so good you could came. Harl and me were very excited to have this dinner” He said with a bright smile.

“Yeah, me too. Thank you for invite me” Pam eyed the couple and smiles. _they look so happy with the other…_

“Come on, look the living room. We bought a new couch!” Harley beams, and started to move toward the apartment. It was small and warm. Some rustic, with wood tables and a brick wall. In the middle of the room was a large red loveseat.

“It’s wonderful and I have to say: I love the couch” she points to the furniture and smiles.

“You must say our EXPENSIVE couch. Harl was so serious about get it and she didn’t care how much she had to spend on it. Once something caught her eyes, there’s no human power that made her turn away” Jay jokes and nudged with the elbow at Harley, who only giggles and shrugged her shoulders.

“Well, you can’t put price on comfy” Pamela smirks arching an eyebrow at the couple and moving her hand along the furniture.

“See? A woman who understand me” She pokes jay on the arm and smiles at Pam sweetly. The mood seemed so liger between the three of them.

“Pamela.” Jay called her suddenly and the redhead look at him with a smile. “Do you believe in reincarnation? Cause Harley said that she feels like she had known you before” Jay said teasing. Smiling and face toward Pamela, but making eye contact with Harley.

Harley Froze. She knows why he is doing that. The annoying and funny best friend inside of him is still trying to tease her and shame her in front of people he knows is making her nervous. That could be funny if it wasn’t for the puzzled expression in Pamela’s face. _WHUTAF…_

“I… I mean, that’s not…” _That’s it. I’m gonna die here. You fucked up this Harley. She’s gonna think you are a freak._ Her face was has red has her flannel and the heat in her cheeks almost burnt the whole house. She was about to pass out when Pamela spoke finally.

“I would remember her… for sure” Pam said staring straight to Harley’s eyes. She was not sure if it was the right thing to say, but watching the sight of relief in her face seemed to be the best response. Her cheeks are still red, but her eyes seemed to be filled with something between joy, confusion   and something she can’t put a finger on.   _Is not just me then…?_

“That’s good then! Well I need to put these in water so-“Jay was about to leave to the kitchen when Harley took the flowers in her hands and hide her face on them.

“I’ll do it!” She squeals and rush into the kitchen. She obviously couldn’t take to be there as embarrassed as she was.

They look at each other and laugh at the blonde actions. They pop on the couch and started talking.

 

After several moments, Jay and Pamela had been talking about their jobs and lives while Harley was busy in the kitchen.

“That’s awesome! No offence, but I never thought a florist could have a PhD in botanic degree. You´re really into this, aren’t you?”

Pam laughs “Yeah, I’m totally into this. I remember my mom teaching me how to take care of plants and what they mean. Or dream was to have a flowery shop on the city and live between green for the rest of our lives. But, with the time, I get carried by my PhD and I focused too much in my work. I lived in Boston for some years, working for the university. We forgot that dream and moved on our lives.” She takes a deep breath, remembering her old days. “One day, I received a call from my mom. She was really sick and I decided to came and stay with her again, so she would be alone. She died one month later.” She closes her eyes and let out a deep sight. It always so hard remembering that, but being with this people seems to be so right.

Jay puts a hand on her shoulder and give her a light squeeze. “I’m Sorry. It must be so hard” He gave her a weak smile, and that supportive gesture made Pam smile.

“Yeah, it was. Anyway, some days after she passed away I saw this place in downtown. A small corner and I feel in love with it. It was perfect for our dream. So I left my job and moved her to start with the flowery and here I am. Living in green just as mom and I wanted. Yeah, sometimes I need to travel to my old place to help on some patents and studies I’m part of, but I enjoy every moment I spent here.” She finished with a warm smile that Jay mirrored. It is nice, to be around people so kind.

“Wow. It was really an Adventure of lifetime. I’d love to travel to the world and meet different cultures. It was always a dream I have since I was a child but, you know… Harl, responsibilities, family, life… Harl.” The last word he smiles, but it wasn’t has the lovely ones they had before. It was a nostalgic, almost sad one. Pamela assumed there was something too personal behind it, so she only nods and smiles at him.

He seemed to sense the situation and shakes his head and smiles at her again. “Anyway…” he turned on his seat so he was facing her completely. “what about you? Are you married… or have been or gonna be…? He asked with an expecting face. He remember the plan for tonight. Maybe if she isn’t seeing anyone at this moment, she could get interested on his friend, and it that happens, he prays God that Bruce could start a serious relationship. Pam is nice, kind and smart! This is the perfect girl for Bruce.

Pamela just smiles, and moves her head to the sides, making a face like she was thinking in possibilities. “Humm, I’m not really into that. Maybe the laws had changed but…” and she shrugged her shoulders.

 _Change?_ “Sorry?” Jay blinks a couple of times, confused.

“I’m gay” Pam said simply. It’s not like she wanted to hide it. Being honest is something she always has been and was completely fine with her sexuality. _I hope this isn’t going to be a problem. I really would love to have them has friends._

“Oh.” Jay said simply and giggle. A second later, the realization hit him “Ohhh… Got it” He exclaimed with a surprised look. _Oh shit_ He stared wide eyed, knowing that their plan is now throwing away for the window. “Well done. Y-you really are… unpredictable” he said awkwardly and giggle trying to think what the hell he can do before…

There’s a ring in the door and Harley goes to open. “Going!”

Pam turned to see Harley and back to Jay, who had a pale and poker face. “It must be Bruce…” he mumbled but Pamela could her him. She looked at him with an arched eyebrow and a light smirk.

“So, Bruce is coming…” She half asked, half assumed, letting him know that she had catched the plan.

He just smiled sheepishly and Shrugged his shoulders, looking at her like saying ‘Sorry…’. She just shocked her head and smiles. _Oh boy, this is going to be a long night._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi there.   
> Thank you so much for your Kudos and comments. I wrote the whole dinner night thing and resulted to be very long, so I decided to make parts. I'll be update it in a few hours maybe, and get this night to the right point. 
> 
> Thank you for read it, see ya guys :)


	5. The dinner date: part 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> On dinner, Harley tried to bond Bruce with Pamela, but something gets difficult about their different kinds of minds.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I KNOW, I KNOW! It's later than I have promised, but the chapter is longer too!. Work won't leave me enough time!! But dont worry, I will try to upload at last once a week. Hope you like this chapter! Things get interesting and there's going to be more! Thanks for Kudos! :D

Chapter 5

 

The night was warm. Even when the goal of the dinner date was to make Bruce and Pamela a future couple, it ends making the girls closer to each other. The most moments they share, the most they found themselves allured by the other girl charm. Bruce only was getting funny with her friend, making jokes about how terrible Jay’s Dinner was. It was in fact, but the gesture of made it was what it worth.

 When Bruce started making compliments in Pamela, Harley could felt a tug in her chest, but she decided to ignore it and to second every one of them, making the redheaded smile. _I know_   _t_ _hey should be the ones that needed to talk, but…_

 After several hours, the four of them were chatting.

“So, how is the married life? Because every married woman I´ve slept with said it sucks!” Bruce ask the couple while they laughs. Pam was finishing her wine and she rested her elbows on the table while lowering her head. _This guy…_

 “Well, Get married and find it yourself” Harley said smirking and playing with her wine glass. She travel her gaze between Bruce, who was sit beside her, and Pamela, who was across her.

 “OH please, we all know that Marriage is totally out of Bruce language” Jay said and Harley look confused at him. _What are you doing? This is when you say nice things about him, not something like that!_

 “What can I say? I’m not exactly a man of compromise. I like to date every beautiful woman I met” He defended himself and finished proudly his wine.

 “Well, there ARE beautiful women here…” She took a sip of her wine while her gaze traveled to Pam and smiled.

 Pamela stared right at her. _Did she just…? Oh girl, I know where you are going._ She arched a perfect eyebrow and smirked at her with a ‘really?’ glare. At this Harley almost trough off her wine and quickly broke the stare with her. Pam didn’t miss the light blush on her cheeks. _Hehe… cute._

 Jay cleaned her throat processing what Harley had said. “Actually, honey, I don’t think Pamela wh-” He was cutted off by Bruce laugh.

 “There's so many women in world. How could I be with only one for the rest of my life?” Bruce ask playfully. He certainly wasn’t the most “in touch with his feelings” guy, so he didn’t pay attention to relationships.

 “Well, you’ll know it when you find your only one” She insisted. There’s always someone right for everybody.

 “Yeah? And how am I supposed to know she’s the ‘only one’ you are talking about?”

 “Well…” harley takes a moment to think how to describe the feeling of being with the love of your life. “You feel… warm, secure...comfortable, cared…” Jay just stared at her, listening the words she used, knowing that’s how she feels about him. “Maybe you wouldn’t know immediately what it is, but… at the time…” She takes jay’s hand and gave him a squeeze. “ You’ll say: ‘yeah, it was love. It should be” And she smiled sweetly at him while he squeezes back.

 “I agree with you” He said with a smile, while Bruce just shrugged his shoulders like saying ‘If you say so’.

 “Humm I don’t really think so…” Pamela suddenly said and everybody turned with curiosity to face her. Harley had a confused look and stared directly at her while Pamela did the same, staring at her eyes. “I don’t think it take you so long  to figured out. I think you know immediately” her face relaxes, and her eyes get filled with such warm and hopeful but still so confident in her words. “As soon as your eyes… meet each other. When you just want to make them smile, no matter what, and you can’t even think clear near them because there’s no need to,  and then everything that happens from then just proves that you have been right. When you suddenly realize that you were incomplete and now you’re whole.”

 She stare at Harley and the intensity of her glare traped her. She couldn’t look away of those peridots that showed such power behind them, paring her words and leaving her just there staring in awe. She couldn’t form a single word. Her brain has collapsed and just Pamela’s words wander inside. _As soon as your eyes meet..._

 Pamela stare for a little more before turning to smile at the others, who had a surprised look on their faces. “Actually, I have to agree with you. That was awesome.” Jay said with a bright smile and Bruce nodded, not so sceptical about the point of view. Harley was still in silence, just staying there and watching Pamela. Even when the power of her glare had eased, the confidence is still there.

 “Well, is time for dessert. Pam, do you like Brownies with Ice cream?” Jay ask while standing and walking to the freeze. Pam was about to answer but Harley interrupt her.

 “No…” She said firmly and staring at her. Everybody blinks and Pamela arched an eyebrow with a confused face.

 “No? How could you know if-” Harley's face seemed to be filled with anger or something that shows that she was upset.

 “No! If… if you think that about love…”She hesitated about what is going to say.” About how true love feels like, then you’re saying that everyone that don't have that are incomplete and what they had is fake!” Harley yells with frowned eyebrows. She always had know exactly how she feel and what that means. She know how love feels and someone saying her that that is not how it feels, pissed her off. She had feel that too… the kind of feelings Pam had descrive, but  she can’t put a finger on what it really is. She she refuses to accept that she doesn't know her own feelings.

 “That.. I Didn’t say that, I just think that-”

 “Well, I think that was exactly what you wanted to say” She snapped and the confused and maybe hurt face of pamela made her wince. _Shit… what have I done?_

 “She said it more kindly” Bruce said simply, standing to help jay and handing the dessert to both women. They just eyed each other before starting to eat the dessert. Bruce changed the subject by joking about how glad he was about that Jay hadn’t made the dessert too. They laugh and the mood lingered a bit.

 Harley found herself embarrassed and her attention was on the dessert or nod to what the boys are saying but not daring to look at Pamela, who smiled and talked with the guys stealing looks at Harley at times.

 On the same time, both women had the same thought on her minds:

  _I totally fucked this…_

 

__________

  _What the hell was I thinking?_

 Pam stayed sit on the rooftop with an umbrella. After that akward moment it had started to rain so she asked where she can use her cellphone. She needed to ask a friend to take care of the plants outside the flower shop. She came upstairs and once she finished her call she stayed in the rooftop for a moment, thinking in everything that had just happened.

  _Why did I have to say that? Yeah, that’s how I think and… how I really feel. I’ve been attracted for this woman from the moment I saw her… we saw each other. I hoped that it wasn’t just me, ‘cause she said she feel that...connection about me, but… maybe I read it wrong. Maybe she didn’t feel the same and she is just being nice._

 She took a defeated long sight and stared at the city lights. Even when it’s chilly outside for the raining and she had removed her jacket when they were eating, the moment  there was calm and comfortable.

_It's better this way. If she finds a friend on me, then that’s what I gonna be. I hope she still wanted to. Even if she would have that… feelings too, She’s married and I couldn’t do that to them. They’re too kind. I would have love to meet her sooner, maybe I could have…-_

 “What are you doing?!” She hear a playfully yell and laugh coming from the large glass door to the rooftop and when she turned her head she saw a smiling Harley standing at the door frame. The rain is making difficult to hear her, but she was sure the woman was giggling. She smiles back and turns her head back to the view, gesturing to all the place, before returning to see Harley.

 “It’s Gorgeous!” She exclaims, making sure the woman can hear her and the response was that Harley’s smiles turned into a huge grin on her face.

 The Pamela’s smiling profile, with the city lights on background and the tiny drops of water on her face, made Harley’s heart skips. _You are gorgeous…_

 Her heart was beating hard against her ribcage while Pamela looked at her with piercing green eyes. Shining in the night and making her so alluring that all she could do was smile and stare back. Blue and green met for a long moment. No words needed, just enjoying the company of the other. It make them feel warm and comfy. So right and pure. So… whole.

 A lighting was enough to make the two women to break their spelling and started to laugh.

“Come on! Is starting to freeze here!” She calls for her and Pamela jump down the border she was sit and walked to her.

 The movement of her hair with the wind, the way she embraced herself trying to protect herself from cold and the natural swing of her hips while she walks. All that sights had Harley’s heart pounding even harder into her chest. It feels like she can barely contain it.

  _Oh God… I think… I have a crush on this woman... Is this how it feels like, right?_

 She didn’t remember have feeling like this before, but her family and friends always describe it with something like this. She have a crush… a strong attraction for Pamela. But it is normal, isn’t it? Having a crush on your friend, because is something platonic.

 She came back from reality when Pamela enter to the room and gestures that she could close the window.

_She is really awesome, but i doubt she could think on me in that way. She is just… being nice and friendly with us._

 “The view is awesome” Pamela break the silence. They’re standing at the large window staring at the night light and rain. It feels so quiet and a little cold for the weather.

 “Yes it is… that was one of the things that made me decide for this place. Jay never ups here. He said that your inner fear will make you jump” She giggles remembering his fear to highs. He has many fears, but this is one of the worst. She was very impressed that he had agreed to buy this place, knowing that he could never came up stairs. He tried to encourage his fears, something that she could never do.

 “Well, is a good thing having no fears, isn’t it?” She turns to face Pamela who was smirking at the window. So confident. It makes her believe in her words. There’s no fears in her, and if it could have one, she will get over them. She seems so proud of herself, her life. She had heard just a little about her life, when she was talking with Jay, about that even when she’s a Doctor,she came here following a dream. She couldn’t hear more because she was too focused in the flowers she had bought. _What could they have talked about?_

 She only smirks at the words and understand how wise she should be. That's when she reminds the moment before, at dinner. She had expressed her taught, based on life experiences and she was so angry because she didn’t thinked the same way. She even yelled at her… It wasn't because her words exactly, but for the way it affected her. Knowing that there are feelings inside her that she doesn't understand scared her… not knowing what’s going on with her. But Pamela didn't know that and maybe she made her feel very uncomfortable.

 After several moments, it was Harley´s time to break the silence. “Sorry about dinner…” her face fell. She feel so guilty and she didn't want to loose this new friend and new… feelings that she brings on her.

 Pamela Just Smiles and nodded her head to the sides, like she was thinking on something.

“Well.. I’ve had worses…” She said with a chuckleand Harley just smiles, knowing that she referred to the jokes about Jay’s food.

  _Wise… and kind._

 “ I get carried away… I didn’t mean to yell at you” She allowed her to finally face Pamela, and what she found was a smiling Pamela, looking at her with sweet eyes.

 “It’s alright Harls. Don’t take it to heart, really.” She assured her and Harley’s heart melts at the use of the pet name. It hears so good and right on her voice… her lips. And the smile on her face showed her that she really mean it. It made her heart feel so warm again.

 Pamela found herself lost in those blue eyes again. The night lights and the cold weather  made Harley’s pale face to glow. And with those blue eyes, the bluest she had ever seen, shined so bright… This woman makes her stomach flips and her heartbeat increases. _GOD, this woman would be the dead of me… it could be so perfect if she would be into me...and single._

 The thought made her shiver and harley takes this as she had chills and, without thinking, her hands reached the sides of Pamela’s arms and rubbed them, feeling her cold skin against her warm hands, and giving her a light squeeze.

 “Look at you… you will catch a cold being like this” She gave Pamela a worried look, but the woman shacked her head.

 “Oh, I’m fine, don’t worry” She watched how Harley’s hands leaved her arms, missing already the warm sensation, and the blonde started to remove her own flannel. “That’s not... I’m fine, really!” She tried unsuccessfully to stop her but her arms were already around her shoulders, covering her with the flannel above them.

“Nu-hu, I don’t want you to get sick if I can do something to help it” She giggles seeing how Pamela rolled her eyes.

 “Now YOU gonna have cold and get sick!” She gave her a sheepish look and a lopsided smile. Harley laugh and closes her flannel above Pamela’s chest and leave her hands there, keeping closed the flannel. Pam giggled and rested her hands on Harley’s elbows.

 Their faces are close. They could feel and smell the others breath; mint and cherry melting in the space between them. Pamela swallowed hard, noticing how Harley’s cheeks turned a little red.

 They stared at each other. Harley could see the tiny freckles on Pamela’s face. Above her nose, her cheekbones and the sides of her forehead. Her heart was pounding in her ears. They are so close and this moment feels so light. The proximity and the warm that emanes of Pamela’s body clouded her mind. She forgot where she was and which people are around. There were just she and her, beaming like a pair of idiots. She just feels so happy without reason. _There’s a reason..._

 She tugs at the collar of her flannel, trying to close even more the clothe and Pam snorts at the action. She giggled and tilted forward, almost touching their foreheads.

 “What are you two doing?” Both women jolted and parted away instantly, looking downstairs with wide shocked eyes. _OH SHIT_

 Jayy’s head was popped  downstairs smiling at the pair. He had heard them laugh and came to watch them, but as always he didn't go upstairs.

 “Nothing!” Harley shoot too quickly and the nervously on her voice was evident. She never expected Jay so suddenly. If he would have walked up, he could have find them…

_Wait.. find us how?. We were just… flirting? OMG! Was that flirting? NO, no it couldn’t. Get it together Harl, we were just having fun and being nice and… and Pam… oh come on! She couldn't even flirt with me, could she? She is just wonderful, and nice and… straight. Right?_

 The panicked look on Harley’s face made Pamela sigh in defeat. _Right…_ “The view is gorgeous here. You would love it” She tried to sound as natural as possible and noticed how Harley’s shoulders relaxed and sigh in relief.

 “Yeah, I believe you” he giggled and the pair relaxed at the mood. “Well, I think Bruce really wants to play some kind of game that includes alcohol and strips, and I really, reaaaally want him to go home” They laugh and watched how Jay walked to the kitchen again.

Before anything could happen, Pamela cleaned her throat and removing the flannel from her shoulders. “Well, I should get going too. I need to check my house” She put the flannel on Harley’s shoulders this time and gave her a squeeze. “Thank you. It was really fun” She said smiling and walked downstairs, watching Harley in her way.

 Harley just nodded and smile, putting again her flannel and walking beside her in silence.

 She gave Jay a hug to say goodbye, thanking her for dinner and smiling. When it was Harley’s turn she seemed Hesitant for a second but she pull the woman in a quick but warm hug. There was a relief that rush on Harley’s body, like it was her way to assured her that everything was fine between them. She smiles at the gesture.

 “Thanks for dinner… see you later” She breathes and walked out the house, being followed by Bruce, who offer her too gave her a ride, which she accepted, because she couldn’t bring her car.

 Harley watched them walking and laughing and she couldn’t help feeling a little pang on her heart. It’s strange, watching her laugh with someone else. She shaked her head and closed the door. She walked to the kitchen and saw the bouquet that Pamela had bought. _Fire lilies… she remembered that these are my favorites._ She remembered that moment in the flower shop too, when she explained the man about the meaning of flowers. _I should ask her later what lily means..._


	6. Girlfriend?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Harley and Jay meet Pamela after the dinner night on the supermarket, but she was with some company that put Harley's head to spin around.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HI there! This is a little Shorter that others, but it was just to introduce someone that made Harley to discover some things about Pamela. So, hope you like it and be waiting for the next chapter ;)

“Oh, look at this! I bet we can make a wonderful barbecue with this” Harley said excited as she looked different kinds of meat at the supermarket. Its sunday morning and the couple went to some provisions shopping. “We need to make our efforts worth it.” She said happily while placing the meat in the shopping car Jay was pulling.

“Please tell me were not with this cupid thing again…” He hoped her wife will take that issue for finished, since last friday dinner. They hadn't talked to their friends since that night, only Bruce said that he left Pam on her house and they had shared a small talk on their road. He had told him that Pamela was gay, but knowing his friend, he certainly must have tried to persuade her. 

“Of course we ARE in this. The dinner night was a great progress!, they even left together. That must be a good signal that something happened there.” She flinched at the memory. Truth was, she was more concerned about how close she went with Pamela, and how she felt strange seeing the pair going together. It was like something inside her pushed her chest...and hurts. She shocked her head and thinked again in the possibilities that could bring having their friends as a couple.  _ You could see her more often and get closer. I hope she had found me nice.  _ She couldn't help to remind that moment on the rooftop.  _ The way she looked at me… it seemed that she was feeling the same as me. It seemed like she could have… No, she wouldn't. Why would she do it, anyway? Stop thinking like that Harley! She is a new friend and you already put her in strange thoughts. Bad Harley, bad. _

“Wait… you didn’t notice it?” Jay voice put her out of her thought and looked at him with confusion. He had forgotten to tell her wife about Pamela’s orientation and that's why she still thinks that they could bond the couple. 

“What?” She asked with arched eyebrows at Jay ith unbelieved face.

“Oh, you’re so naive” he joked but Harley continued to stare at him, more confused now.  _ What is he talking about. Notice what? Did Pamela make a move and I didn’t catch it? _ The thought made her stomach tight and her heart pounded with something cold and uncertain...it seemed like… fear?

“Wh- what are you talking about?”

“ What I’m talking about is that Pam is-” he couldn't finish the sentence because on the corner of the hall, their shopping car crushed with other that was passing by. They looked at whoever they crashed only to find certain Green eyed and red headed woman. “HERE!” He shouted surprised and making said woman to look at them in awe.

“He-Hey!” Pam said surprised to find them there. “It’s good to see you again” She greats and looked at the couple Smiling. The pounding in Harley’s heart increases, not for fear, but something warm inside her chest.

“Hey! You too, we were talking about-” her voice trailed off as she notices the woman next to Pamela. She had short black hair and green eyes and her arm was linked with hers. Her heart stops for a second. The woman looked at the couple and eyed Harley up and down. Harley frowned slightly and eyed her back.She felt a sudden rage burning inside her and if her eyes could shoot fire, that woman would be carbon by now.  _ Who the hell is she? _

Pamela noticed the frowning woman and cleaned her throat. “Oh yeah. Th- this is Selina. Selina, this is Jay aaand Harley”She gestures to the woman before turning to point each one. The nervous of her voice was evident and a confused Harley just tried to smile at the woman. Selina just smirked and gestures to greet them.

“Jay”, she said nodding her head and turning to face harl. “...and Harley.”  her voice was deep and sultry and the smirk she gave Harley, only made the nude in her stomach tighten. 

“Selina” The bitten in Harley’s voice was ligger but Selina didn't missed it. Her smirk widened and turned to saw a stunned Pamela.

“Hum… Ivy?” She called her in a pet name and gave her arm a light squeeze, action than made certain blonde flinch and clench her fist  _ Ivy?! Who the hell is this woman? _ . Everyone had an expectant look, waiting for some kind of introduccion or something. That seemed to get Pamela attention and cleaned her throat begging Gods to take her right there and then.  _ If you are there, I know you hate me know _

“Oh, emm…” she looked between Harley and Jay and come back to Selina, not knowing how to read her expressions.  _ Safe leave… ok, searching for a Safe leave. “ _ I- I get so much fun last dinner, we should repeat it!” She saw from the corner of her eye the ‘really?’ Glare on Selina, and something unreadable on Harley’s. Something between confusion, upset and dissleaf. 

“Oh yeah!, absolutely” Jay said smiling and Harley smile returned too but that strange look on her face is still there. Before Harley could reply, Pamela had turned her Shopping car and started to move.

“Yeah!, well… see ya!” She hurried and Selina only waves them, confused face. Jay started moving too but Harley stayed there stunned.  _ What the hell…? _

___

Pamela moved fast trying to disappear in another hall away from the couple sight. 

“Whoa wooo- hold your horses there Ivy.” Selina laugh and turned to a flushed Pamela. “What the hell was that? That blonde seemed like she wanted to take my head in a spike” She chucked at the image of Harley’s face. She knows there’s a story behind there she didn’t know...yet.

“Oh well… ” A nervous Pamela started after a defeated sigh. She knows her best friend, she wouldn't let her at last she tell her the truth. “Do you remember that wedding I attend a few weeks ago?”

___

“What are you talking about?”

“That’s what I was trying to tell you” Jay explained to a confused Harley while they keep shopping. “Pam is gay” and with that Harley’s brain stops working. All her brain and physiological process collapsed and started to run again only to process that words.

_ She’s gay...she’s into women. She flirts women. She dates women. She kisses women… she… _

“She’s gay…” she mumbled, her view still lost in the walls while they keep walking.

“Yeah, like that celebrities.” He understand his wife shock. Pam is a wonderful person and she’s really beautiful. It’s normal think that as she could have every men she likes, she would chose a men, but in his point of view, she could have any men or women she likes.

“So.. she’s not interested in Bruce at all…” the light hopefully in her voice seemed strange in her. She wanted their friends to be together, but in the back of her mind she knew it was because she wanted to get closed to Pamela. This new revelation put in a new context her previous facts with the redhead.  _ So that time in the rooftop… she REALLY could be flirting with me? We do firth… so that means… _

“Of course not, and now I see why. You saw that girl with her? Seemed like she has a girlfriend after all” Jay words went straight to Harley’s heart. In a few seconds, the warm running though her body turned into ice that pierce every fiber of her body.

“No!” She snapped making Jay jolt in surprise “SHE can’t be her girlfriend. she doesn't look good for her…” The simple thought made her stomach turn.  _ She is not her girlfriend… she...can`t be. That's why they had linked arms before?. No, that's not true. She would have said so before… she just can't be Pamela’s type. But… she even called her “Ivy” and they seemed so close to each other… is that true? So she have that… special person? _

_ ____ _

“Whooa, you’re in troubles. Flirting with a married woman? Thats too bold for you. And here I’m thinking that you would end up alone into some kind of rain forest for the rest of your life” Selina said playfully, after hearing all the story from Pamela.

“That doesn't matter! She’s straight and maybe she didn’t even know that I was flirting. She was just… being nice, that’s all” Thinking that is even more painful. Being unaware of feelings is almost the same as being rejected. Knowing that she have to keep her feelings captives is a reminder of what she can't have. 

“Pff, just being nice? With that death glare she gave me?. I`ve known you for a century and I would let your ass freeze first before I would give you my jacket.” They were turning a corner when they spot the couple again and Selina didn’t hesitate in making some fun. Pam tried to turn away for the iron grip of Selina’s arm didn’t allowed her.

“Hey there! How’s shopping going?” Selina  greets them with a wide smile and Pamela had that nervous face again.  Jay smiled as well and Harley just looked at Pamela, still confused for what’s going on here.

“Great! We are buying snacks for the soccer game. We support the same team” Jay said while snaking his arm around Harley's waist and pulling her close. It was a sweet and happy gesture. Harley tried her best to keep smiling at the woman in front of her. Pamela looked at her with the same sparkle she shows and that seemed to liger the weight in her chest.

“Oww, thats so sweet. Is’n it?” She turned to Pamela who gave her a dead glare.

“Yeah, it’s really nice” she forced a smile mimicking Harley’s.  _ This woman is hell… _

“Selina,” Jay asked her and she faced him expectantly “Are you gay?” A smug smirk formed in his face when he felt Harley tense beside him, followed by a ‘Oh my god’ from her.  _ WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU!? _

Pamela and Selina stared agape at them. Selina chucked at jay boldness. “If I am gay? Ha! I swing both ways in fact” 

“So… you two-”he gestures to both women and Harley’s stomach couldn’t be more knotted seeing the hard flush on Pamela’s face.  _ Please… don’t say it… _

“NO!” Pam shooted first, making all of them jolt. “I- I mean, No, no, we're..” Her face is so warm that she could easily fry an egg there. Her eyes never leaving Harley’s. Selina notices this and gave her a sided hug.

“Is not like I haven’t tried before but…”She closes her face to Pamela’s “She loves another...” she smirked, trying to catch harley’s reaction with the corner of her eye. “So we are besties and single”

Harley stared wide eyed at the revelation, releasing a breath she didn’t know she was holding. And a small smile formed on her face and a sparkle in her eyes.  _ I knew they weren't a couple. HA! In your face, you little-... wait. She do loves someone? _

Pamela detangled herself from Selina’s embrace and took her arm. “Well, we have hurry so, Good luck!, Bye!” She hurryes tugging from Selina, and leaving the couple with no words.

“B-bye…” Harley waves weakly  at them, speechless, watching how Pamela increased her speed and Selina doesn’t stop laughing.

“Well… at last we figured that they’re not a couple…” Jay said chucking. Harley just slapped his arm playfully, a huge grin on her face. Her heart was fluttering again now that she  is sure Pamela is single.  _ GOD, control yourself Harl. Just because they’re not a couple, doesn´t mean she has a crush on you too. But… the way she looks at me. Now that I know she’s into women, the things that had happen seems… clearer. _

A couple of minutes more, the women arrived to the cashier and certain couple were already in the front cashier.

“Hey again” Jay waves them and Harley turned with a such a warm smile that Pamela’s heart melted and she couldn't help but smile back and wave at her. “You are not follow us, aren’t you?” 

“Of course not. We’re just ...going to stay here… and greet!” Pam said smiling while she and selina put her shopping in the casher.

“Well, then we-- greet back” Jay played along and smiles too. Everyone jokes and laugh, but a  pair of eyes, never leave each other all the way. Green and blue melted together and sparkles shine behind each of them.

They seemed like a pair of teenagers in their first summer love. Stolen glares and smiles here and there, always earning a brush from the other.

 

_ Maybe… she feel it too after all... _


	7. Feelings and Daydreams

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pamela decides to try put distance between her and Harley, but the blonde is more and more aware of her feelings.

Pamela leans against her desk on the little laboratory she has on her department. She lives up the flower shop and was a large place with a little rooftop where she have different kinds of plants and flower, most of them, for scientific topics. She writes and rewrites different formulas she has been working on, but in the tiredness and sleepiness situacion she is, made think a little difficult. 

 

She puffs a bust of hair through her nose and take of her glasses, resting them on the papers on her desk and throwing her head back along with her body, rolling backside on her chair and rubbing the bridge of her nose. Her neck felt sore and her eyes started to blur at the excessive use she had expose them.

 

It's been a couple of weeks. Things were very busy on the flower shop. Between events, current clients, and some laboratory test for the university she was helping on, Pamela hasn't been able to attend her social life. It not exactly like she had one, but she had tried her most to stay busy and focused on work. Most of it, because she needs to keep her mind focused, always with the hope of restrict certain thoughts and feelings that had been consuming her being.

 

Her last encounter with Harley had been, for say the less, awkward. She is sure now that the blonde know her preferences, and if there was a little restriction on her mind that had been  trying to tell her that Harley was just being friendly and there was no other reasons behind her actions, there were discarded by the behavior the blonde showed when selina was there the other day. She seemed, disappointed and angry every time she glares at selina and the show of relief on her face once she found they were not a couple, turned her mind to spin on all kind of possible scenarios when Harley could have a slight attraction to her.

 

It warmed her heart. She was certainly a reserved person, some could even say a cold one. In the flower shop she needs to be kind with her customers, but on her real element, the Doctor inside her, is methodic, and numb. Met Harley put a new perspective on her life. She found herself smiling more often, even real ones around her clients. Even Selina jokes about how Harley had ‘hit me hard’, and the simple thought made her shiver. She knows what that woman does on her. It’s something that she had certainly never experienced before. Sure, she had dated before, but they always ended to get bored of her life and leave. All those feelings burned inside her everytime she sees her or hear her voice, and she should be happy knowing that there was a possibility that Harley feels the same way… but is not the case.

 

She is scared. She knows that Harley is not a free woman. She is married, and her husband is a good and sweet man. He doesn't deserve to be cheated or to lose the woman he loves just because she was attracted to her. Maybe it’s just a phase, and she certainly don't want to get between a married couple. No care if her feelings for Harley are true, she needs to keep her distance. If it’s true that the blonde is developing feelings for her, she need to stop them, before it gets too far.

 

_ It would seem hypocritical… I told the same to Bruce the day he rides me back. _

 

She remember talking with the man that night. He was teasing her  about some maried womens he had sleep with and when she showed her disagree about that, he asked her if she had ever thought about being with married person. She froze in that moment, but she assured him, that she could never do it, because marriage is a bond, that no man or woman should broke. It was a teasing moment, but it hit Pamela, harder that she had expected.

She was sure that she needed to put the most distance she can between she and the woman, even when it could break her heart.

 

_ I could never… even if she feel it too. AWWW!! Why did you have to do that Pamela?! Why dont you just put your eyes on a single woman? Is it so difficult? Why the only person that is making you feel like... human, is currently with someone else? _

 

Her inner screaming was cut of when her phone rang and she jolts back to reality. She answered only to find a cute voice coming from a lovely child she knows very well on the other side.

 

“Hi Red! What ya doing?” The chelful in Lucy voice made a huge smile on her face. The girl is very affectionate with her, and she found herself falling for the little cutie. She always had a bland spot for childs, and Lucy is pure sweetness. They had been talking frequently and even Lucy started to call her ‘Red’ because she said she had the most beautiful red hair she had ever seen. 

 

“Hi Dandelion, how are you been?” She stands from her seat and walked outside the rooftop, feeling a little fresh air on her face. It is almost midday and the sun is warm. She closes her eyes feeling the pleasant sensation relaxing her body. 

 

“Good enough, but I need you to help me with something, since you’re such a walking brain”

 

Pamela Snorts at the kind way the girl found to call her a Nerd. “Sure sweet pea. What do you need?”

 

______

  
  


Harley drives with her mother to Lucy school. She is going to have a presentation, and teacher invited parents to watch what their kids done. Like her dad and Jay were working and she’s in her lunch time, she accepted her mother offer to go with her. 

 

They arrived to the building and walked inside. They  looked outside Lucy’s Classroom to all the parents that came to the presentation. Has they approached the crew, Harley spotted a redhead woman with the back to them, and her heart raised considerably, feeling chills going through her body. The woman turned to them and when wide green eyes stared at her, her heart stopped. 

 

“Hey, Pamela. Good you could come” Harley’s mom greet her and Pamela smiled shyly at them, making Harley's heart to melt.  _ Oh God… _

“Hey…” Pamela waves her and almost got lost into those icy blue eyes that froze and warmed and heart at the same time. “Umm, Lucy is about to start, we should get in” She gestures, trying to mask her nervously in her voice and hurried inside the class.

 

Harley nodded and turned to her mom “Did you know she was coming?” Harley asked surprised

 

“Yes, Didn’t I told you?. She helped Lucy with her project. She’s so kind and smart” Harley’s mom smiled showing how she appreciated Pamela’s help. She smiled too and walked into the class.  _ Yes, she is. _

  
  


Once inside, the teacher lead them to their sites, while the students prepare themselves for they presentation. Harley found herself sitting between her mother and Pamela, feeling the heat on her cheeks started to hurt because the closeness to Pamela. Cause they are sited in a large shared bench, their nels rose and her tights were touching. She could feel the warm radiating from the woman and her smell.  _ OH GOD that smell…  _  she smells like Jasmine and citrics. Something fresh and calming that flow through her nostrils to every fiber of her body. 

Even when the light inside was slight, she could see the red tint in Pamela’s cheeks and how she stole glances at her from the corner of her eye.

 

Lucy presentation started and the lights turned off. Projectors turned on and in the walls started to appear images of a rainforest and all the green they could found there. It was  like they were surrounded by plants and the sounds of animals and rain. Lucy needed to talk about flora and fauna in that regions, so Pamela, were more than happy to help her done an interactive presentation. The environment made all people there to wander and enjoy the view that the girl is showing them.

 

Harley was mesmerized by all the beauty she is seeing. She lowered her hand to rest on the bench and found a hand next to hers, little fingers overlap the other. She flinched, thinking that the woman would quit her hand, but when she didn’t, she decided to keep it there. Has the presentation keep going, her heartbeat increased, ears pounding and warm face. She seemed like was going to pass out in any moment. 

 

She dared to turn her face and look at Pamela whose stare was on the presentation, but as soon as she turned, she looked at her from the corner of her eye before facing properly. Her gaze was intense and full of warm and something more...deep that Harley couldn't put a finger on. She looked like a predator, ready to jump straight to her prey. It seemed like the time had frozen. Like the first time their eyes met. 

 

Their faces feel so close and Harley, losing control of her body, feel her hand reach to Pamela’s face and tuck a lock of hair behind her ear. Keeping her hand there and her eyes straight to Pamela’s she started leaning forward. Pamela reminded in Place, but not showing intentions of getting off her way. Harley looked at her with lidded eyes, watching any kind of resistance from her, and not finding any, she closed the gap between them. 

 

Lights turned on and everybody clasp. Harley found herself back from her daydreaming and her face was no longer in front of pamela, and her hand was not in her hair. Instead, she found herself staring at the front of the class, where Lucy was and her hand was still between Pamela and her, but Pamela’s hand was no longer there, because she was clapping and smiling.

 

She froze has everybody started to stand up and get out of the room. Her breathing was hard and her heart was pounding hard against her ribcage.

 

_ What the hell is wrong with me? _

 

___

 

Has everybody started to go out school, Pamela and Harley waited outside for Lucy and her mother, who was helping her daughter with her stuff.

 

They were in front of the other, harley leaned against the rail of the stairs and Pamela standing almost two steps from her. An awkward silence filled them, only filled by the child laughs.

 

“Humm, T-that was… awesome.” Harley broke the silence and Pamela stared at her with a confused face. “I mean, what you did for Lucy. That was awesome. Thank you” Harley said lowering her head and stealing glares at Pamela who only stared at her blinking.

 

“Oh that… that was nothing, really. I’m happy to help” She assured her with a smile that caused other blush on the woman. 

 

She stayed silent for a seconds and lowered her head, biting lightly her bottom lip.”You, emm… you have to go now, right?” She looked at pamela with pleading eyes that seemed like some puppy asking for a hug. It take all the self control in Pam to don’t do it. 

_ God! How am I going to survive thiiiiiis?? _

 

“Oh emm, no. I have time in fact.” She smiled and instantly mentally face-palmed herself for that.  _ This is your idea of putting distance? Alright I didn't know she was going to come, I hoped it was only her mother, but… Alright I’m glad she came but I need to go before- _

 

“Really?... well I… Actually I-” She moved forward trying to get close to Pamela at the same time a group of children walked between them, making her retorced. Pam smiled and both woman lower her heads. The air started to get dense and Pamela just keept her eyes on the last child that walked. 

 

Harley bitted her lip and took a deep breath. “Pam, I… there’s something that...that I think we need to talk.” The nervousness in Harley’s voice make Pamela to look at her wide eyed, realising what was she trying to say. She stared at her in shock and Harley just froze, and started beaming and giggling more nervous and a deep blush covered her face. “I… It's silly, but...I just feel like-”

 

_ Oh GOD… no no no no no... please, NO! _

“Actually…” Pam interrupted her and Harley blinked her eyes confused. “I… I remember there's something I need to do” She said with an apology  face and took a step back. 

 

“Oh… right. It-it’s okey” Harley said blinking, trying to process the sudden action of Pamela.

 

“Yeah, well… see ya letter!” She approaches the stairs and started walking as fast as she could to get away of the woman, who only stayed there trying to wave her, but the shock was more powerful, that all she could do was stare in silence at the walking woman. 

 

Harley lower her head and feel like cold water were running through her body. The sentiment of disappointment and confusion domain her trying to get together on what she was just about to say.

 

_ What was I thinking? What was I going to say her? That I kindda have a crush on her? That every time I saw her I feel this... tight thing in my chest?... That I think... HOPE, she feels it too?... this, this is strange. I need to stop doing this. Get it together Harl. This… is just on your head so just… stop. _

 

She signed while her mother and Lucy came, asking for Pamela, and she just excused her with work. They drove in cheers for Lucy and her work, but Harkey’s mind never leave the previous facts and the redhead that have completely stole her thoughts.

 


	8. Frustration

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Harley has been trying to suppress some frustrations about her feelings but found herself more and more sinked into them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry the late, but las week things were crazy on job but I promise to upload the next chapter this weekend. Enjoy it!

 

The last days had been rough, said the less. Harley’s usually enthusiasm in work hadn’t showed and she founds herself more focused in her own thoughts that in whatever her patients are telling to her. She excuses herself with having a headache and canceling her last meetings, only to go some coffee or bar, trying to ignore the mess that is yelling in her head and in other parts of her body. When she arrives home, usually earlier than Jay, she puts some music on her IPhone, letting spotify to fill the room while taking long cold showers, in an attempt to suppress all the stress and frustration that is growing and increasing inside her every day. 

 

Cold water run throw her body and yet it feels like she’s burning. She feels an ache in her chest that slowly descends to her lower belly and hold in her core. She groans and squeezes her legs tightly in hope that this make the ache to low. It doesn’t work. The ache only got worse, making the pulse between her legs to increase furiously and making her let out a throaty whimper.

 

\-  _ I'm seeing the pain, seeing the pleasure,  _

_ Nobody but you, 'body but me,  _

_ 'body but us bodies together - _

 

Maybe it was casuality or karma that implanted on her devises, but music wasn't helping her condition at all. To Harley’s fortune or dislike, the song shifts and when she heard the beginning of “Talking body” song, she knew that Karma was playing with her a game that she knows, she’s gonna lose.  _ Fuck… _

 

_ -Bed, stay in bed. The feeling of your skin locked in my head… _

 

_ Now if we're talking body _

_ You got a perfect one _

_ So put it on me _

_ Swear it won't take you long _

_ If you love me right _

_ We fuck for life _

_ On and on and on _

 

_ Love, give me love _

_ Anything you want _ _ I _ _ 'll give it up _

_ Lips, lips I kiss _

_ Bite me while I taste your fingertips- _

 

It’s silly to get aroused by a song, but in her condition, that words had turned her on in ways she only thought that happened in movies or something. Her skin was flushed, even with the cold water, her breathing was heavy and the heat between her legs were still there and showing no signs to go away without a release. She rested her head on her forearm while resting against the showerwall. Her heartbeat were erratic and her legs started to get weak.

 

_ Fuck this… _

 

She lowered one hand to her belly and started descending, shivers through her body each time that get in contact with new sensitive skin, feeling goosebumps forming on it. When her hand placed between her legs and her fingers found the bundle of nerves there, she bit her arm to suppress the moan that the action caused.

 

She didn’t bothered to start slow because all her senses were already at the edge, knowing that the wetness between legs were not just from the shower. She circled her clit harshly, almost painful, every time faster than before. Her hips bucked against her hand and her pants were louder and louder. Her head was clouded in pure bliss and her legs started to become jelly. She wanted to realise… she  _ needed _ to realise, and the knowledge that she was close only made the knot in her stomach to thighted. 

 

Suddenly her head started to spin, and her mind pictured other hand that was not hers, a warm and strong arm that no belonged to her body snakeing on her waist from behind, and even when she knows that she was doing that panting and moans, she could hear another voice, followed by hot breath on the back of her neck and whispering in her ear.

 

_ Harl…  _

 

A panting and deep voice resonate in her head. A voice she knows very well and which she has been dreaming for the last weeks. A female voice that is like honey melting on her body,  and in fractions of seconds her body got stiff when she felt  a lighting traveled from head to toes. She came so hard that the air leave her limbs and her knees went weak, almost loosing the balance, hips bucking erratically, while she allowed that sensation to fill her. 

 

When she came back from the high of her orgasm and allowed her breath to return to normality, her mind process what have just happened. This was a routine that has been happening since that daydream the other day. The one that pictured Pamela and her almost kissing. The mere thought made other pulse of her inner walls, but the emptiness there made it painful. She groaned and started to finish cleaning herself. 

 

It make her upset to feel this way. So frustrated, mentally and sexuality speaking. It started with simple thoughts, wandering around the woman and her features. Her intense gaze, the warm of her skin and that fiere hair that she had pictured to fist into her hands. That day when she tried to speak with Pamela and she leaves, she returned home late and had made love with Jay, desperate to erase other thoughts in her mind. This only increased them and added the sexal tension to her daydreams. Jay where more than happy to comply her wife's demands but she knows that if she pushes the issue to much, he could suspect something was wrong, so she makes all this ritual to satiate her hungry self. 

 

She feels almost guilty. Being intimate with her husband when she has other thoughts. 

 

_ I know this couldn't be possible, that nothing is going to really happen between us. This is just… a stupid attraction. A REALLY strong one, but that's all. It doesn’t mean anything. Besides, if all of this is just in my head, I’m not cheating on him, right? _

When she walks out of the bathroom she hear the front door open, showing that Jay has just arrived home.

 

“Hey sweetie, you’re early” Jay approach her and gave her a peck on her temple.

 

“Yeah, I didn’t felt well so I came to take a shower.”  _ Lair _

 

“You have been feeling stressed lately. You need to rest and relax. “ He caressed the side of her arms with both hands. “You know what? Today is the spring festival. Why don't we go and have some fun?” This light up Harley’s face. She had forgotten about the festival, and it’s one of her favorites since she was a child. She accepted and they started to dress.

 

___

 

She hate this festival. Every year is the same. People always so loud and all the mess they do is annoying. She only accepted to come here cause Selina forced her to do it, after she found her sleeping in her desk and drooling all over her papers. She needed a distraction and some fresh air. Even when Selina had  bring her here, she is now sitting in some coffe table speaking with a random guy who started flirting with her. Pamela just rolled her eyes and started walking along the festival.

 

She was distracted by some guy playing with fire balls when she felt tiny arms wrapping her waist from behind and turning to find a grinning blonde girl looking at her.

 

“RED! You’re here!” Lucy exclaimed and Pamela smiled warmly at the little girl.

“Hey Sweet Pea. Having fun?” She embraces the little girl feeling that happiness that always flows around her.

“Yeaph. Mommy and Daddy are sitting right there, so they leave me wander a little for my own” She pointed to the old couple in a bench and when they spotted Pamela, they wave her happily. She returned the gesture and turned to the still smiling girl. “Would you like to eat ice cream with me?” She asked hopefully, and Pamela Noded, following the girl into the crew. 

 

____

 

_ This is lovely. Jay was right. I needed some fun time. _

 

They were wanderers around the festival for some time and harley fonds charmed by all the colors and joy that surrounded the place. It reminded her the old times, when there was only Jay and her, enjoying without troubles. It seems so long since that times. Truth was that they never stopped being that close with each other, but work and life experiences had made difficult to enjoy the same things again. They had changed through the years but It warmed her heart that they could still spend some time like that. After all, they always had been best friends. 

 

After scanning the place a little more between all the people and busy events, she realized that it was in this festival when Jay had asked her to be his girlfriend all those years ago. It was in this festival too, a couple of years ago when he proposed her to marry, and this is this first festival that they spend as a married couple. She looked at him, beside her and with a warm smile on his face, watching all the people making fun. He was a little older now, taller too, but that smile is the same he had had always. And she knew that smile is because of her. Because she is on his side and always had been.

 

She doesn’t pictured how it could be if he didn't have that smile… if she wasn’t at his side, will he still be smiling that way? 

 

Jay turned to her, realizing that she had been staring at him for a time, and opened his arms to captured her in a sweet hug. Harley accepted and returned the gesture, resting her head on his chest, closing her eyes and enjoying the warm of those arms which had been protecting her for years.  _ This still feels the same throughout the years. Warm… secure… cared. _

 

A loud sound broke into the sky, and this illuminates with lots of fireworks that sparked, filling the night with colors and movement. Harley smiled and nuzzed in the embrasse.  _  Yeah, this feels like the old times…  _

 

She opened her eyes and started wandered between the sky and the people. This was when something catches her eyes. A red melene and light tanned skin that belonged to a grinning gorgeous woman at the other side of the crew.  _ Pam…  _ Her heart stopped. She was beaming and seemed like she was with someone else, but the people didn’t let her who was that person. Her green eyes sparking, almost shining into the darkness. The few moments when the fireworks illuminated her face, she looked alluring and all he gestures seemed genuine, like she really was enjoying that time.

 

She tensed her body, feeling that sparkles going straight to her heart and starting to melting with them. This was catched by Jay and he started to get back from the hug.

 

“Hey, are you Okey?” He asked her with concerned eyes and she instantly felt guilty.   _ C'mon Harl, look what you’re doing. This is the sweetest men on earth, cared about you and giving you everything he has for your being, and here you are, stunned by a woman you barely know.  _

“Oh.. yeah. I Just had a headache” Lair. “Can we just… go home already?” He nodded and they walked hand in hand though they parked car. She stole a last glare to the redheaded woman, but she had already disappeared from her sight. 

 

When they arrived to the apartment, Jay was planning their weekend activities when a sudden call surprised them and he exited the room to answer his phone. While he was speaking, it seemed like it was from work because her face were tense, Harley placed back and forth in the livingroom. 

 

She couldn't forget that smile on Pamela’s face. It was alluring, genuine, and made every fiber of her body to heat and collide with others. The remind of all those thought that had been invaded her for days returned. She didn't feel shame, she feels excited and drunk in them. She glared to the living table and watched the Telephone. Without thinking she took it and digited Pam’s number.  _ Yeah, you're such a creep for have memorized it from fer card.  _ She remind herself taking one from the flower shop and memorizing every detail of it. 

 

The phone started to ring and a sudden fear invaded her, realizing what she’s doing.  _ Please, don't answer… please don’t- _

 

_ “Hello?”  _ Harley froze when she hear that sweet voice on the other side. Her throat gone dry and she gasped a few times, like a fish, trying to figured some words, but nothing came. She stayed in silence and she could hear a soft humm from the phone.  _ “Humm… Hello?, is someone there?”  _ And then she hang up. She tossed the phone in the sofa and popped on it, bringing her hands to her head and groaning in frustration while she trower her head back. 

 

_ You Coward! At last if you’re going to do something stupid, do it till the end. The good thing is that Pam doesn't have this number so she didn't know it was her.  _

 

In that moment, Jay came back with a heavy sigh. She knew that means bad news from them

 

“Sorry honey, My father just telled me that I need to attend to a meeting out of the city tomorrow. I’ll be out all the weekend.” He said with sorry. They had made plans to go to a Soccer game, but it seemed like it couldn't be possible. 

 

“Oh don't worry, sweetie. We could hang out when you came back” She was a little disappointed. She really wanted to go that game, but she knows that Jay’s work were sometimes unexpected, so she needed to get used to that and deal with it. 

 

“But what about the game? You really wanted to-” He was cutted of when the phone started to rang and harley felt panic rising when Jay took it to answer whoever were in the line.  _ OH SHIT... _

 

“Hello?” Pam asked to the person that had called her before. Maybe the line had problems, so that's why she didn't hear anything, so she decided to call them back. 

 

“Pam? Hey! What’s up?” Jay asked, a little surprised to hear the woman voice, and ignoring the fact that Harley was totally flushed and begging earth to swallow her. 

 

“Jay?, humm hey I just… I get this call on my phone and I...” She asked a little confused. Why was he called her and… why it seemed like he hadn’t done it?

 

“OH!” Jay exclaimed like having a sudden lighting up in her mind. “You call in the right moment. I need to ask you a favor” he started to walk around the living room and Harley unfrozen from her shock and her panic attack raised, knowing what Jay is going to say. She tried unsuccessfully to get the phone, but he didn't allowed her. 

 

“Humm… yeah. What is it?”

“I need to get out of the city this weekend, and I was hoping you could accompany my wife to a soccer game this saturday.” He shrugged and suppressed a giggle as Harley climbed almost on top of him to trying to stop him. “ I don’t want her to be alone, so I think you two could hang out”

 

Pam blinked a few times, not entirely sure she has hear well.  _ Is he really asking me to spend time with her wife?... I- I Don't think that’s a good idea. An that day is... but this is a really rare occasion. Its a favor to him. Nothing is really need to happen. Just… two friends hanging out. Yeah. that's it.  _

 

“Emm… yeah, sure.” She could hear her nervousness in her voice while her heart was pounding frantically. 

 

“Awesome!, she will call you for details. Thank you so much! Bye.” While he hanged up he found a pouty harley glaring at him.

 

“Why did you do that? I barely know her. Why if she had other plans?” She tried to fake annoyed but truth was that her heart was flowering and trying to get out of her chest to start dancing. 

 

“You need to have fun and, with Pamela? C’mon, she’s like your… soulmate or something! I’m sure you two would have fun” he smiled and make a face of thinking for a second. “Humm...I need a beer” And he stormed to the kitchen.

 

Harley’s brain turned off at the moment he said ‘Soulmate’. She found herself grinning widely and with a kind warm that filled her body. She signed at that possibility and surrendered at the idea.

 

_ So… technically… It’s a date. _

 

That night, Both women had little troubles to sleep, and not because stress or frustrated thoughts. It was because the hope of the new growing hope that is raising in their hearts. They slept like that, with a full heart and a smile on their faces. 


	9. The lily means...

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Harley and Pamela went to a girls night and spend time together. New experiences made them grew close to the other... very close.

 

They say that there's nothing more effective to warm you up in a chilly night as the good company. Well, ‘warm’ is not exactly the word Harley would use to describe how does it feel to be near Pamela. Especially when the two are standing next the other, shoulders touching, while they watched the Soccer game.

 

She had spend all day trying to convince herself that this was not a date. Nu-hu. They were just two friends spending a night of fun like good friends do. There’s no reason why it should be more than that. That was was she tell herself to calm her pounding heart every time her brain remind her that she was going to hang out with Pamela, just the two of them… alone.

 

She was starting to believe in her thoughts and was almost sure that that was not a date, but when Pamela showed on her door holding a bouquet of lilies, that were ‘about to fade and couldn't carry them to her house’ as she said, Harley broke. She was so sweet and has she has no car, Pamela offer herself to drive them on her own. They drove to the stadium between laughs and cheers, and their hearts couldn't be more filled with excitement and happiness.

 

The stadium was very busy and  they were near the field. Harley was very excited for the game and although Pamela seemed like she wasn't a fan, she had a pleasant smile on her face. They constantly found themselves staring at the other woman when said wasn't looking, just enjoying each other's presence.

 

Harley was so lost in Pam’s features that she missed the goal from the other team, and she woke up at the sound of boos. She blinked and turned her gaze to the soccer players, reading what have had happened and feeling like a pressure cooker ready to explode.

 

“WHAT THE HELL?! WHAT’S GOING ON WITH YOU? YOU’RE BLIND OR SOMETHING?!” She yelled at the number 9 player, who’s poor defence was the key to the other’s team goal.

 

Pamela just smiled at Harley’s attitude. She could seem like a cute and reserved girl, but this seems to be her true nature. Passionate and very expressive. She just chucked at the sight of Harley’s frowned eyebrows and pouted mount.   _So… so cute. How could I not fall for her if she keeps looking like this?... wait, fall for...? Oh God._

 

The most she yell and jump, the more the player just kept walking, ignoring the woman and making Harley’s rage to rise. “OW C’MON! DON’T PRETEND YOU’RE NOT LISTEN ME! YEAH!, I’M SPEAKING WITH YOU NUMBER 9!” She buffed air and her fist were into balls in the air.

 

“I don’t think he can hear you” pamela said nonchalantly and harley turned confused to face her.

 

“Why? I mean, we are less than 10 mts. Why couldn't he hear me?”

 

“Well… your voice is a little...High pitched. You need to project your voice if you want them to hear you.” She smiled at her and Harley’s rage eased. She smiled back  and stared into those bright green eyes. The night was chilly and Pamela’s nose and cheeks had turned a little red, and with that bright smile, harley’s heart doesn’t resist more time to melt.

 

“Teach me” She look at her sweetly and Pamela’s heart jolts at the sight. She chucked and leaned closer to her.

 

“Alright. First, you need to tense your stomach muscles” Harley chuckled at this and turned her gaze to the field again.

 

“I don’t think I have any” she says and looks for the corner of her eye as Pamela giggles.

 

“Yes, you really have.” she positioned herself beside her. “Right here” she puts a hand above Harley’s stomach and she straightened instantly. She looks how she tooks a deep and shaky breath and nods. “Tight” She applied a little more pressure in her hand, trying to let harley know that she need to apply more force. “Tense them”

 

“They are pretty tense…” Harley breaths, letting out a breath she didn't know she was holding. Having Pam’s hand in almost physical contact with her body caused her cheeks to warm. She watched how Pamela giggle at this.

 

“Okay, now… let’s expand your diaphragm”

 

Harley chuckled and turned to face Pamela with an arched eyebrow and a bold smirk. “My what?” Of course she knows what a diaphragm is, and as much nervous she was, she couldn't let this situation to pass. It just seemed like the perfect moment to flirt.

 

Pam rolled her eyes and her smiled widened. “It’s here, silly”  Harley felt how Pam’s hand rose and stopped just below her breast. Her breath hitched at the friction and a little whimper came from her mouth before she could stop it. _GOD Harl, control yourself!_

 

“O- oh…” That's all she could manage before turned her attention to the field again. Her heartbeat was speeding so much that she was sure Pamela can feel it.

 

“Now try to push it out against my hand” Pamela watched closely at Harley flushed face. She admires her features: Her blonde locks that escapes from her hat that cascades on her face, Her icy blue eyes that shine almost surreal in the night and the red cheeks that she knows she was causing them. Harley just stayed silent. “You feel my hand, right?” she ask and squeezes her hand a little. She was wearing a thick sweater, so it was difficult to tell if she was doing it right.

 

“Humm…” Harley averted her eyes wandering to the ground. “M-maybe if you use both hands…” She mumbled and the flush in her face deepened. Pamela’s eyes widened and her heart started to rise again. _OH. MY. GOD._ She positioned carefully behind Harley and slide her arm to her side and embraces her, placing her other hand above the other in Harley’s stomach and interlaced her fingers, creating a solid bond and grip with them. Her heart was pounding furiously against her ribcage. She was too close to her she can smell her shampoo and perfume. She felt tense, but when Harley relaxes into the hug, and used her free hand to cover hers, she relaxed too. _GOD… If I die here right now, I’ll be completely happy.._

 

The moment Pamela’s arms skaned arround her from behind, Harley felt in heaven. The warm body pressed against her back and the hot breath on her neck  were enough to relax her body and melt in the protection and kindness that Pam’s touch was. She couldn't suppress the wide smile that now adorned her face as she closed her eyes, enjoying the sensation. She feels so right, so whole than she had felt in her entire life. This is what Pamela brings into her. The heat of her body against hers and the kindness that melted her heart. This is what it feels like being near Pam.

 

Pamela cleaned her throat lightly, trying to focus on the situation. “Well… and now the big one” She whispered on Harley’s ear. Hot breath on her cheek. “Imagine that your mount is a Cathedral” She turned her head a little in search for Harley’s comprehension, and so she does too. They stared at the other, close faces, just a couple of inches from the other. Harley grins and she does too. Hot breath against each other mounts. Red lips never looked so attractive to the other than the pair in front. This closeness were so tempting that any of them could easily close the space between them in any moment.

 

Harley beamed and shacked lightly her head, never breaking ever contact with Pamela ”and now I’m lost” she watched how Pamela giggled. _GOD I love that giggles… wait, what?._ Before she could react she felt the warm of the body behind her to fade and that kind hands releasing her waist.

 

“Oh C’mon…”  Pamela giggles as she realised Harley but found warm hands taking hers, like a desperate intent to pervert her to back away.

 

“No, no, I- I mean… All that about the mount, diaphragm, the cathedral , is just…” She was babbling as she tried to understand what had happen. She was so lost in Pam’s touch that she couldn't put attention in her instructions.

 

“Is just space thing, okey?” Pam explained sweetly, releasing her hands, but assuring her with her eyes that it was okey. “Your mount is THAT big, that you need to fill it with sound.” as she said this she couldn't help but stare at Harley’s lips and instinctively licked her owns. “Deep from inside, filling the space and throwing it out” She gestures at each explanation and turned to the field, explaining that the sound would fly for all of them.

 

Harley was mesmerized for the passion that used to explain her. She just smiled sweetly at her. “Like what?”

 

“Humm… like this” She watched how Pamela turned to the field and took a deep breath from her nose. Her back straightened and her chest puffed.

 

“YOU’RE A WANKER, NUMBER 9!” The power of that yell could easily be compared like a battle cry. It traveled for all the field and the street outside for sure. Said player, that were far from them by now, turned to their direction with a confused face, to keep running after that. The whole crew around them looked at her amazed. Harley was in awe, beaming like an idiot at the amazing woman. Pamela turned at her with a proud smile and winked at her. If Harley weren't so lost, she could have blush at this, but  the action seemed just right that she just smiled back.

 

When the game finished, they walked outside the stadium into the crew. Both smiling and laughing  for the funny moment they share there.

 

“That was amazing! Where did you learn to do that?”

 

“Well, when I was on high school, one of my classmates used to cry very loud. I mean, really loud! When she speaks into audience, she didn’t need a Microphone. Selina and I used to make fun of her sometimes. We used to say she was like Black Canary or something!” They laugh and Harley couldn't help but notice that Pamela seemed to be a secret comic fan. “Anyway, I used to be a little shy and my voice were so quiet. Once I studied her, I found her technique, so after hard practice, I dominate her cry too.”

 

“That’s cool. I need to practice that too.” As they walk she remembered that Pam had mention Selina. She still had that strange feeling on her stomach when she hear about the woman, but she knows that there’s nothing between them. She opted to learn more about the theme. “So, Selina and you have known since then?” She tried to hide the bitter on her voice, and It seemed to work, since Pamela nodded happily.

 

“Yeah, we used to share some classes, but never talked. One day on a botanic class we get  partnered, because I was the best on it and Selina was the worse. They assumed that would be balanced, but  Selina made a mistake with a chemical and we almost ended poisoned. I could get to fix it, because I was used to poison ives, so it didn’t affect me. We have been friends since then.” Pam explained between giggles and nostalgic sights.

 

“Oh, so that’s why she call you Ivy, right? Like poison ivy.” Pamela turned at her, with a confused face. Her eyebrows rose, wide eye and her cheeks turned a shade of red. _Oww look at that face! She's the cutest thing ever!...well, after that giggles._

 

“D-Do you remember that?” Pam asked between stuttering. It was Harley’s turn to blush and she gave her a weak smile, trying to hide her almost panic attack.

 

“Y-yeah. I remember a lot of things of you. _Wait, what?._ I-I mean, I remember because I thinked I was cute, like you. _Again… WHAT?_ No, I mean. It’s like you, like all the flower things and that, It suits you. I...” They both turned away, too flushed to face the other. If anyone could hear the others heartbeat, they would know for sure that they were equally excited and scared with all the sensations and thoughts that flowed into their minds.

 

Pamela break the silence cleaning her throat, making Harley turn slowly to her. “T-thanks.” she said quietly and gave Harley a sheepishly smile. Harley just smiled back, both very flushed at this point. “So, humm. What now? Would you like to do something, or eat or…” she trailed off, trying to change the subject to something not so embarrassing.

 

 _Ohhh, if you only knew what I want to do… “_ Well, you actually made me company here. You chose. What do you what to do?” Harley smiled at her and Pamela seemed to think a little.

 

“Well, I’m not sure. I feel like dancing, but I don’t think we’re dressed for the occasion” They were wearing very casual clothes. Pamela wore a green shirt with a long light brown sweater,  black stockings and short brown boots. Hayley wore a long and thick cream sweater with a red scarf, black jeans and high boots. The touch were a black and warm hat on her head.

 

Harley smiled malevolently and a huge grin appeared on her face. “Oh, don't worry.  I know where we can have some fun” Pamela looked at her expectantly, but smirked, hurrying their way to the car.

 

____

  


Pamela expected Harley to lead her to some kind of bar, mostly because she ask her go to her apartment again. She thinked it was because she needed to change clothes or something but when they parked outside and Harley started to walk along the street, she knew this girl had something different on mind.

 

In fact, they arrived to an arcade place a couple of blocks from the apartment.She remembered Selina trying to draw her to some places like this before, but she always ended letting her down. Now, however, the idea of being here with Harley seemed exciting.

 

As they walk into the place, she could spot different kinds of games and wonder which one Harley would chose. Harley lead her to a specific room, and that was when everything made sense. They reach a room with XBOX games, and they arrived at one with “Just Dance 2016”  game on it. She turned to Harley and the blonde was smiling at her widely.

 

“You said you’re feeling like dance. Let’s see if you can beat me here” Harley removed her sweater and scarf  and grinned proudly at her.

 

“Oh dear. You need to know that if you’re challange me, you can’t take it back” Pamela returned the smirk with an arched eyebrow and removed her own sweater too.

 

At first, Harley showed that this was not her first time here, dominating the stats and making smudge faces to Pamela, who only smirked and selected their next song.

 

“Seems like you’re not so confident now, Pam”  Harley teased her and looked how Pamela keeped moving too cautiously, almost methodical, A little of frustration showed on her face. She knows Pamela could be organized and careful with everything she does, but she always ended too stressed with it. She need her to relax. “C’mon Pam, just let it go. Forget about everything for a while. Just dance with me” She pleaded with a sweet smile.

 

Pam stared at her blankly before closing her eyes and take a heavy breath. She let her muscles relax and started to enjoy the dance like what it was: A dance, for fun… with Harley. It seemed to work because her movements beginning to be more fluent and accurate at the rhythm. She even ended approaching Harley at the last movements.

 

“THAT’S what I was talking about!” Harley grinned at her, all sweaty and panting. Pamela was in the same condition as her. A light layer of sweat cover her flushed body. When she straightened herself and ,with her hand, threw strands of hair behind her head, Harley could saw trails of sweat running from her neck and getting lost in the valley of her breast. She swallowed hard and raised her glare to her face. Pamela was looking at her, smirking and with lidded eyes. Her glare was almost predatory, sparkles behind her eyes and face reddened for the eforse. Her red curls were messy, and reflecting the lights of the place. She was taking heavy breaths, chest rising and falling with each one. The heat of her body were evident and the only thought that crossed Harley’s mind were that THAT was the sexiest thing she had ever seen. Her throat felt suddenly dry and she couldn't dare to break her stare. _DEAM! This woman is the human version of sex appeal._

 

“So… ready for the next one?” Pam asked between breaths, and if Harley hasn’t known the context where she had say it, that have had sound so seductive and tempting. She only noded, cleaning her mind from possible scenarios where she would like to hear Pamela said that and prepared to keep dancing.

 

They danced like there was none else in the room. They laugh and cry like little childs, just enjoying being with the other. Pamela never felt so live in so long time. She always have been in control of her life, her emotions, and being prudent in front of people. She never allowed herself to let their emotions burst free, but with Harley… she feels no need to keep them. She wanted to let all her emotions and fears fly out her chest, and watching how bright Harley’s smile is and her eyes sparkling with joy, she knows that is okay to feel, that she doesn’t need to be afraid to messed up sometimes.; That it’s okay to LIVE. _This day was meant to me happy and cheers. But this is for much the best day of my life._

 

Hours passed and when they leave the place they were laughing and making fun of themselves. The night were colder that the afternoon and when Harley noticed Pamela shiver she linked arms with her, bringing their bodies closer and sharing their heat. Not that Pamela would mind at all. She playfully put one cold hand against the blonde’s cheek and laughing at how she squealed and slapped her arm in response.

 

“Oh, you’re an evil woman, you know that?” Harley said as she rubbed her cheek to warm it again,  tugging at her linked arm with Pam. She has enough warm with Pamela’s closeness, end enjoy being this naturally touchy with her. “You’re really Poison Ivy”

 

“Oh C’mon, that’s fun. And don’t tell me that you’re gonna  start to call me like that too, because I have enough with Selina, thanks”

“I think is pretty accurate. You seem to know everything about greens and you do that scientific stuff too. You’re literally a genius!” Harley explained with her free arm to the sky.

 

“Well I can't complain to that” Pamela made a smug smirk and walked rising her nose proundly. Harley giggled at that and they walked in silence. She suddenly remembered that she needed something of Pamela’s Knowledge.

 

“Hey Pam…” She hummed in response, letting her know that she was listening. “What does the lily means?” She felt how the redhead tensed  and looked at her with a confused expression. “I mean, that time in your store, you were telling a man what some flowers meant. Tell me about the Lily”

 

Pamela averted her eyes a little and her face were a little more red. She chucked and looked at the ground. “Huum… nah. You don’t want to.” She said a nonchalantly, but her body started to shake, and not for the cold exactly. _OH shit. Well done Pam. Now think on something before she ended pushing too much. “_ Why don’t you ask me about the azaleas?” she offer and watched how the blonde arched an eyebrow.

 

“But lilies are my favorites…” Pamela keeped looking at her sheepishly and she had to let a defeated sigh. “All Right...tell me about the Azaleas” she mocked being upset, making a face and looking at Pamela.

 

“Well...Azaleas means that you will reach your economic stability!” She said hopefully that harley could follow the lead and ask other things, but the face that she gave her made her sure that she won’t

 

“Okay… NOW tell me about the Lily” She gave her arm a little squeeze and looked hopefully at her. _Why she didn't want me to know? Is something boring or stupid, or…_  She watched how Pamela went silent and her body got stiff. Her glare were on the ground again and she started to walk slowly.

 

She felt how Pamela slided her arm, unlinked it with hers and she feared that she had pushed something wrong and she got uncomfortable or upset with her. She was about to retract her question but she was interrupted by the clean of throat that Pam made.  

 

“W-well… the lily… The lily means…” She watched how Pamela’s face were a deep shade of red and her voice were more quiet than before. She looked so shy that Harley had to hold the impulse to hug her. She stopped walking suddenly and took a deep breath. She turned her head to see Harley ,and the blonde had a patient face, waiting for whatever she was going to say. Her heart hummed in her chest and she swear it could explode in any moment.

_Now or never Pam. God bless you._

 

“The Lily means ‘I dare you to love me” And with that Pamela started walking again, approaching Harley’s apartment as fast as she could, leaving a frozen blonde behind.

 _System Failure. Press okay_ _to reboot._  
  
_'OK.'_  


Harley stayed there trying to process what she had just said. _I dare you to love me..._  


_Error encountered: Unable to load thoughts.exe. Emergency autopilot engaged._

 

She reacted and walked towards Pamela again, mind still too cloudy to understand it. They smiled sheepishly and walked the rest of the read in silent. When they arrived to the apartment, Pamela cleaned her throat and they stopped outside the door, both smiling at the other.

 

“I have so much fun tonight… thank you” She smiled sweetly at her ,eyes shining with something Harley couldn’t put a finger on, but she smiled back, sure that she had the same look right now. Today was better than she could have expected. Both hearts pounding with joy and Happiness. Pamela looked to her side for a brief moment and then returned to Harley, unsure if she need to say something or not. “Today was my birthday”

 

Harley stared wide eyed at her. “WHAT?...really?” Pamela just noded smiling “Why don't you said anything?” She started to panic that Pamela had felt obliged to accompany her and she had had already plans, but She just started laughing.

 

“Don’t worry. I have the best day in a ages. Really” She assured her and harley face relaxed.

 

“You know… mine is next week exactly.”

 

“Well, we are almost twins” They both giggled and stared at each other eyes. The air was ligger and it seemed that any barrier that existed between the two, now it doesn’t exist anymore.

 

Unconsciously both of them started to step forward, closing the distance between the two. Eyes brightening, peridots and sapphires melted in one another. None of them were enoughly conscious to know what was happening… or what is going to happen.

 

Harley leaned forward, line up her head so her face was close to Pamela’s, hot breath against her parted lips. She watched Pam with lidded eyes and rushed forward, closing her eyes in anticipation, waiting to feel the warm on her lips.

 

The lights of a car passing beside them were enough to break the spell that maintained them captives. They froze in place, lips almost brushing, none of them daring to continue or retract. Harley were the first on react and staped back instantly. _What the hell am I Doing?..._

 

Pamela cleared her throat and smiled sheepishly at her. “W-well… It’s late. I need to go.” Harley hummed in response, focused on the  ground. “Good night Harley” She smiled and hurried to her car, not daring to look back at her.

Harley rose her gaze to watch how Pamela entered to her car and started to drive away. She stood there for a couple of seconds more, before rushing into the building.

 

Once she entered the apartment, her actions were almost robotical, unable to think or feel something right now. She set her keys on the table, removed her hat and scarf and went to the kitchen for water. When she entered the kitchen, the first sigh she catched were Pamela’s flowers on the window, almost glowing. They were beautiful, different kinds of lilies. White, red, orange; all of them with their characteristic smell that filled the room.

 

_“The lily means I dare you to love me”_

 

Cold and warm collided inside her and everything that had happen in the last weeks made sense to her.

 

_So that was it… she feel this._

 

_She really does._

 

_It wasn’t just me, then._

 

_She feels something too… too_

 

_I feel… what I feel…_

 

_She feels the same…_

 

_She feels this way about me, and I…_

 

_And I…_

 

She stayed there, tears started to form in her eyes and dropped freely along her cheeks. She slumped on a near chair and keep looking at the gorgeous flowers in her kitchen window.

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HI GUYS! I know.. I know. It's been a while since I update, but believe me when I say that work is evil. But I made up for this making this chapter a little longer. Working on the next one! wait for it! 
> 
> Thank you for your kuddos. Hope the feedback ;)
> 
> ALSO
> 
> I took the part of the brain collapses and the reboot from a fanfic of Korrasami called "Frozen Pizza" . I just Loved that part xD


	10. It's Over

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Harley felt confused, and spending a afternoon with Jay, just made her realice that the mess in her life needs to end.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi guys, Hope you like this chapter. IT was a little difficult, but it's ready! Also you may note other pairing that I Adore and I couldn't help but puting them in. See ya guys! I Hope reviews. Working on next chapter ;)

When Harley woke up that sunday morning she felt sore. Flashes of last night flew through her mind and all kind of feelings collided in her heart and mind. She couldn't exactly put a finger on each thing that happened last night. Her mind were still clouded for the sleepy hour. 

 

_ Ok, let's make a check list: _

 

  * __I hanged out with Pamela Last night__


  * _We went to the game and she hug me._


  * _We danced and have much fun._


  * _She told me what lily means and I’m almost 99% sure she was nervous about that._


  * _Yesterday was her birthday and she was happy for have spend it with me._


  * _I almost kissed her_



 

_ … _

 

_ HOLLY SHIT! I ALMOST KISSED HER!!! _

 

Her brain seemed to react at last and her chest started to beat hard instantly.  _ I think I’m going to pass out from cardiac arrhythmia if I keep giving my heart this kind of twist. _

 

She stared blankly at the ground, collecting every feeling that rushed at the same time. She felt confused. More than that, all her mind is a messy place. Knowing that Pamela makes her feel something so deep and strong, and that she is sure by now that Pam feels the same about her, made her chest flew out of her body. She feels like she was falling and now she can fly. She feels indestructible, powerful, secure, and at the same time so vulnerable and fragile. Like her chest were on fire and warm every fiber of her body. But that fire is starting to consuming her. Filling her being and throwing any barrier that she could have built. 

 

This scared her… she’s scared to feeling all this for a person. For a woman… Sure, she had felt attracted to them before, but just as something natural. She always had thought that anyone can love other people, not caring gender, just being the person itself. However, she mostly had felt attracted to men before so this new discovery brings some insecurity on her. 

 

_Could I just… being curious?_ But an instant reminder of all that Pamela makes her felt dispersed that thought. _No, I know that there’s… something that I feel for her. Something STRONG. And she feel it too, I know she does. GOD I have always known it. The way she looks at me, speaks, laughs… and I know I do the same._ Suddenly realization hit her and the fear insider her increased. _Was she expecting on me to do something?_ _Was she trying to do something on me? Does she want to make a move on me? If it is, Why she hasn’t done it? Maybe she thinks I’m not really interested or..._

 

Her thought were interrupted when she heard something out the bedroom. It seemed like steps approaching her. She felt a little of uncertainty for a moment, but when the door opened and she could see the person outside, and her fear became panic.

 

“Hey sweetie! Good morning” A grining man standing at the door frame with a tray full of breakfast came and joined a puzzled Harley on the bed. He leaned forward a placed a quick peck on her lips, making her break free of her shock.

 

“H-heey yourself. What are you doing here so early? I thought you’re coming this night!” She tried to mask the disappointment in her voice. She didn’t expect Jay right now, and with all she had on mind, his presence is not good. 

 

_ That’s it. The reason she hasn't made a move on me and maybe she would never do. _

_ You are a married woman Harley… and he’s your husband. _

 

“Well, There were some troubles with one of my co-workers family and we all needed to return before the expected. I just arrived here in fact, but I didn’t wanted to woke you ” He explained as handed her some bread with jam. She chewed in silence, trying to calm her thoughts and focus on him. “So, since I’m here, What do you think about us to eat outside and ride for the park? I’m wonna made it up for you for yesterday.”

 

She could hear the hopefully in his voice and it almost broke her, knowing that her heart is calling for someone else, someone that she shouldn't be calling for.

 

“S-sure. You don’t have to, really. But alright, it would be fun” She smiled at him, trying her best for showing excitement at the plan. They finished breakfast and Harley made her way to the bathroom to get clean while Jay spoke to her.

 

“Oh, Harls. What’s with the Lilies?” He yell from the Kitchen.

 

Harley Froze. Her heart felt like ice and cold started running through her body. 

 

_ He knows... He knows. _

_ No, get it together Harl. Why should he knows? _

 

_ “ _ W-whan are you talking about?...” she stuttered and tried to sound as casual as possible. Her heart was pounding for fear and anticipation for whatever was coming on. 

 

“The Lilies. The ones here.” He came chucking to the room again to face Harley. “Where do you get them?” He asked smiling and curious.  

 

“Oh, these…” She let out the breath she didn’t know she was holding and smiled back. “Pam gave it to me last night. They… were about to fade so she decided to bring them to us” She specified the US word and felt relieved when Jay beamed.

 

“Oh how lovely! She’s so sweet. Did you guys get fun last night?” He asked approaching her and enveloped her in a warm hug, resting his chin on the top of her head.

 

She swallowed hard feeling the guilty pang in her chest thinking about last night events. 

“Yeah, we do. In fact, it was Pamela’s birthday so she seemed happy about it” .

“Really? Woow, that was awesome. I’m glad you get to know each other better. I bet she would be closer to you faster than you think.” He finished with a little peck on her head and realizes her. Walking to the kitchen again.

 

Harley just stayed there, feeling how guilt and confusion filled her heart.   _ She IS getting closer than you think... _

 

____

 

They arrived to a small coffee in the middle of the city. It was small but very comfy. Perfect to spend a Sunday noon. However, Harley had been quiet and a little distant from her usual self,  thinking about her feelings and trying so hard to be rational on them.

 

_ C’mon Harls. Get it together. You need to stop doing this. Yeah, you’ve been claiming for this since you met her but, it just seemed so distant, so impossible…  Now that it’s real, you know you can’t handle this. This is wrong. You’re a Married woman, with a super cute and sweet husband. You can’t do this to him. You just need to push that feelings… yeah, push them out, and everything is going to be alright. You could return to old times.  _

 

While Jay ordered their drinks she wandered her gaze around the place in search for a free table. When she spotted one near the window, she approached it to sit. The place was quiet and many people were there chatting with friends or reading a book. It felt warm and made Harley’s mind to relax.

 

Her gaze traveled to other tables and she spotted two women chatting, about two tables from where she was sit. A tanned woman with short brown hair and blue eyes was grinning at a pale,Black haired and green eyed woman, who was giggling and smiling at her. They never break the eyes from the other and seemed so happy and comfortable speaking. She lowered her gaze to catch that their hands were clasped with the other. Light tumbs making small circles on the back of the tanned hand.  _ OMG they’re a couple!  _ It seemed like they were on a date or something, cause there was an obvious attraction emanating from them. The way they look at each other, like there's no one else but them here.  _ They’re so cute! They must be together for a while for being so lost.  _ She couldn’t help but smile. The scene itself was full of love and affection that were impossible not to do it. 

 

_ It must be beautiful. Being with someone you love and care and knowing that you mean the same from they. Because, that is love, right? _

 

She then remembered that time when they discussed how love was. She had described it how she feeled, but now she knows that there’s  _ more _ … there are feelings, sensations, and thoughts that couldn’t be described with words. 

 

_ She makes me feel so right, so good with myself. It’s like there’s a whole new world that I never realized it could exist. Could I… been falling for her? Like, really fall for someone? _

 

“Honey, you’re okey?”

 

She break the stare from the couple to see Jay standing next to her with two cups of coffee and a piece of cake. “Oh, yeah yeah. I was just...thinking”. He took a sit in front of her, blocking her view from the couple. She signed a little disappointed and took her drink and a sugar bag. She stared at the cake lost in thoughts.  _ Well, maybe all the sugar I need is here.  _ She wandered if her thought was an analogy or a statement. Jay seemed concerned and looked at her with a worried stare.

 

“Are you sure? You have been a little… distant last weeks. You’re not sick, aren’t you?”

 

“I’m fine. Really. Don't worry.” She concentrated her stare in the cup of coffee, avoiding the guilt that grown with that stared and taking a small sip of her cup. Jay seemed like he didn’t buy that and she decided to liger the mood again. “But tell me, What’s with that co-worker family? You said something happened with them and all of you decided to came back.It was something wrong?” She pushed the subject and Jay seemed to understand the change for good. 

 

“Yeah, do you remember Rob? That nice guy we went to dinner with a while ago” She noded in approval.“Well his wife, you know her, she was a nice girl. Cared, polite, lovely…” Harley keep taking sips from her coffee and listening carefully. She remember her, for sure, they seemed like a real lovely couple.”When we were there he received a call from her, telling him she couldn't take it anymore and she confessed she had cheated on him!” Harley almost split her Coffee on his face and began to cough. 

 

“Wh-whaaaat?” Was all she could form between coughs. That was something she hadn't expected, and THAT really doesn’t help in her situation. 

 

“Yeah, that was my reaction too. They seemed so happy. I Mean, How could she done that to him? He is a good guy. He definitely didn’t deserved that. And she even tell him that she will not abandon him. How could you cheat on someone and still wanted to be at his side?”

 

“W-well… maybe she really wanted to stay. B-Because she nows he is a nice guy”

Harley felt dizzy. All her thoughts and the worst scenarios rushed in her mind at the same time. Her heart started pounding with fear. 

 

“Yeah but, that doesn’t change the fact she cheated. If you already are in love with someone else, then be with that person and leave the other. It’s hard and hurts but, You just can’t take both.” Harley was pale at this point. It was like all her fears were been throwing in her face. She rested her elbow on the table and placed her forehead on her hand. She was sweating cold and the guilt started to cloud her mind and sight.

 

A warm hand placed on her free hand and gave hers a light squeeze. “Hey, are you sure you're feeling right?” Somehow the warm in her hand seemed extrange. It didn’t feel right and comforting like other times. It felt heavy, and only made her skin to burn painfully.  _ It’s not the same touch. His hand felt different from hers... _ She slide gently her hand from his and waved it, taking deep breaths and calming herself.

 

“Yeah, yeah, I Told you, It just… My stomach felt a little delicate, that's all” She looked at him and he had a confused look and stared at her like he was putting pieces in places. It panicked for a second. “Wh-what?”

 

“Sweety…” He keep looking at her in disbelief and Her heart was ready to go out and run away from here. _He knows, he knows, he knows… Stupid Harley!, why did you take off your hand?, He’s your husband._ She swallowed hard trying to think in a safe leave. “ Are you pregnant?” 

 

Her eyes almost gone out of her head at how they were wide for the shock.  _ WHUTAF?... _

“Wha- NO! Of course I’m not” She hadn't expected that question and it take her off ward. 

 

“Well, You were were ager weeks ago and  that could explain how are you feeling and…” His voice trailed off, like Hesitant of continue.

 

“And what?  _ Fuck, congratulations Harl. This is what Your horny mode caused. _

 

“Nah, forget it…” He shaked his head and smiled. “Or…” He took a devilish smile and looked at her playfully “You wanna be?”

 

Harley chucked at this.  _ That was close…  _ “Sweety, we talked about this. Is not like I don’t want them, but… is too soon”.

 

“Yeah I know… but I really really want some. Just...think about it, okey? And better take care of you. You must be too stressed” She noded and finished their drinks. Her chest felt heavy.  _ This is wrong, I need to fix this for good.  For him.  _

 

_ ____ _

 

The rest of the afternoon they walked for the park. They mood had certainly lighter and they were laughing and enjoying the company. Hand in hand they saw the families and couples staring at the sky and night activities. It was easy to Harley to enjoy time with Jay, it always had been. Sometimes, seeing some couples, she couldn't help but thought in certain redhead, but she pushed that thoughts away and enjoyed the ride.

 

Once it was dark, they decided that it was time to go home, but Harley had other things in mind. She had felt so good that afternoon, being with him like old times and spend time like the couple they were, so she felt the mood for other… intimate things. She leaded him at a different zone on the park, mostly alone, in hopes that this could erase other thoughts.   _ I need to do this, I need to be bond with him again. _

 

They arrived to an alone place in the park, mostly dark and with no signs of people walking arround. She took Jay in a fierce and hungry kiss, tugging at his shirt and pulling him close. He was taken aback for the sudden change of mood, and just placed his hands on her hips.

 

“B-babe… we have a house, you know… where… we can do this… in peace” He said between kisses and trying to calm the hungry lips that assaulted his. 

 

“Yeah… but this…. Is more...exciting.” She whispered against his ear and nibble at his earlobe.  _ It doesn’t feel right. Why it doesn’t feel right?  _ She took his lower lip between her teeth and tug of it. Jay let out a throaty whimper and moan.  _ It’s not her voice. Why I want to hear her voice?.  _ Jay raised his hands and cupped her cheeks and Harley instantly flinched at the rough touch.  _ Her hands are softer, and warmer and WHY THE HELL I CAN’T STOP THINKING ABOUT HER!? _

 

_ C’mon Harl, you can do this. Just let you leave. You trust him, he’s your best friend! _

 

She slowly started to pull him at a near tree to pinned him there, but as they approached they hear a nice behind it and they instantly separated and went back.

 

“Who-who’s there?” She said, leaning at Jay’s Side, fearing it could be some kind of bad guys at this late hours.

“Oh, sorry… we’re coming” They hear a raspy female voice, and seconds later, a couple were peering behind the tree. She stared wide-eyed at them. They were the same couple of girls she had saw at the coffee. Their hair were a mess, their lipstick were smudged, mostly because the green eyed had put it all over the blue eyed girl and they had sheepishly smiles on their faces. 

 

“You… were?” Jay gesturing at the two woman, smiling in understanding.

 

“Yeah… you... were too?” one of them, the blue eyed and tanned skin asked, rubbing the back of her neck with one hand. The green eyed girl just giggled and tried to cover the flush on her face. 

 

“Yeah we… we tried to” Harley accepted and smiled too at the couple. They had happy smiles on her faces, and don’t seemed to mind that they were caught in the middle of a made out.

 

“He he, sorry to scared you. We just… couldn’t take our hands to ourselves” The green eyed girl grinned and took the hand of the shorter girl, stealing glances to the other. 

 

“Yeah, I see haha, We just, couldn't wait till home”

 

“Oh, so you live together?” The blue eyes asked excitedly.

 

“Yeah, we’re married, in fact” Jay smiled shyly. They seemed like teenagers being experimenting with themselves.

 

“Wooo, It must be great being married” The green eyed girl said and the other nodded “yeah… We just met yesterday and… look at ourselves” She grinned widely. That was the most happy and sincere gesture they could find in them.

 

Harley stayed agape. They just meet and they just lanced to the other? But they seemed so intimate before, like they had known for ages!   _ Yeah, you know that feeling… _

 

Even when she was smiling at the couple, she wasn’t in the mood anymore. They say goodbye to the couple and returned in an awkward silence to home. Jay were focused on the road and stealing glances at Harley, who stare was lost in the window. She felt confused, angry, guilty, sad… so many emotions that indicates her that her life is becoming a totally mess.  

 

_ That’s it… I need to stop this. NOW. _

 

_ ______ _

  
  


The sunlight of a new day is always refreshing and brings new hopes and expectations. It brings you the opportunity of change your life and decide new ways on it. Pamela know this, and as she opened the Flower Shop and harvest the front flowers she couldn't help but think in certain blonde than had been rounded in her mind all the weekend, not that she hadn’t been there before, but that afternoon and the almost kiss they share keep attached to her mind and heart.  _ If I had told her before that was my birthday, Would she had done something special for me? I mean, something MORE special than it was?  _

 

She smiled, so full of happiness like she knows she hasn’t been in long time. She had fell for Harley, that was sure. Not just because how beautiful the woman was, but how kind, funny and cute she could be. It brings in her feelings and faces of her that she didn’t know she could feel. With Harley she feels alive and now with a HUGE possibility that the blonde feels equal, her heart couldn't be more full of happiness. All her fears about doing something wrong dissolved when Harley tried to kiss her that night. The barrier she was afraid to cross is so thin now that she allowed herself to  wander in the possibilities. 

_ Maybe… she could be with me after all. _

 

As if Gods had heard her thoughts, she raised her gaze and saw the object of her desires crossing the street and walking towards her. Her smile grew wider and she finds beaming like an idiot at her sight.  _ I’m so in deep… so, SO deep.  _

“Harls…” She breathed happily but her smile slowly fade as the upset face of the blonde.

 

“No, no. you’re not happy to see me. I don’t want you to be happy to see me!” She said in a stern voice and rushed inside the shop. Pamela just gave her a confused face and turned to face her inside the shop.  _ Wtf..? _

 

“Okey…” She watched as the woman was fuming and walking across the shop.

 

“Okey. So…” Her voice was trembling and he face was a mixture of concern and stern. “I’m here because I don’t know what’s going on between…” She was walking back and forth in the room, facing everything but Pamela. “YOU make me FEEL something. Something that I Absolutely cannot feel.” She faced Pam for first and then she lowered her gaze. Pam kwen then when this is going to lead and started to feel the heaviness in her chest. “I’m MARRIED!... I’m married for GOD SAKE!... I have a husband. This… MAN. This lovely guy that…” She faced Pamela, and she raised her face too. “He’s done nothing wrong and I…I just...”She could see the worry and the fear in the blonde face and voice. She hears like she was at the verge of tears. It broke her heart and could just stare wide eyed at that watery blue eyes . She was about to say something when a customer enter in the shop.

 

“Hey, Hi!, I was hopping you can help me to pick a flower. It was for close rooms, no much sun…” As the man speaked, they never leave the starring on the other, almost as if they done that, they would broke apart forever.

 

Harley groaned in frustration and turned to enter more in the shop, finding the back door and rushed to it. Pamela tried to catch her, but the blonde moved too fast. She felt panic started to rise in her chest, and she took the first two  flowers she find and put them on the man hands. “This, This will get perfect. On the house.” She pushed the man outside the shop and him just stared agape, eyeing the woman and the plants. “Sorry, we’re closed” She locked the door and rushed towards the back room.

 

As she entered the room Harley’s face was shifted to one of decision and coolness. She face her straight and looked into her more confused green eyes.

 

“Okey so, you see. You need to see, I Can’t do this. I can’t actually do this. So whatever is or was, it needs to stop now. You understand?” The dead glare that Harley gives her made cold rush flow through her blood and she started to feel weak of the knees.  _ No...No please, don’t…  _ “It’s over” And that final words  crushed the rest of her broken heart.

 

She hardly registred how Haley passed by her and when she hear the door slammed shut she knew she was gone. She stared blankly at the ground and took small steps towards the armband of the stairs that leads to her department. She rested her arm and head on it trying to process what the hell just have happened.  _ What… what happened, why.. Why she said that, I…  _ her heart felt heavy and she could felt how tears started to fall and run through her cheeks.  _ It’s over… I have finally found something and now…  _

 

The sound of the door being wide open made her turn quickly, and all she could catch was watery sapphires and golden hair a few inches of her before hungry lips captured hers in a deep and desperate kiss.

 


	11. I belong to you

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Harley and Pamela couldn't denny her feeling anymore. They give into their desires, even when the know this is gonna to hurt people.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> SMUTH!! This chapter is a little... explicit, so you're warned. This was a little dificult to write, trying to lead it were I wanted, so I hope you like it!
> 
> We're near the final!!!

_ Please, please, don’t…. Don’t look me like that… Else, I won't be able to do this. _

 

Harley begged inside her mind as she stood in front of Pamela,  Straight face and looking how Pamela’s face degenerated in one of pure panic and how her green eyes were watering with tears ready to fall. 

 

“It’s over” She managed to say, trying her best to sound stern, even when her heart were screaming and being ripped in pieces. The heartbreak look on Pamela’s face was worst than she could have imagined. How the light escaped from her green eyes and a single tear slides for one of her cheeks. Her body seemed defeated and her face was a mixture of pure sadness and shock. Light tanned skin became pale in seconds and the quivering of her perfect parted lips made her look so vulnerable and fragile. In a few seconds, that powerful and strong woman became a bundle of mess.

 

She couldn’t resist it. She rushed to the door and refused to look other second the pain she had just caused to this woman. She closed the door and allowed her own tears to break free in silent sobs. She cupped her hands on her mount and shut her eyes close tight. Bending her body forward, she convulse, fighting to stay silent and stand. 

 

Her heart fell in pieces and felt how the breath was being drained from her body. It was like all her being had crashed and pain invaded her, feeling like demons were riping all the parts of her body at once.

 

A few seconds after she closed the door and before she collapsed completely, she hear something that was like a Sob and a painful whimper. Her eyes opened widely at the realization that was Pam who made that sound. 

 

_ Oh, shit. What Have I done? I hurt her. I hurt her so badly, She’s in pain. I hurt her. I hurt her… _

 

_ …. _

 

_ OH FUCK THIS! _

 

And with that determination she pushed the door wide open and rushed forward, watching how Pamela straightened from her bend position in the arm of the stairs and turned to her with puffy and bloodshot eyes. She couldn't take it any more. She cupped Pamela’s face with both hands and brought her lips together in a strong and desperate Kiss.

 

She kissed her hard, as if with that she could take all the pain she had just caused her. When soft lips started to kissing her back and warm hands snaked around her waist and dug on her back, she allowed more tears to flow free. Her lips tasted even better than she could had imagined. They are like heaven. Like some kind of drug that she knows She’s already addicted. She separated for brief seconds to catch some air and peppered her mouth and jaw with lovely quick kisses, each one like saying ‘I’m sorry, i’m sorry’ , before crashing their mouths together again. The sobs of both women just encourage them to keep going.

 

Pam’s brain was in shock. Moments before, this woman had broke her heart and now she is in her arms, devouring fiercely her lips and stealing everly breath in her lungs. Her heart was humming so furiously that her chest can barely contain it. She finally is testing those lips that had spent so many nights dreaming about. 

 

Harley placed one hand behind her head and pulled her closer, deepening the kiss, like she wanted to possess all of her, earning a deep moan from Pamela. It sounded almost primal, and Harley’s heart fluttered at that.  _ THAT’S the sound I wanted. The voice I desired. _

 

Pam hands were traveling along her back and bringing their bodies together, like they could merge by the action and never break apart. Pamela sucked at her bottom lip and nibbled lightly. This made Harley gasp and whit her mouth open, Pam took the opportunity to slip her tongue into it. She moaned in response and allowed the action, enjoying the sweet taste of mint and nectar.

 

They keep that fierce tempo until they felt their lungs burning, but neither wanted to separate from the other, feared that if they do, they would be waking up from some kind of cruel illusion into an even more cruel reality. At last, their body nature won and they broke apart just a few inches to allow the other to catch some air. Resting foreheads, eyes closed, touching noses, panting breath against each other months. They stayed like this while her breathing recovered the normal rhythm. 

 

Both women opened their eyes, and found nothing but such adoration and care in each other eyes, but there was something more there, something deep that burns behind their eyes. Pamela lowered her gaze and saw the trails of tears in Harley’s damp cheeks.

 

“Harley…” She breathed the word, swallowing quickly and trying to form more articulate sentences. “Harley, I… I’m sor-” Said blonde cutted her off with a chaste kiss, before planting lazy kisses there.

 

“Shh. Don’t… please.” She whispered, looking deep into those peridots that were darkened with pleasure and lust. It send a thrill through her spine and tightened her hands into Pamela’s hair. “Please, Pam… just…” She didn’t need to say more. Pamela catched the message, cause that was exactly what she wanted too.

 

She kissed her again and her hands lowered to Harley’s bottom, squeezing it before she placed her hands behind her thighs and lifted her. She instinctively wrapped her legs on her waist and snaked her arms on her neck, never breaking the contact and allowed the woman to carry her. Pam walked forward trying to press Harley to the wall and when she does, she hear the woman let a yelp inside her mount, so she quickly broke the kiss to check the woman.

 

“Wh-what… what’s wrong?” she panted, worry eyes at the surprised and hurried expression on the blonde face.

 

“Thorns…” Pamela looked confused. Her brain is still clouded with lust. “Thorns… in my butt” That's when she noticed the plants that were piled near the wall. There are roses and other kind of flowers with...well, thorns. 

 

“OH, Sorry. My bad” She quickly stepped back and started giggling and patting Harley’s bottom to remove them. Harley started laughing and so she does. They rested their forehead together and looked in each other's eyes, smiling and drinking in their closeness.

 

“Hey, do you think there’s a place here where my ass could be safe?” Harley mumbled and Pamela let out another laugh, resting her head on her neck and nuzzle it.   _ GOD this woman… _

 

“Yeah, sure there is” she mumbled into her neck, letting a quick peck there and rose her head to face her again. She was smiling and there’s no more sadness in her eyes. They were sparking like never before and Harley couldn't help but kiss her again, already missing the contact. The kiss was slow and tender, but it speedy in moments, cause all their previous foreplay had already made their bodies react. 

 

Pamela started carefully to climb the stairs to her apartment and when she finally entered there, they don't wasted much time to rush into the bedroom, occasionally slapping Harley in the near walls, making sure there were no plants in her butt this time. 

 

Once there, Harley drop from Pam embrace and quickly pinned her in the near wall. She returned to kiss her lips and Jaw while Pamela’s hands traveled along her back and cupped her backside again. While Harley keep  assaulting her neck with kisses, licks and small nibbling, Pam just tilted her head to the side, giving her more room in her neck. The taste was intoxicating, like all her body were emanating pheromones or something, but all her mind was processing right now only the salty taste of the redhead skin.  Harley’s hands tugged at her sweater and Pamela understood, so she removed it herself. Once she was in her tank top, Harley descended her hands through Pamela’s body and returned to her previous task on Pam’s neck. She cupped her breast and massage it so tenderly that Pamela only could moan and squeeze Harley’s bottom harder. It felt so perfect under her touch, like it was made for their hands to touch it naturally.

 

Pamela felt dizzy, all the emotions and sensations she is feeling right now were too overwhelming. She’s feeling how the heat of her body is raising and a familiar pulse between her legs is becoming more evident. When Harley bit at her pulse point and lick it, she knew she was close to loose control and let out a throaty groan. 

 

She then took harley’s wrist and inverted her positions, Harley’s back now on the wall and Pamela groaning almost above her. She was panting and her eyes were shut tightly, Harley was panting and leave small quick kisses along her jaw. Pam’s breath hitched and she let out a shaky breath. “If you keep doing that…” She swallowed hard and opened her eyes to look at Harley’s lidded ones. “I don’t think I Can be able to stop” Her stare was intense and her green eyes were almost filled with black. It was a glare that said ‘I could devour you right now’, but at the same time, they were like a plea. Like saying ‘If you don’t want to, say it now…’

 

Her heart warms at the woman sweetness nature. Even when she had started all this, she is still feared this for being real and consensual. Harley chuckled and tilted up to kiss her nose and brush her lips with hers “And who said I want you to stop?” she whispered in a sweet purr and took those amazing lips again. That was all the encourage Pam needed. She let go of her wrist and unbuttoned Harley’s shirt while Harley worked with her jeans. Once both clothes were tossed in the ground, Pam descended her lips from Harl’s to her neck, collar bones and the middle of her breast. Harley’s hands fisted into the maze of red hair and pulled her close. She was licking, nipping and sucking along her skin, and even when she was sure it would leave a mark, she doesn’t care. She want’s to show the world that this woman is hers as so she is. 

 

She unbuttoned Harley’s jeans and started to pull them down, but Harley’s hurried desire made her put them out to herself. Once her legs were free of clothes, they took each other faces and brought them together in a passionate kiss, tongues dancing, fighting for dominance. Harley Pushed Pam to the bed until it stopped with the back of her knees, so she sat on it and Harley straddled her, never breaking those tempting lips. 

 

Harley felt the tension that had been grown in the past weeks at the edge. She grinded her hips into Pam’s, and both let out a loud moan. The sound only made the wetness between her legs to increase. Even when both of them had their underwear, they could feel the heat of their centers.

 

“Harl…” Pam groaned has the blonde assaulted her neck and jaw with open mouth kisses and Harley understood her plea. She took the hem of Pamela’s tank and pulled her above her head, before going to unclasp her black lancy bra. When her task was complete she stared agape at the sight of beautiful, perfect large breast. Pam smirked at the wide eyed blonde. “Like what you see?” she breathed. It made her self conscious seeing the effect she had in the blonde. 

 

“I- I Just…” Harley felt suddenly too shy for being caught staring.  _ I'm gonna die here!!  _

 

“I'm just teasing, silly.” Pam chucked and caressed her cheek. “You’re just too cute” 

 

“And you are gorgeous” Harley said with the same gesture and with recovered confidence.  Pam’s hands traveled to the small of her back and baught her closer, kissing her clavelange and her still covered breast, while Harley keep her previous motion with her hips.

 

She felt how Pam hands rose to her upper back, and a second later, how her bra has been unclasped. There was something about the way the warm hands of the red headed felt against her skin that made her shiver, and made her whole body to burn… but there was something even more powerful in the way she kissed her, the way she look at her.. How she seemed to have all her senses focused on her, to wanted to posses all of her in every kiss, to tell all she felt thought those piercing green eyes… 

 

The wetness between her legs had become very obvious and the warm in her lower belly started to descend. Having this beautiful woman, grinding against her faster and harder every time, is making her mind cloudy and putting all her senses at limit. She grab Harley’s bottom and went backward into the bed, before rolling over and invert her positions, being on top of the blonde and between her legs. _This woman is just..._ _I can’t take it any more._ She scooted her to the middle of the bed and took the hem of her panties, sliding it down her legs and tossing it to the ground, making the same work with hers. 

 

They were totally naked now, each other admiring their flushed bodies. They drunk in their features: The light difference in their skin tones, Harley’s perky and pale breast, Pam’s toned legs and stomach, the small mole near harl’s belly button and the tiny freckles on the middle of Pamela’s upper breast and shoulders. They noted that both had a hidden tattoo on their bodies: Harley had a diamond, formed with three little diamonds red and black on her right side, and Pam had an Ivy vine along her left hip, crafted like watercolor. 

 

Pam looked again into those beautiful icy blue eyes, looking for any sign of doubt or fear. They had arrived to the not- return point. This is something she only dreamt could happen and her heart was pounding so hard and is yelling her to keep going and consume all those feelings that has been burning inside her since she first met Harley, but a part of her is still thinking this is some kind of hallucination, product of a fatal heartbreak and she needed to be completely sure this is real and that this woman, this cute, funny and beautiful woman is accepting her, and she won’t be waking up in her bed, alone and with her heart completely destroyed. 

 

Harley could see the fear and the gears running into the redheaded mind and she knew she was asking permission. She knows that this is what she wanted, that she wanted Pam to be hers and she to be Pam’s, and she needed to show her that.She extended her arms and hands, gesturing the redhead to get close. “Come here”. Pam complained and lowered her body, resting her elbows on each side of Harley and allowing the blonde arms to snake around her back, pulling her and resting  her head on the curve of her neck and lead a light kiss there. She breathed in her scent and her body relaxed instantly. The embrace was warm and comforting, sharing the heat their bodies emanated for being so close to the other. Skin to skin, hot breath on their necks and hearts beating against each other chest, feeling both of them as one. They knew instantly that this was what the other wants. That she wanted this as much as she does. She’s gonna give every fiber of her being to this woman.

 

Harley spread her legs widely, allowing the redhead to adjust her position and wrapping her legs around her waist. Her breath hitched when Pam aligned their centers and both let out a gasp at the contact of wet skin. From this moment, Harley’s brain stopped working completely and her body moved instinctively. She rolled her hips as Pamela started thrusting into her. Slow and deep at first. Savouring the moment. Enjoying the noises they were both doing for the pleasure. Her pace increased and the moans became louder and louder until it was an intense cry of her name. 

 

“Haarl…” Pam breathed for instinct. She felt on heaven and the noises that the blonde is doing is making her crazy. Her hips bucked frenetically and the mess between her legs is so intense that she can’t focus on nothing more that satisfy her.

 

“Yes!... oh Pam, keep it… don’t… don’t stop please.” She moaned like she had never before. Even when she had pictured this other times before, it feels even better having the real Pam with her, grinding, moaning and making her see stars behind her eyes. She felt how one of Pamela’s hands descended and placed between her bodies. Her fingertips started rubbing at the bundle of nerves there, and Harley jerked and lifted her hips at the touch. The wetness allowed her to descend and cares her folds. Rubbing up and down, while she keeped her rhythm with her hips. 

 

She dared to slide one finger inside, and the response was a loud moan and a grind against her hand. Encouraged by the sound, she slided other and started pumping in and out, curling her fingers deep inside and feeling how the warm walls clenched around her fingers. 

 

Harley’s nails dig into her back, her lashes fluttered in pure bliss. She felt how Pam started licking her neck and nibbling, and she grinded against her motions. The pleasure inside her is ready to explode and she is too desperate to realise that she didn’t care the damage she know is doing in the woman’s back. 

 

“Pam… I’m… please, Pammy…” The sweetness of her voice and the name were too much to bare.  She dig her teeth into her shoulder, and with a deep push of her hips and fingers, both reached the heaven. Fireworks exploded inside their bodies and both hearts stopped working in that moment. Their breath escaped and at throaty groan filled the room.

 

They hips kept moving slowly and erratically, both women enjoying their peak together. When they descended it, Pamela slipped her fingers out oh the woman, hearing a whimper in discomfort, and rested all her weight on Harley, and the blonde embraces her, enveloping her in trembling and sweaty arms. She adjusted her head on her chest and nuzzed her neck while Harley gave her a lazy kiss on ther head. They were panting, eyes closed and allowing their hearts to beat normally again. The sheets were a complete mess, their realises mixed with sweat along their legs are the prove of what had just happened.

 

They stayed like this for a while. A comfortable silence enveloped the room, just listening each other heartbeat. Harley’s fingertips traveled along the other woman’s back and her nose is buried in a maze of red hair, sparse and interlaced with her own in the bed. 

 

In some moment, has the hours passed, Pam had adjusted her position and laid on her side in the bed, hand resting in the woman hip and facing her, getting lost in her sparkling blue eyes. They were  shining like she had never seen before. They were filled with emotions she couldn't even describe. The light from her window, create a halo around her figure. Her golden hair, her slim figure and the pleasant smile on her lips were imprinted in her brain forever.

 

She knows that right now she had the same look on her face, cause Harley’s hand reached her face and caressed her cheek so tenderly that she closed her eyes and leaned into the touch. They say the eyes belonged to the one who made them shine. She understood that, from the moment she saw her, her eyes and heart belonged to Harley, and no one else. 

 

Harley felt drunk in Pamela’s presence. All her being is so intoxicating and warm, that she could stay like this forever, with this strong woman into her arms and drinking in her presence. When shinning peridots met hers, she almost forgot how to breath. They were warm and digging into the deepest of her soul. She knew this was not just one time thing. That they had shared something more precious there and give all of them. They don’t just have had sex. They had made  _ love _ for the first time.  

 

_ That’s it… This is love. I’m in love with Pamela. So deep and pure in love with her. _

 

Pamela’s hand cover hers and caressed her knuckles with her thumb. It was warm and comforting. Every part of her is saying those silent words.  _ I love you… i love you so much… _

 

_ “ _ What did you do to me?” Pam spoke softly, almost a whisper, in a roughty voice, due to being silent for several moments. Her gaze wandered for Harley’s face in total admiration and the blonde couldn't suppress the wide smile that this caused. 

 

“Well…” She took Pam hand in her own and brought her to her lips, giving it a tender a lovely kiss on the back of it. “I guess the same you did to me” She scooted closer and gave her a quick kiss on her nose. 

 

“I can't believe this actually happened. I… you were driving me crazy, you know that? From the moment I saw you…” She trailed off. The moment she saw her was a reminder of the real situation here. The one that put her in this moment without thinking about the consequences. 

 

“Yeah… same here actually. You said ‘As soon as your eyes meet…’ That was exactly what happened to us.” Her gaze lowered as a weight in her chest that she has been ignoring returned. “My wedding… I was supposed to be bonded with me man I choose to spend my life with. But the moment I saw you… My heart and soul attached to yours instead”  

 

A little silence enveloped them, knowing that they had betrayed the trust of a good man. They knew this was wrong, that people could get hurt if this happened but it was so much inside the other that they couldn't take it anymore. There was something too evident and too strong to hide it. They could have fool others, but not themselves. 

 

Pamela lowered her gaze, feeling ashamed for how things went. “Harl… I’m sorry. I’m so sorry for not being strong enough. I didn’t mean to-” She was silenced with a finger in her lips.

 

“Don’t you dare. Don’t you dare to apologize for this.” She said with a stern voice. “We both acted very… inappropriate to our condition. But this was not your fault. I would have run into you even if I wasn’t married or you would've ignored me. Even if it would have take me forever, I would have done anything, for this moment.” Pam listened carefully, but didn’t said anything. “I was scary too. I’m scary, but… I don’t regret any of this, even when I know this will be hard to Jay.” She took a shuddering breath before speaking again. “I’m gotta talk to him” Pam eyes widened. “I know I Need to… I Don't know how he would take it but… He’s my best friend. I can’t lie to him.” 

 

“Are you sure It would be okey? I don’t want you to lost him. This… Are you sure you… want this?... us? It’s a huge risk to take”. Harley looked at her with narrowed eyes, a little confused for her choice of words “I mean...I understand if you just… He’s a good man and I… I don’t want this to be one time thing, but if this is all I can get it’s okey. I don’t want to be the reason you lost someone important to you.” She said with broken voice. All this situation had make her a bundle of feelings. She never had been this sentimental before. She feels so vulnerable that it sick her. She loved this woman, but it made her sad think that this could be the closer they gotta be. Soft lips pressed into hers and made her relax a little bit.

 

“I don’t mind if Jay gets mad at me or stop talking to me. I’m gotta deal with it.” She whispered against her lips and rested her forehead with hers, looking straight to her eyes. “We’ll figure something out” She kissed her nose and Pam smiled.  _ We…  _

 

They stayed like this for other hours, enjoying the closeness and falling asleep in each other arms. Pam was the first on wake up, and smiled at the sight that receive her. Harley was resting her head on her arm and her own was wrapped around her waist. She looked so peaceful, even knowing the storm that was coming. She adjusted her position, trying not to disturb the sleeping beauty, and scooted off the bed. She gave her a peck on her cheek and harley stirred a little, cuddling in the blankets even more. She took her clothes from the floor and smiled at the sight of hers and Harley’s around the room. She lowered the stair to the cellar, It was past noon and needed to make sure everything was right in the flower shop. She heard some knocks from the front door. Maybe it was a client, after all, she had closed without putting the sign. She was about to open the door when the person outside spooke.

 

“Pam?...Pam, are you there?”

 

She freezes. It was like someone had submerged in a ice bucket, and suddenly she forgot how to breath.

 

_ Jay... _

 


	12. I Want you

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Is hard to wait for something you know might never happen, but is harder to give up when you know is everything you want.
> 
> Drama feels

“Pam, are you in the back?”

 

Pamela’s heart was on her throat.  _ Why is he here? Does he know that Harley came? Does he suspect something?  _ All the possible scenarios in her head run like a caos. She slowly opened the door to see a smiling men outside the store, waving.  She signed and tried to smile back while she approached the door.  _  I think he doesn’t know.  _

 

If there was a moment when she knows she's gonna face Jay, THIS IS NOT the best moment to. No right know.  _ How do you suppose to face and speak with a man whose wife is lying NAKED in your bed!? _

 

She took a shuddered breath and unlocked the door, opening and trying to look as casual as she manage. 

 

“Hey…” She greeted quietly as the man smiled at her. He was dressed formal, like he just came from work, but her face looked a little tired and if it wasn't for that bright smile, she could tell the man was exhausted. It’s strange seeing him at this hour. He is supposed to be working till night.

 

“Hey, yourself. The store was closed. I didn’t bother you, did I?” He asked, hopefully and Pam felt her heartbeat increase.  _ Well… _

 

“Oh, no… I-just… I was just...resting inside, I…”  _ Please, stop making a fool of yourself and show him your a brained human.   _ “I’m good. It’s okey. Humm… what’s up? What do you want here?”  She couldn't help sounded a bit rude and Jay just arched an eyebrow and chuckled.  _ Fuck… smooth Pamela, Smooth. _

 

“Well… I wanted to buy flowers?” He said simply and Pamela almost Facepalmed herself, but she just stared at him for a couple of seconds.

 

“Yeah, yeah...sorry. I’m a little... sleepy, that all.” they approached the different bouquets. She needed to get him out of there as fast as she could. 

 

“It’s Okay, don't worry. I just wanted to buy some flowers to my wife, Harley” That was like a arrow straight to her heart.  _ I bet if he had did it on purpose, I wouldn't have worked.  _ The reminder of that title only made her heart to clench and the unfamiliar feel of jealous appeared on her. It was like some kind of animal instinct: being possessive with their mates. And even when she knew that he is her husband, it didn’t stop her to feel that, after all, Harley has been hers just a few hours ago. Although, she smiled and tried to act like a normal human being would do. 

 

“Oh, right… well, what do you want? What does she likes?” She asked, trying to suppress the knot that is forming in her stomach.

 

Jay chucked. “Oh, you know what she likes” as if that was the most logical thing in the earth.   _ what?... _ Pamela stood frozen a couple of seconds and turned her face averting her eyes, a small but awkward silence filled the room. “Humm...Lilies, remember?”

 

“Oh yeah… sure.” she smiled and started to collect the flowers she would use in the bouquet, while Jay just wandered into the store.

 

“So… do you two had fun last saturday? She told me it was your birthday.” He asked and Pamela started to feel cold sweat running her body as her heart started to humming. 

 

“Y-yeah… that… that was fun. Thank you.” She had everything she has in self control to not go running away. She keep herself busy with the flowers and didn’t face him

 

“Oh, I’m glad. She has been a little stressed and… lost in thoughts last weeks and It’s so good you two are so close now. Harley had some troubles with new people, but with you is like she didn’t even need to build barriers like she usually do with others., ” Pamela could tell he was smiling, even when she was not facing him. The guilt racing inside her and she clenched her eyes tightly when her eyes started burning in signal she was being too emotional again.  _ God, he’s just too good. What have I done?. _

 

“It’s good to hear that. I found her… very nice too… she’s nice” She tried to sound the most controlled and nonchalantly she could. This is a very dangerous situation. She can’t be in the same room with him right now.

 

They stayed in silence for a couple of seconds. Pam finished the bouquet and handed it to Jay. who had a serious face, like he was thinking on something. He face her and his face, even when he had a warm smile and gentile factions, has an intense glare. “Pam, can I ask you something?”  

 

Suddenly, she started to feel panic. she swallowed the lump in her throat and just nodded, unsure of what would happen now.  _ Maybe he knows and he’s trying to make me say it or he’s just distracting me to punch me right now.   _ “S-sure… what’s up?

 

“When you and Harley hanged up, did you…” _ Oh fuck  “... _ noticed something strange on her?” Pamela blinked in surprise at the question. Jay had a shy look and he was chewing the inside of his check.

 

“Humm, no. I didn’t. She looked…” Pam heightened searching for kind words.  _ I couldn’t say him that we were like two lovebirds all night!  _ “She looked, fine. Relaxed. I think she was having fun” 

 

She thought that the words would cheer him up, but when his face fell and he let out a heavy sigh she knew it wasn’t the case. 

 

“Is good to know she was happy… Is just that...” He paused for a moment, like he was struggling with the words to trought them out. “I was just wondering if she… had said something to you… maybe about me… I just…” He let out another heavy sigh and he faced Pam. His usually sparking eyes were filled with sadness and fear. “I think I did something wrong, and now she's acting kind of… distant with me. I just want to know what it is so I can stop doing it and we… we could be like before.” His voice was trembling and Pamela just stared at him, being devoured alive with guilt.  _ You’re not guilty Jay. You’re innocent in all this mess. Just a victim. I’m so, so sorry. _

 

Pam swallowed hard. Her throat felt dry. She consider for a second, telling him the true right there and then and take all the responsibility of this. Or maybe forgot what had happened and keep her life like it was before. He didn’t deserved to being suffering this. But she decided against it. It wasn’t just her decision. It was Harley’s too. She heard a rumble and a crack in the back, maybe some cat that had been playing with the plants, but the sound was enough to bring Jay to his senses again. He chucked and put his smiling mask again, even when Pam know that is fake now.

 

“Anyway, I embarrassed you….and myself, but that kind of normal” he giggled and took a final sight, ready to get out his wallet. “Btw,The flowers are beautiful. How much is?”

 

“Oh. no. From the house.” She said quietly and he greeted her. He was starting to leave when she spoke again. “You know… You should ask her… Not me.” she said staring right at him. It wasn’t a challenging one, but one of empathy. 

 

Jay just smiled weakly and looked at the ground. “Bless you, but… I  could never ask herself if there’s something wrong… It’s… way too scary” 

 

“Why?”

 

There was a little pause, and he faced her again “ ...What if there is?” They both felt silent and he just waved her goodbye and step out the store. Her gaze followed him until he step into his car and drove away. 

 

_ What the hell am I going to do?... _

 

The sound of a window being opened and some things crashing alarmed her, and she rushed at the back door only to find an open window, cold air flowing inside and sound of steps outside. Her heart stopped in her throat when she figured it wasn’t a cat what she had heard before. _ Oh no… _

 

She rushed outside the store and looked along the street. A well known blonde woman was running away from her place and her heart was beating with fear again.  _ Oh good, No, please…  _  And she chase for her blonde girl. 

 

__________

 

She had woken up in Pamela’s bed happier than she had been in all her life. She had stretched herself between the sheets and snugged into the pillows. She took a deep breath and was drunk on the sweet scent all over the place: Pamela’s scent.  

She got up from bed and searched her clothes along the room and went in search of her lover.  _ My lover, uh?  _  She smiled to herself at the thought. She still couldn't believe she and Pamela had done this. She had came here with the intention of cut any chance with her, but she had never imagined that they would ended up naked in her bed instead. The memory of their encounter made her shiver. All the emotions they share when they give each other were overwhelming. She had never experienced this kind of connection before, aside from the physical pleasure. It was like their souls were dancing all along.  _ So this is what it feels? Being with someone you really love. _

 

She made her way to the kitchen only to find it empty. The same  with the bathroom and livingroom. She thought she would be in the store so she walked down the stairs when she heard voices in the front .  _ Maybe it’s a client. I thought she had closed the store.  _ She made her way to the door and froze for a moment when the voices became clearer and she recognized them.  _ Oh my God… Jay... _

__

 

_ You Stupid piece of shit! You’re a completely asshole! What have you done!?  _

 

Harley ran through the streets, She need to clean her mind and get away of the mess she had done. She had heard the conversation between Pam and Jay and she felt her heart crash in pieces. Why had she put them in this situation? Jay thinks there’s something wrong with him, when it’s the opposite. He is perfect has he is, but she is the one that had cheated on him. Even when she knows now that she haven’t love him, he is still her best friend, and it breaks her heart seeing all the pain she is causing him.

 

She had arrived to the park, and now her piece is slower, but her heart is still beating furiously into her chest.  _ What have you done Harl? What have you done? _ She does not regret what she had done with Pamela, but she regret how things went. If she had accepted her feeling earlier, she could have talked to Jay before, and maybe everything could have gone different.

 

“Harley!... Harley, wait” She heard Pamela yell at her, she sounded breathless, she should have followed her until now, but she could face her, and keep walking straight in the park. She is angry, not with pamela, but with herself. She had assured Pam she will deal with Jay, for her, but she wasn't expecting this situation exactly and how much it hurts her. Now she is dealing if she was lying  to Pam too.

 

“Harley, please Just Talk to me!” pamela said. Now she is closer she can hear the trembling of her voice. Her usual smooth and deep voice has been changed for a high pitched and nervous one.  _ You’re hurting her too, asshole!  _

 

“ What can I say? I heard him!. God, I lied him! And is destroying me that he’s blaming himself…” Her voice was cracked at the end. Pam could tell, even when she was not facing her that she is trying her best not to cry. It made her heart ache seeing what this situation is causing in Harley. It hurts seeing her like this, but what is hurting the most, is the fear that harley could regret what had happened between them. 

 

“W-we’ll figure something out, you’ll see how-” She couldn't finish because harley had stopped and turned to face her.  Her face was full of anger and her eyes were filled with tears ready to fall.

 

“How what?! How he’s going to feel worse and worse every day?, How I am going to crash the rest of his heart telling him I cheated on him just barely two months after our wedding? Eh? How I’m going embarrassing him when everybody knows his wife left him for a woman?” She hasn’t had the intention to yell at her, but all her fears are exploding inside her right now. She regretted it seeing the pain in Pam eyes. She knows she feels guilty, and she is not making it better with this. She let out a defeated sigh and looked at the ground. “It hurts Pammy. I didn’t think it would hurt this much seeing my best friend like this, that I’m the reason he’s in pain. I’m not even sure if I’m just a horrible person, letting someone else blaming himself for something that I don’t regret at all, or I’m just a coward,  being just too weak to face the consequences of my acts even when I told you I would. In fact I think I’m both” she murmurs, almost a whisper, but Pamela could hear her.

 

Pamela stared at her. She knows this is just too much for Harley, and even when she is now convinced what she have to do, she couldn't help to hang at the possibility that she is wrong. She NEEDS to know if that possibility is strong enough to cling to, so she spoke with her heart on her sleeve.

 

“You can… you can stop all of that from coming.” There was a pause where harley just chuckled darkly, totally unbelievable that there's a way where all of this won't end in pain. 

 

“Oh yeah?...and how do you advise me to do that, uh?” She is still not facing pamela. She knows it only would make the pain worse. 

 

“Tell me to go” Pamela said firmly. This is the last chance she have.

 

“What?” harley faced her shocked. She looks confused at her and Pamela’s face straightened more.

 

“Tell me to go” She repeats, her own heart is screaming her not to put her in this situation, but she needed to do this before she could decide anything else“Tell me that’s what you want, and you’ll never see me again”

 

Harley just stared at her, not believing what she is just saying.  _ Is she surrendering in this? After what had happened between us, she is just going to abandon me? “ _ Are you serious? You’re asking me to tell you to go, so you’re gonna be free of all of this? You can’t face the guilty but I do need to?” She started yelling again. She simply can’t understand this change in Pamela. She was hesitant about she breaking up with Jay.  _ Maybe she just wanted this to be one time thing?  _

 

“Oh come on, Harl! You know this is not like that!” Pamela huffed and threw her arms to the air. A really upset expression in her face. This was the first time She sees her like this. “There’s so much involved here and I’m just offering you the easiest exit off it. No faceing Jay, no breaking his heart or reputation and follow your normal life how it was supposed to go since you got married.” Pamela said sternly, as if it was the most logical answer.

 

“Oh… so you want me to jump in his arms, pretending this never happened and be happy ever after with him? it’s that what you want?” She stared at pamela, her own voice sounds broken. She can’t even think on what is Pamela planning to do. When she see the woman let out a defeated sigh and stared intensely at her, she could see those warm peridots that she love so much, cloud in sadness and something more…  _ desperation maybe? _

 

Pamela’s eyes watered and her strong facade crushed, her shoulders fall, showing like this was her last whisper. “I want YOU” her broken voice stunned Harley. “I want you. Only you to be mine and no one else. I want you to be with me, I want US…  but I knew this is going to be hard, GOD! I would be facing the same people you would. Jay, you family, your friends… there will be people against this and maybe some will give us their backs. We can lose people. Actually kind people because we hurt them… but I want to fight for it, I want to fight for the woman I fell in love with…” harley stared at her, lost in her words in awe, she could feel her tears rolling down her cheeks. 

 

“Pam…” She couldn't bring herself to say more. Her heart was bolting in joy for the confession but at the same time the ache increases, knowing that the woman is in so much pain.

 

“I know…” Pam averted her eyes, ashamed to had said that in this condition. She had planned to said those words in a much better and happier situation, but she knows this situation would never come. “ but I also know that if we fight for this it would break your world, you kind heart and soul, and I can’t stand that.” She stared at those watery blue eyes, she hates putting her in this situation, but she needs to be sure if this will worth the risk or not. “Unless you’re willing to risk all of that for us...tell me to go and I’ll keep my word.” 

 

Harley stared in silence for what seemed an eternity. She can't believe how quickly this situation had changed. She had made her decision when she had first kissed Pamela, she love her and she loves her back!, But now she understand the risk of it. She can deal with people get mad at her, avoid her, but not with broken hearts and she knows she would be breaking at last one heart with her decision. The issue here is that no matter what decision she took, she already had damaged both hearts. Jay’s for her betrayal, and Pamela’s because  even when she choose her, she always be blaming herself for making her break the other’s heart. Her mind was a mess.  She couldn’t put a finger on one thought exactly. She started breaking and a heavy and shaking sob leave her throat before she can help it.

 

Pamela saw how Harley’s lower lip started to tremble and she shut her eyes tightly, keeping her own tears to flow.  _ I knew it…   _ She stepped close the woman an enveloped her in a tight hug, feeling immediately slim arms wrapping around her and hands clenching in her back. The blonde nuzzed her neck and sobbed heavily. 

 

“Shhh. It's okey. I got it. It’s okay…” She swallowed the lump in her throat. This is breaking every piece of her mended heart, but if she wanted the best for harley, this is something she needs to do. They said is hard to wait for something you know might never happen, but is harder to give up when you know is everything you want. 

 

“Pam, I…. I Can’t…”Harley was sobbing uncontrollably in Pamela’s neck. Feeling the same scent  she had enjoyed less than an hour before. Now is a reminder of what she is going to lose. Her heart is pounding and she can swear she feels other ponding against her chest: Pamela’s heart. It is beating at the same erratic rhythm as hers. They were synchronized before, when they were making love, and they were dancing in an endless piece of love. Now they share the same broken tempo.

 

“I know…” She repeats, backing a little to face Harley. Her eyes matching the watery blue ones. “I’ll be okay… you’ll be okay” She assured her trying to form a weak smile but it ended in a mess. She rested her forehead against harley’s and both women closed their eyes, filling in the closeness of the other. “Just...Don’t forget me…” She whispered  near her cheek when she leave one last kiss there.

 

“I won’t remember anything else” She breathed feeling those were the most sincere words she had said in her entire life. There is no way she could ever forget Pamela. She ir hers and always would be. 

 

They stayed like this for a moment more, no one wanting to break this bond, but at last It was Pamela who broke the embrace and started to walk back,sliding her hands from Harley's back, to her forearms until they reach their hands, giving them a tight squeeze, before letting them go, all the way staying at the beautiful icy blue eyes that  froze and warm her heart. 

 

Before the tears betrayed her again she turned and walked away for the broken blonde, without watching back. She could hear footsteps, indicating that Harley had started to walk too, and as the sound become lower and lower she allowed hey tears to bust free.

__

 

When Pamela arriven to her apartment she could hear her cellphone rang. She had left it when she burst behind harley and seemed to have a few missing calls. She had calmed her sobbings already so she decided to answer. “Hello?”

 

 _“Dr. Isley, Thanks God you answer. I been trying to contact you for a while”_ It was her colleague from Boston’s Botanic University. “ _I need to discuss some issues from the investigation with you._ _Is it a bad moment?”_

  
Pamela let out a heavy sight. She had no head to this right now but she can’t deny her attention to them,after all, she still works with them.“No, no It’s okey. What’s happening?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I told you... Drama :c


	13. The unstoppable force

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Harley recives some resolve from someone unespected, and made her mind. Time is the real enemy in her plans.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I knoooow is been ages since I upload it, but believe me when I say my work is a bitch. Here's the upload, and this just leave us with one final chapter next. Its been really hard to write it, so hope you like it guys :)

As the cold breeze of the morning filled the streets, a few people in parks started their daily routines with exercise and running, getting ready for a day full of appointments and work. Certain Blonde seemed too eager in her routines. After spending a well half of hour in stretches and flexing, she was running along the lake in the middle of the park.

 

The following days from the encounter had been hard to Harley, say the less. Work had been demanding and her mood has been so erratic, serious and distant,  that no one could tell she was the same joyful person. For what is worse, Jay had been extremely busy with work, so they barely speak or interact the rest of the week. He could come home later than usual, and looking exhausted and even when he tried to keep smiling whatever he and Harley are together, she knows is only a mask, trying his best that their relationship won't get worst. She hadn’t spoke to him about what happened, but watching him so depressive is making her more and more hastened about it.

 

On the top, was the fact that she had broke any communication with Pamela, and that is something that is killing her more that nothing. Pam had kept her word. She hadn’t had try to contact her or even when she spoke with lucy, she did not ask for her. That hurts more.

 

She has been running and running this situation a thousand times in her head, and the more she thought about it, the more she knows she had made the worst mistake letting Pamela decide and go out her life. She knows she had fears, and Pamela had chose the “Less dangerous and hurting decision”, But it ended being a spike in her heart everytime she things on her _That is almost everytime, everyday… I wasn’t lying when I said I won’t remember anything but her…_ But now is too late for change minds. She had already hurt her enough, and if she really love her as much as Pamela does, she need to stop making her life that difficult and let her move on this… move on her. This is no longer for Jay, her family or anyone else… this is for Pamela, to let her keep going with her life, as she had done to her.

 

She stopped running for a moment, trying to collect her breath. She approached a bench rear her and took sit there, drinking a little of her bottle of water. As her breathing become normal again she was going more and more conscious where she is. The park, a perfect view of the lake there. This place has so much memories, happy and sad ones, that Harley seemed to always draw here. A few years ago this place was a reminder of happiness, joy and freedom. A few days ago it became a painful scenery where her heart was broke. _Why I always end messing the best things in my life?_

 

She must be lost in thoughts for a few time because she was taken aback when cat-like green eyes stared straight at her, a few inches of her face. She jolted back in the bench and her eyes focused on the short black haired woman standing in front of her, wearing sport clothes and sweating, like she was doing the same has her. “Hey. I didn’t mean to scare you, sorry” harley just blinked at the woman, still kind of shocked to see her. Se seemed to grew impatient so she arched a sculptured eyebrow at her, swinging her weight in one leg. “I’m Selina, remember?”

 

“Y-yeah. I remember you. Hey” She seemed to find her voice at last and gave the woman a weak smile.

“Can I?” she asked, gesturing the free space on the bench next to the blonde, who only nodded and scooted to the side, making her more space. She approached and plopped beside her, taking long drinks of her own bottle. Harley just stared at her, looking her movements. Last time she saw her was in the supermarket with Pam, and she seemed so bitter for a moment. This woman next to her, still with her fashionable style, looks a little more mundane. The woman turned to her, and her piercing eyes looked at her, like examination her face and condition, the same like a cat would do when it faces a strange, looking for danger or acceptation. “Hum, Are you okay?. You looked kind of Zoned out there”

 

“Oh, yeah...sorry. It was… nothing, really.” Harley assured her, trying to process the presence of this woman next to her. Certainly, she is not her favorite person in the world and she is conscious that it’s only because her jealousy, but now there’s no reason why she should be bitter with her. Selina just nodded and looked at the lake, and both women fell into an awkward silence. Harley decided to break the ice a little. “So humm… how you doing? I’ve never seen you here before”

 

“Oh, I’m usually not awake this hours. Mornings are evil, you know?” This make Harley snort and Salina to chuckle. “But uh…” She stretched herself with such grace that the blonde started to seriously consider this woman is half cat or something. “I won be able to come this afternoon, I need to help Ivy with...” The women seemed to froze when she named Pam, and Harley’s heart instantly hurt. “...Uhh, some things on the flower shop” Harley didn’t miss the change in Selina’s voice, almost uncertain if she should say something or not. She wandered if Pam had telled her something about what happened.

 

In fact, Selina felt stupid in that moment. She was surprised to have find the blonde here. She was aware that something had happened between her and her best friend, not exactly everything, but from the way Pam had called her some nights before, totally broken and in an unthinkable emotional state, like she had never seen her before, she could tell was something deep. Now, when she watched the woman, totally lost in thoughts and with that defeated appearance, nothing like that burning flame she irradiate the day they met, is not so much difficult to tell this woman is in a similar state.

 

“Oh.. T-that's great… humm. How is she doing?” She couldn’t help but ask for her. Is this is her only way she could know about her, she won't miss the opportunity.

 

“Well, you know her. That woman can’t keep her nose out of her laboratory. The patents on Boston had keep her busy and She barely have time  to even go to grocery. She hasn’t even open the flower shop all the week.” The black haired woman assured her, looking thru the park. “She needs to… get rid of some things so that’s why I’m going to help her” She faced the woman, hoping she hasn’t pushed too much information. She’s not the right one to tell about Pamela’s situation, but if her suspicions are right, this woman could be the one who can stop her.

_

_“You know you’re fooling yourself. This is not because you have work to do. It’s because you give up on the blonde and can’t face the fact that she allowed you to do it”_

 

_“IS IT cause I face that fact. She can’t fight this, so I gave her the easy escape. I need to do this. Please… just let me be and I’ll reward you when I see you again”_

___

 

“Oh… she’s always busy with all that univerity stuff, isn’t she? She’s so dedicated... and is great that she have you to help her. Is great having someone so close.” She couldn't help but feel a pang in her heart and lowered her head. Pamela is apparently okay, keeping her life and already moving over her faster than she would like to. Maybe this situation will help her friendship with Selina to grown even more and ... And here she was, almost totally numb to any situation except for that ones who involucral the gorgeous redhead. She knows she need to get rid of all this mess eventually and living the life she had choose to, but she still refuses to accept it. _How am I supposed to keep going if the only thing that I can’t get is the one I wish with all my heart?_

 

She heard a chuckle from the other woman and raised her face, and lanced a confused look at her.   _GOD, are you serious? Pity yourself?_ “I Think she’s far for Good, you know?” She turned to face the woman, who blinked a couple of times, clearly not knowing what she mean. _Man, this is annoying. Seems like I have to do all by myself._ “Oh God. Listen...You’re a Psychologist or something, aren’t you?”

 

“Psychiatrist” She corrected her and watched how the woman rolled her eyes lightly.

 

“Yeah, that… I’m not that stuff, but I don’t need to be one to know that something is wrong with someone who works compulsively. And I’m ignoring the fact that she’s a Workaholic with her ‘babies’ , But I have known her for ages, and this behavior is far different from herself.” she stared at the blonde, who seemed to understand where she is going. “I think we both know she’s more vulnerable and human than she want to admit… and needs people to help her stand again.”

 

-

_“I met this girl… she’s with someone else”_

 

_The redhead woman sobbed uncontrollably on the couch, her knees curled against her chest, facing the wall as the other woman rubbed her back. She already know which girl she was talking about, and wasn’t surprised at all how things developed between the two. What surprised was the fact that her friend is already so clingy with her, something she was sure never happened before. She ventured to form a question, a little rude maybe in this situation, but necessary to understand it. “And… does she love you?”_

 

_The woman faced her for a moment, after get a little lost in thoughts. “I don’t know..” She seemed to think about it and she frowned. “No…” She then faced her friend she had a warm smile and gaze. It melted and unlocked what her mind had keep for her own good. She nodded. Twise. She took a deep breath and faced the cell. “Yes…” She almost breathed, like it was something she had dreamed about and is in front of her to take it. “But it doesn’t matter…” She turned to face the wall again and rested her chin on her forearms._

 

_“Hey, I think it’s ALL that matters”_

 

_“She’s with someone else… she can’t, she…” She took a deep breath, trying to hold her tears to keep following. “W-when my dad abandon my mom, she… he broke her heart” she said in a broken voice, remembering how her mother had suffered because of her father._

 

_“Yeah, it may be, but… I knew her, remember? She was so happy and full of life years later.” She enveloped her friend in a tight hug as rubbed her back. “The heart… it mends again”_

_

 

Harley stared blankly at her, knowing the woman was right. She had spent this week dealing with her own demons, but somehow it hurts even more knowing Pamela is having a bad time too. She dropped her head, feeling guilty of what she’s doing with the woman. She wishes she could help this… she wishes Pam wasn't dealing with this.

 

“I wish I could have stop this…I wish I haven’t broke her heart “ She said in a broken voice. Defeat and resignation filled her as she fought to keep her tears.

 

“Do you regret it?..Would you rather never have to meet her?” Harley faced her again, confused by the sudden scenario. She thought for a moment before speaking again.

 

“Do you…” She started in a low voice. “Do you think that… I would be better if we… didn’t ever meet?” the fear in her voice was evident. She couldn’t judge her if she says ‘yes’, because Pam is her best friend after all, and she was the girl who had broke her.

 

Salina stared at the broke woman. She looked as miserable as Pam, and judging by the dark bags under her eyes, she knows she is. She let out a long sight before answer and looked at the lake again, searching the right words. “ I don’t know.” She frowned deep in thought. “I don’t know, really. We can’t tell how this would have happen or if you two would be better but, the only thing I know is that Pamela changed. She is different. I saw her humor went better  day by day. She smiled a lot more often and the kindness that was only allowed to a few of us, now was at reach to almost anyone. Even more clients had arrived because that. And after her birthday, she was shinning. I suspected what was happening before, but after that day, I figured out what was happening to her.” She put a hand on the shoulder of the now crying woman giving her a little squeeze. “And what you bring on her, is something I’m always be grateful. You shouldn't regret how things gone. And don’t blame yourself. I know Ivy doesn’t. “She cucked a little “You can’t keep everyone happy. Not everybody know what they even want to be happy!, but you’ll see... there are people who is happy just because you are too”.

 

She listen carefully the woman words. She felt as the heaviness in her heart is liger now. That words seemed to be the key to set her free and accept what had happen. To forgive herself. “Thank you… really. Thank you” She said with a watery smile. The first on the recent days. Selina returned the gesture and let the woman to recover.

 

____

 

Saying Harley was nervous was ridiculously poor. She was at an almost passing out mode. She paced along the living room, biting the nail of her thumb, trying to win the battle against her head about not doing this, but her heart is yelling so much that it's impossible to ignore it at this point.

 

_You can do this Harl. You need to do this. Just tell him the true, and whatever happens from now on, you will accept it. If he forgive you, good; If he leaves you, you gotta deal with it. You just need to accept what happened and be honest with him. You can’t lose another person in your life, even if he is not the love you’re begging for._

 

___

_You know… sometimes you need to let your heart go and share it with others. Otherway, you will regret it when you want to and it will be too late already._

___

 

No one would ever tell that Selina would be so helpful in her mind troubles. The woman certainly was a well listener and a deep thought person. No wonder why Pamela and her had matched so good. They were very mature and smart; Strong and undefeated.They could rule the world if they wanted to, and Harley could have felt inferior and tiny beside them, but this only encourage her to become stronger and wiser, to maybe one day, be and equal with this women.

 

Her heart and thoughts stopped in the second she heard the front door open, indicating Jay had arrived home. Yet when she hoped it would be a tired but happy ‘I’m home’ or ‘Hi sweetie’, she found a pouty and very tipsy Jay trying unsuccessfully to hang her jacket on the rack. He had this very concentrated gaze when his eyes tried to focus on her target and slight pout. A drunk Jay is not a very common view, but she always found him very cute. _Deam…_

 

She approaches him and removed the jacket from his hands. He instantly looked at her give her a goofy smile. “Thaaaaank you, dear. I think my eyes are tired” He chuckled and Harley had to fight the urge to roll her eyes at his clearly attempt to seem sober.

 

“Come on, you need to sit. I get you some water.” She said sternly. She’s not upset with him, but she’s worried. Is not common in him to get drunk. He has a good control on alcohol levels. Something must have happen to make him allow himself to be barely on foot.

 

“See? You’re always so sweet and cared. You’re the best friend/wife ever”

 

 _GREAT!... you just have to choose this day to lose your conscious, right?_ She thought as she filled a glass of water and handed it to him, standing beside the couch. He drank it with ease. Even in his semi conscious mode, he knew hot to prevent a hangover. After all, they want to be good tomorrow… at her birthday party. They had decided with her parents to have a meal in their house. A few friends and family, but certainly all Harley wanted to do, or see to be more accurate, is certain redhead spending it beside her. But she knows that would not happen.

 

“Thanksss Harl” he said with that goofy smile of him that make him seem like a child again...a drunk child. “You know...that's why I proposed you to marry me.” The statement stunned her for a moment. It took her with low ward. She stared at him, eyebrow raised, encouraging him to continue. “You’re so cared for other's sake… kind heart, smart, funny… You’re one of a kind!” She averted her gaze and fumbled with her fingers. This conversation felt awkward, and is not how she wanted to go before she talk to him. He let out a deep sight before her voice turned quiet and with a hint of sadness. “But… I guess I misread things, didn’t I?”

 

She stared at him wide eyed, and a pang in her heart made presence. She definitely didn’t expected that. _What is he …_

 

“W-What do you mean?...” She sat on the space next to him but with some distance. A deep frown now adorned her features.

 

“I mean… I-I think we took it wrong… this-”He gestured the space between them. ”I mean… it seems wrong some way.” He looked down, head ducked in a clear sign of defeat. “Is not exactly how I use to picture us in my head” he pouted a little while mumbling, but her expresion reminded thoughtful. Harley felt her heart sunk and instinctively reached for his hand.

 

“Hey...D-don’t say that…”She said in the carest tone she managed without breaking out. “We have known for ages and we’re always at each other side when we need it. Best friends and lo… a couple for so much time. It was natural we ended up marry. We’re a team, remember?” she said almost robotically, as she had told herself so many times before.

 

“Yeah… I know. It’s just…” He realised Harley’s hands and readjusted on the couch, laying on his side, a little curled himself, making harley to stand to give him space, but he remained in that place. “Sometimes I feel like something is missing. But not like it get lost, it’s more like… something that never has been here.” He whispered almost to himself as he closed his eyes, but harley had managed to hear him. Seems like drunk Jay is a lot braver to speak his feelings.

 

Harley felt her heartbeat increase with fear, anticipation and angst. She knows she can’t keep it anymore. He had put a comfortable scenario to talk about this, and she need to take the opportunity now. She walked a few steps forward, making some space between them, facing the window. _Okay Harl… now or never. For Jay… For Pam… For you._

 

“Jay, I… I need to talk to you. Is… something important” She started, and waited for any reaction. When she didn’t hear any, she turned slightly above her shoulder and Jay was staring sleepy at her. Alcohol started to get his conscious litte away. He catches her look and noded slowly, resting his head on the arm of the couch and mumblin what it seemed has a ‘ am listening’.

 

She took a deep breath, knowing she have to say this fast, but with all the carry she could manage. Her hands are sweating and she clasped her fingers together, trying to calm herself. “Well this… is something that happen. Something that I wasn’t looking for, but just… came and… and even when it’s over and… nothing is going to happen now, I just… I want to tell you case you need to. You deserve to know that…” She felt her throat get dry, and almost closed with emotion. She feel the tears starting to pick at the corner of her eyes, but she hold them. She need to keep going with this. Taking a deep breath, she let out that words that she had not allow herself to say out loud before.“ I fell for someone… I totally fell crazy in love for someone… someone that wasn’t you and…” She allowed a few tears to bust free, feeling relief on those sincere words, and feeling how her chest feel liger and tight at the same time. “ is tearing me apart that I couldn’t even help it. It just came but… now it doesn’t matter cause it’s over and I’m going to be with you, if you still-” She turned to face him and see his reaction, but what she found was a placed man laying on the couch with his eyes closed, and slow breathing, with a peaceful view on his face.

 

_Oh Jay, no._

 

She rushed to his side, trying to get him to consciousness again. “Jay, Jay please… no, don’t sleep now. Don’t do this to me, you need to wake up” Her voice was now broken with tears, desperation palpant in her whispered plea. “Please, you need to listen now cause I don’t know I could say it again”. She cupped his face and traced a thumb lovely along his cheek. His expression still as peaceful as before.  “You need to know that… I’m not going anywhere, okay?... And I won't leave you alone. You’re my best friend… and if that was enough before, It’s going to be now too.” She looked at him through blurry eyes, filled with tears. _He still have a chance to be happy._

 

She moved forward a placed a kiss on his forehead before starting to stand, but a gentle hand wrapped around her wrist and keep her in place. She lower her gaze wide eyed as warm amber eyes stared at her. Soft waze under thick and dark eyebrows. Examining her. She always liked his eyes. They looked like a wild animal, maybe a wolf that is keeping inside a cage, waiting always to bust free. Those eyes are staring at her, and behind them she could almost sense all the emotions that their owner is feeling right now. “Don’t do that” A husky and deep voice told her, that voice that she knows is mostly just for her. “I don’t want you to do this just for me” She stared at him, knowing now that he has been awake all the time, maybe just fighting to keep awake and become more conscious, like he seems now.

 

“Jay… I’m Sorry… I’m really, really sorry…” She couldn’t have fight the tears even if she had tried to. Drops fell on his face and he struggled to sit upright, She helped him to stand and once he was upright, she sit beside him, hands clasped and tightening with emotion. His thumbs rise to her face, wiping the trails of tears there.

 

“I know… and I’ve also known what happen to you” he faced a wide eyed harley, opening and closing her mouth trying to say something but her brain seemed to not be able to form coherent words. He chuckled at this. _Always so naive and cute._ “Harl, c’mon… I’m your best friend. I know you. I’ve watching you behavior, I’ve hear your sights and see you daydreaming... You’re in deep” He said with a teasing but sad smile. “And I know it wasn’t because of me, cause you never done that before. Your eyes never shine that way before, and even when you’re always shining, there were times when I could tell you were containing yourself with me… something you also never done”.

 

She lowered her gaze. Ashamed. Of course he have noticed. He’s a genius and can read her so perfectly that she is kicking herself for not consider it before. She felt other hand clasp above hers. It was warm, like all himself. Jay is like a constant fire that can warm an entire city if he would like it. It is an unspoken signal of comfort and acceptance.

 

“I really tried to stop it but-”Her sobs are keeping her for say more. She felt warm arms enveloped her and she lean into him, letting that security fill her again.

 

“Shh shh. I know… At first I don't know what was happening... I thinked you were mad at me or something”.

 

“I’ve never been mad at you!... there’s nothing wrong with you. Absolutely nothing. You’re perfect” She said in a rush, tightening her arms around him. She heard a light giggle rumbling in his chest.

 

“Flatter. But it took me a while to figure out what was happening. I was so confused and wanted to know the true...but I wanted you to tell me. I wanted to hear it from you, what was really happening. I think I feared the most you not telling me, that the true itself” He sensed her sobs had descended, so she pushed her back gently, facing each other. “I’m glad you  done it”

 

“How are you so… calm?... How are you taking this so good when I’m shaking and a bumbling mess? It’s not fair” She pouted and he let out a cheeky smile. Wiping her nose with his sleeve.

 

“Don’t get me wrong. It hurts… like hell”  he looked down for a second but it wasn’t for sadness or anger. It was for compression “ But I came to realize that it was something I’ve see coming, you know?. I realized that even when we were together, and spend so many time and feelings, I never sense our feelings were bonded. Not the way we thought althrout. Even when we got married I was hastened, and that time when you described how you thought love was… I found our feelings weren’t the same. You didn't feel the way I feel for you.” She listened in silence, allowing him to speak all those things that she was not aware of. “ It hurt… so much. And then you were so ager and clingy with me, and I thought your feelings started to change, but then I saw you distant with me and I thought I made mistake. I read you signals and I found that in fact you were in love… But it wasn’t with me. And even when at the moment it got me angry and depressive, I knew you fought against it… for me. And that hurt me even more”                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                     

 

“Jay I… I’m so sorry. I swear I didn’t mean to hurt you. I really really thought I loved you… no, screw that. I KNOW I love you, I just…” She trailed off, trying to find the correct words. She’s not even sure if he knows is Pamela who she had fallen for.

 

“Is not the same” She complete her, like always, reading her mind. “I know you love me… otherwise, you weren’t tell me this or even choose me above… the one you really love. I don’t want you to do that. Be with me just because you don't want to leave me alone. Is not going to kill me you know?” He cupped her face on both hands and looked straight to her eyes. Both of them glazy and full of emotion. This moment, is one of the most sincere and they are more connected than they had been. And hey both know it. “You’re my best friend, and I love you. I want you to be happy… most of all, I wanted to be the reason you’re happy. But if i’m not, then I have to let you find it. Because, what you’re feeling right now, is the unstoppable force… and that means I have to move” He finished, kissing her forehead and enveloped her in a tight hug. This is hard, and is hurting him. But his heart is not broken. Maybe, deep inside him, he knew that even when they destinies linked, and ran side by side, they never bonded.

 

“You’re just perfect, you knew that?” Harley mumbled inside his shoulder. She still can't believe how things are going. She always knew he has a kind Heart, and he wanted her to be happy, but her fear to lose him blinded her, and forgot that he was Jay… her best friend. Forever and ever. The most sweet and perfect man on earth and she is the most lucky woman for having him at her side. _How are you supposed to leave that kind of man? Well… love rules, and that’s the unstoppable force, that even him have to obey._

 

“I’m not complaining about you telling me. And like the perfect man I’m, I need to tell you…” He backed and looked at her again, using all the sincerity that is inside his body. “Reach your happy ending. Fight for it, as much as you fight to get this couch” They both laughed at this. It was his signal to her that everything is going to be alright. That they’ll figure it out how to clean this mess. Is not going to be easy. Their families are not going to be happy about this but… they’re a team. And teammates support each other.

 

They stayed like this for hours. She found that he was trying to speak to her about this for a while, and that's why he had ended drunk in the first place, to encourage him, has he said. That night, she found a peace she hadn't feel in a long looong time. She resolved her head  and heart, and was decided to fight for her happiness. She is going to fight for Pam. Maybe she won’t receive her with open arms, but she’s not going to give up this time.

 

_Just wait for me Pammy…_

 

____

 

“So… you’re doing this.”

 

“Yes. after one hundred times, my answer is not going to change, you know?” the redhead said as she closed the last one of her baggage. All her apartment is full of boxes were her laboratory equipment was.

“I still think you’re over reacting. Why aren’t you just go, cheek whatever problem they have and come back. Why are you going to move?” Selina questioned, a deep frown on her face. She had tried to convince her friend to stay, but she was so stubborn she didn't even flinch or consider her. She just hope Harley make a move soon, or this is going to end before it already start.

 

“I’m not moving. It’s just a couple of months till I’m sure the research is working good again. If everything is fine, I’ll came back before, a promise.” Pam sit on the couch next to her friend. She is leaving to Boston tomorrow. Her college had request her to check on the new labs. It must take her a couple of days, a week maybe, but she need time to clean her mind. This week has been too hard to her. Dark bags under her eyes are prove of her endless nights without sleep and crying. Her whole body feel broken and empty, as some flower that had been hide from water and sunshine. She’s just the ghost of what she used to be, after reaching her peak, she is now falling and falling, and she knows that the concrete is going to be hard. She had fallen from the cloud 9.

 

“Okay. Do what you need to, but...I think you should see her one more time.” She insisted, she knows Harley is the one that could make her stay here. She knows the promise of coming back is as true as she going to marry a billionaire playboy. Not today.

 

“There’s no point of that. Is the same I think about your botox thing. Painful and unnecessary.” She poked the full lips of her friend with her finger and sanded up, walking to the kitchen. It attempted to be a joke, but it ended being a pang in her heart. There’s really no point on talking with Harley. It just going to start the painful cycle again, and she was going to be the same she was here. Broken heart and broken soul.

 

She looked at the single lily on the window of the kitchen. The bouquet she maintained there and welcomed her everyday had faded day by day, till it only remained one. It was alive and fresh, like if everyday it refuses to die. She watched it, casting shadows with the moonlight that entered the house.

 

_No matter where or how many time life will get me… I’ll never stop loving you._

_ _

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TARAAAAAAAAAN!! Drama feels. I just want to say:
> 
> I want a Jay in my life! :c I was debating how he should react. Angry, sad, clingy, distant... all that posibilities, but I really though... It should be really, reaaaally hard to Harley to decide if she is leaving this kind of guy. Seriously, Could you?? So I decided to vote from the aweome and badass kind Jay. *Clasp* 
> 
> I also realised that I never descrived Jay phisicaly. Sorry about that. You can say now that at last he have dark hair and amber eyes :V
> 
> Hope you like it and I PROMISE the final will worth it ( I like to think that). As a plus, I've been doing a fanart of this ones, so I've been posting it at the last chapter :3
> 
> (ALright, there's a preview on this one :3)
> 
> Thank Your for your Kuddos and Coments :3


	14. Imagine me and you

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pamela is leaving and Harley won't let the love of her life to flight away from her. Not again.

Is well known that after the storm it comes the calm. But sometimes is just previous to the big one. The birthday reunion is calm and enjoyable. Some friends and family had come to visit them and the apartment is warm with all that people. Harley smiled at the sight. For once in a long time, she felt not alone and deep with her demons.

 

The guilt inside her chest becomes liger and liger every time she look across the room and see Jay smiling at her. It feel awkward somehow. They had made a deal about pretending the best they could today, and after that they will tell their families about their separation. It may sound awful, they will be separated not so long time they get married, but both know is the best. They will still have each other, and they will support the other to find happiness. Law could demand that they’re together as a couple, but they would find how to deal with that till the time of divorce arrives.   _I bet we‘ll be the crazy couple who seem happy in the process._ She still can’t believe how good things gone. She knew she had hurt Jay, but he showed be stronger and supportive. His Heart is the biggest one. If her fears hadn’t dominated her and she have told him the true before, well… so much mess have never occurred.

 

Everything seems lovely, but something is still missing. She had decided that this afternoon she’s going to see Pamela. She needs to tell her she can be with her. She want so be with her, forever and ever. She knows that maybe it won't be easy, and Pam would be upset and don’t want her to be there… but she is not retraction this time, She will fight… for the woman she had fallen in love with.

 

A ring on the door broke her thoughts and she hurried to open the door. What received her was a huge and beautiful bouquet of roses and lilies on her face, and her Heart stopped and frized for a second. A gasp leave her mouth as thousands of emotions collided inside her, and her chest hummed so strong that she could have swear everyone in the room could hear her. _It… it couldn’t be…_ But any idea she had formed in her brain banished ,has a smiling Bruce emerged behind the bouquet.

 

“Hey Harl. Happy birthday.” the smiling man gives her the bouquet and a friendly hug,which she tried her best to return and hide the big disappointment on her features and voice.

“T-thanks Bruce, how lovely.” She admired the flowers there. Red roses and lilies flowing all along and a single and huge white lily on the center was the final touch. All them enveloped in white paper and red ribbon.They are beautiful, full of life and in perfect balance. A master piece. “They are… absolutely beautiful”

“I know. Pam really did a wonderful job” As soon as the name leave his lips, Harley’s eyes almost pop out her head at how wide they were.

“S-She made them?... really?” The hope in her voice was too evident, but she didn't care. This is making her mind and heart flatter in ways she already had forgot they were capable of. _She remembered?_

“Yeah, who else?. I stop by the flower shop on my way here and I tell her they were for you. She gave them on the house and I think she even leave you a note. She apologized for not being here though”. He told her as watching how Jay had made his way to greet his friend. She slowly looked for said note, and found a delicate envelope inside. She took it look at her name on it, Delicate handwriting adorned it, so carefull, almost showing how much care it took to writh it. While the two friends talked with the other, she opened it to find a small card inside, the same handwriting that adorned outside, was placed there.

 

_“Hope you’re having a wonderful Birthday. You worth it._

_I Wish your life to be as this flowers:_

_To beauty and care surround you forever. My beloved one._

_Yours. Always. Forever”_

_-P_

 

Tears were flowing throw her cheeks before she could stop them and put a hand on her mouth to stop the following sobs. She still have a chance, she know it. Those beautiful words had ignited something inside her that she thought had faded. But she couldn’t help the feeling that something was wrong. Something on those words is alarming her, and angust is creeping in her chest.

 

“Harl, are you alright?” a gentle hand on her shoulder made her tilt up her gaze from the paper and find concerned amber eyes looking at her. She wiped her tears with the back of her hand and hide the note on her pocket.

“Y-yeah. I’m fine. It’s just… so sweet.” She smiled and he returned it. The flowers are really a sweet gift.

“Yeah, she put effort on it. Apparently it was the last flowers there.” When his two friends turned to him, he continued “She and a really gorgeous woman were putting boxes on a car. Seems like she was leaving and it’s going to be closed for some time.Is a shame.” Bruce said nonchalantly, but the shocked look on harley’s face told him that was something more serious. “Is something wrong?”

“S-she’s leaving?... are you sure?” she stutter with panic knotting her stomach. She was so shocked that she miss the sided look Jay gave her, examining her.

“Red is going on a trip” The three of them hear a little voice, behind them and found Lucy standing there, smiling.

“W-hat? How do you know that?” She crouched in front of her little sister. Her heart was on her throat and she feel like cold run through her veins.

“ ‘cause she call me yesterday. She was supposed to take me to the museum next week, but she told me she is leaving for a loong time, and she was not sure when she’s wanna come back. She said she’s bringing me a present when it happens” the little girl smiled and ran through the house again.

 

Harley stayed crouched. Froze in place as tears flowed from her eyes. There was a moment when she felt numb. Emptiness all over her head and heart. She could possibly pass for another forniture in the house. An then it clicked: _She is leaving…_

 

_What… what’s going on… why… She’s leaving… leaving…_

 

_I’m not going to see her (She’s leaving) , I won’t see her face, her eyes (She’s leaving), I won’t hear her voice or feel her skin, or take her scent...she still love me and… She’s leaving_

Her breathing is matching her heartbeat and she started to hyperventilate. She wanted to scream, to say something, but no sound is leaving her throat. _No… no please, no… No, no, no, don’t go._

 

“Harl. Harley, look at me” Jay took the trembling woman by the shoulders and turned her to him. Her gaze was lost and her face was wet with all the tears that can’t stop to flow. It was the pure representation of horror and shock. Jay worried expression changed to one of realization. Watching her wife in such state at this notice, should mean something only. _Could it be…?_ “Harley. Harleen!” He took the blonde face in his hands, cupping her cheeks and forced her to look hit at the eye. The sound of her real name bring harley to her senses and focused her gaze on Jay. Her heartbeat and breath calmed when she stared at his look. He had an intense gaze. One that is telling her He had realized something. “Is Pam, isn’t she?” his voice was something between amaze and and strange feeling, a hint of what Harl could only describe as… _joy?_

 

She stared at him. There’s no point on deny it now, so she nodded and prepared herself for some kind of angry/sad/complain comment, but instead Jay eyes widened, looked to the side and his mouth open slightly, before turned into… _is that a smile? Is he beaming??_ He turned again with her with an arched eyebrow and his lips pursed tightly, trying his best to suppress a smirk. He failed. The knowing face he gave her brought Harley back from whatever limbo she was, and a huge and deep flush covered her face and neck. _OMG! REALLY?? Are you seriously tasing me right now???_

 

The death glare she gave him make him clean his throat, trying to regain his composure as supportive husband/friend, but that Shitty best friend inside him was laughing so hard right now. _DEAM, this is the best, for sure._ “Right...humm. Hey, it’s okay, calm down”.

 

“No, is not okay” She said in a rough and defeated voice. She looked straight to his eyes, showing her pain and plea. “She’s leaving… I lost her…” Her voice cracked at the end and her chest clenched again at the thought. She tried to lower her head, but the grip on her face remained her in place.

“No. She’s not gone yet. You didn’t lost her. Bruce said she was packing, you still have time to chase her.” He told her and released his grip, taking her forearms and standing her. He wiped her eyes, while she was taken aback.

“W-whaat?, what are you-”

“What you hear, now GO and chase her.”

“Jay…” She stared dumbfounded at him. Her chest is swelling and a light piece of hope increased inside her. “But, what about-” She gestured to the people and family there. They are their guest after all, and is her birthday… _Hell, is my birthday!_

“I’ll take care of this. Now… go for you fairy tale” He said with a confident smile. She was not sure how to take his reaction. _What with that enthusiasm? Is a mask or the notice is really so joyful to him?_ She could think later on that. She beamed and noded eagerly before giving him a tight hug. She turned to a puzzled Bruce, full confidence on her face.

“I need your car” she commanded and almost chuckled at the wide eyed men there, totally out of clue what the hell is going on.

“Uuuh, sure.” He took out his keys to be instantly taken by the blonde and a fast ‘thank you’. His hand froze in place at the hurried action. “‘...Welcome?.Just be, careful?” he blinked a couple of times as Harley run outside the apartment. “Did she… just forgot you guys have your own car?” He asked to his friend who only laughed joyful.

“I think so. Leave her, she’s just too excited. C’mon, I need your help too” Jay said and dragged his friend to the kitchen.

“What?, you need my house too?”

“Not yet.” He joked “Did you still have your influences on the airport?”

____

 

“Remember, call me whatever you need help with this. I don’t want you to burn this place” Said the redhead with a chuckle as she hugged goodbye at her friend.

“Ha-ha. Im making no promises.” Selina smiled at her. “You just must come back soon before that happens” She teased her, getting a rolleye from the woman.

“Yeah yeah. I’ll try” She smiled and looked at the flowershop...well, just the shop now. All the specimens had been selled or translated, so they wouldn’t fade in her absence. It looks so empty. When she opened this place for the first time she was full of joy and hope. Now she needs to be filled again before she could open again. “Well, I should get going. Take care of yourself” She looked at her friend one more time before walk backside to the door.

 

“YOU take care. I’ll get fun.” She smirked and chuckled, but then her expression turned a little more stern and her friend faced her expectantly “Hey… You did nothing wrong” Pamela needs to get rid of her own guilt, and assuring her that statement is the first step. Pam just smiled weakly with sad but strong features.

 

“Yeah, I did… but the worst part is that I would do it again” She said before smiling again and got out the shop, climbing in the taxi heading to the airport. She waved goodbye to Selina as the taxi turned the corner. Once she was out of view, she allowed a new pair of tears that had been holded all the time there, to bust free, only to be wiped instantly. Taking a deep breath she tried to calm herself.

 

She knows she is being a coward… something she has never been. She always has been known to be brave, independent, strong… a very capable woman who can stand on her own and could rule the world if she even want it. That is Dr. Pamela L. Isley. The woman she had spent so many years of work and dedication on build. This… weak and broken woman, Is totally strange to her. This woman is emotional and is scared. This is not exactly how she had pictured herself.

 

In Pamela Isley’s life there was never room to emotion or weakness. Sure, is not like she had not tried before. There were be others in her life before, but just the superficial one. With the doctor, with the gorgeous and smart woman. She knew none of these ever reach deeper than that, and she never allowed it. They didn’t worth it. Now, the only time she had really allowed someone, aside from friendship, to reach inside her, to let herself believe there was someone who really wanted to love her, and own that vacancy inside her heart… is over. The first time she really took a risk with her heart, she lose. And the worst part of it, is that she was sure she is ruined with other people. Harley had just stole that piece of her, and she will never realise it. She is the owner of her heart now, and if she is going to live like this, then she need to be Pamela Isley again. The strong one. In this moments she is just… Pam. The poor florist who's totally crazy in love with a girl. A girl who loves her. A girl who had fallen completely with her… a married girl, with a wonderful man. And that’s it. She had lost the woman she loves, against the only man she could tell adores her the way she deserve. She had crashed with an unmovable object, and her force needed to stop.

___

 

_“Harleen Frances Quinzel, what the heck were you thinking!?”_

 

She could hear her mother in the speaker. She was driving frenetically thought the traffic in the city. As she had rushed from the apartment without advice, it was predicted that her family should worry, so Jay had explained, just barely, why she had run full speed. Her mother was the first on react, but again, she seemed more amazed than angry. _Did she really was so worried for nothing??_

“Mom, I told you! I need to reach her!” She yelled as she approached Pamela’s street.

 _“I know! But all of this is just so fast. You barely know her a few months ago, How do you know she’s the right?”_ Her mother had a point. She only knew pamela since her wedding day, but she already knew the answer to that. She smirked when she spotted the flower shop.

“I knew it in 3 seconds”

Harley has never been a prodigious driver. In fact, everyone prefers to drive instead of her, so when she arrived and miraculously parked the car in full speed she attracted many views, but she didn't care and rushed out the car and into the shop.

 

The door flew open and she looked around it. Empty. No signs of any life being except for the liger scent of the previous flowers there. She heard hurried steps descend the stairs behind the backdoor and her heart stopped for a second. The door opened, revealing a wide eyed Selina with baseball bat in hand.

“Where’s Pam?” was the first thing that came out from harley’s mouth, and that seemed to bring the other woman in her senses. She lowered the bat and exhaled deeply.

“What the hell is your problem?. Could you try that introduccion again?” She said angrily, bringing her hand to her chest. She had clearly scared her. Harley’s cheeks reddened at her abrupt action.

“Huum...Hi?, Is Pamela here?” She said in a calmer voice, but her body language is showing how impatient she really was.

“Wow, you’re really slow, you know?. No, she’s not.  she already leave. She…” Selina trailed off, watching the defeated expression on the blonde. “You knew she was leaving, right?” Harley slumped her shoulders and nodded. Still trying to not fall on a more desperate state.

“I need to reach her. Selina, I have to reach her.” The pleaded tone she used to the woman made her heart clench.

“And what would you do if you reach her?... You’re married. If she came back, what would change?” Her tone sounded more acquisitive than she had attempted, but she couldn’t help it. Truth is, Ivy has suffer for her, and there’s no guarantee that it won't happen again.

“Everything change. I… I left my husband. Well he leave me. Well we both speak and-” She shocked her head knowing she was babbling “The point is! I’m free now… and I don’t want to lose her again.” She looked at the blackhaired woman with determined face.

Selina studied her for a few seconds, realization appearing on her face. “So… you’re free. And you, Love Ivy?” She asked, raising an eyebrow, her gaze showing hints of hope. The blonde just nodded, and the huge grin that appeared in Selina’s face almost broke her. She lowered the bat, took her purse and gestured the woman to follow her. “Alright!, Let's go!”

___

 

Pamela signed heavily. Her package has been checked, and now she was waiting her board in a coffee inside the airport. She clicked her nails on the cup in a fast pace, and her leg was bumping uncontrollably. She is nervous, but not because the flight. She was doubting, and that is bad. She clenched her eyes, trying to remember herself why she is doing this.

 

_You can do it Pam, You have to. There’s no reason why you should stay here now. If you stay, you probably will see her, with jay. She is not coming back to you. She won’t. You need to move on...Why is so hard to resignate? Why I can’t stop thinking about her?...What if I tell her I’m going? Would she miss me? Would she come to me? She could chose me, Just give her time to ...No, no she can’t. We can’t. This is wrong. Stop this Pamela._

She keep her inner battle, taking deep and slow breaths, trying to gain valor.

 

Harley and Selina ruched through the door on a very busy and noisy airport. They looked  to the sides, looking for some sign of the redhead. Nothing. They had rushed here, but they didn’t even know which door or flight they should approach. They only knew the hour. 20 min. In 20 minutes the passengers should take the bouard door, and they need to find her before that happens. They run through different airlines searching for matching times, but they couldn’t find her.

“Not that I’m judging your logic, but did you thinked on try to call her?” Selina asked, feeling how their time is running and still no sign of her friend.

“Of course I think about it. Is pretty obvious she won’t answer if she knows my number” the blonde huffed, already knowing she had descarted that possibility, but instantly lighten up a new one. “Of course! Gimme your phone” Selina obliged instantly. Pam certainly is gonna answer her if she thinks is Selina who’s calling her. Right know, both feel pretty stupid for not thinked it before. While Harley pressed the call button, her heart started to beat in anticipation. Suddenly she’s feeling so nervous. She didn't even think on what or how she is going to talk to her. _What should I say? Should I tell her I’m here? First I need to know if she hadn’t board yet. What if she-_

 

_“Have you burned my place already? That was pretty fast, you know?”_

And she gone mute. Harley froze, hearing that melodic and sweet voice for the first time in a week, but seemed like it had been ages since the last time she hear her. It quickened her heartbeat and melted every inch on her body. _GOD how I missed that sound, sooo much._

 

Pamela stopped walking outside the coffee, ready to lead into the broad stage. Is strange that Selina hasn’t replied with a bitter objection. No reply at all. “Selina?, I swear if you done something whi-”

 _“Pam…”_ And that was Pamela’s turn to froze. That light and sparkling voice she loved so much, but certainly, she didn’t expected.

“H-Harley…?” Her heart was humming in her chest, and her hands feel sweaty and cold. She cupped both hands on her phone and brought it closer to her ear, trying to figure if her voice was real, or it was just her messed mind that is playing with her.

 _“Pam, please j-just… listen to me”_ she could hear a deep sight on the other side. _”Don’t go. Please, if you just let me explain-”_ Something clicked inside her mind. If it’s harley on Selina’s phone, so they are together. _How is they are suddenly friends? Selina… she must have say her. She told her to call me._ And a huge ache in her chest crashed those little sparkles of hope that had been forming.

“Stop it” She said and the line gone mute again. She keep silent for a moment too. Taking deep breaths. Her brain was overworking and she could swear she could see the gears working inside it. _Why is she calling me? Is it just because Selina asked her for, or did she really wanted to? Why would she wanted me to stay? We can’t be like this forever._

Harley just waited for her to calm. She could hear some noises. People walking, talking, the air speakers, music on the background. She could almost identify the songs someone was singing as they passed near the woman ( _‘_ _Imagine me and you, I do. I think about you day and night’_...)   _how opportune time you chose, buddy..._ Her senses were at limit. Fear and hope are colliding inside her, and is making every second the woman is taking to speak an agony.

“Just… stop it, Harley. We both know you can’t do this. It’s over.” Her broken voice betrayed her, and she lowered her phone when she hear the beginning of a replay from the blonde and ended the call. She took a minute to close her eyes and compose herself, before heading to the board zone.

 

Harley let out a deep sigh and handed the phone to the other woman. She swallowed the lump in her throat, trying not to cry now when she feel a hand on her shoulder. She turned to see concerned green eyes, looking at her. “Hey… she will come back soon. You two could talk then.”

 

“No…” said the blonde defeated tone. She lowered her gaze and clenched her eyes. It’s almost time, Pamela should be boarding now, and she have no time to find her. Selina gave her a squeeze. They had tried, but it’s almost impossible to find her at this point. All she could hope now is Ivy to return as soon as she can, so they can speak then.

 

“Let’s get you a coffee,uh? Everything is going to be alright. Come on” She started walking to a coffee near them. Harley remained in place, still trying to find some way to stop Pam.

 _(‘_ _I can't see me lovin' nobody but you for all my life’)_

Harley’s eyes snapped open. She looked how a man with headphones passed by her, singing like there were nobody there but he. _(‘When you're with me, baby, the skies will be blue for all my life’)._ She followed the man with her gaze, and turned her head in direccion where he came from. Realization hit her, and a huge grin appeared on her face.

Selina turned to see if the woman was following her, and when she see the beamed face, she arched an eyebrow at her. “Hey, are you okay?”

“I’ve hear that song before…” Harley beamed like an idiot and looked to her sides, finding an empty chair and without a second thought she climbed it, not bothering the odd looks she was gaining. _She’s near here!_

“PAM!!... PAM!... PAMELA, PLEASE!” she tried to scream, but the place was so noisy that only people who were a few feets from her could her her. “PAAAAM!!” No effect. She is gonna lose her last chance if she don’t make something now. She placed her hands on her stomach, closed her eyes and tightened her muscles. Taking a deep breath, she allowed the reminder of warm hands above hers and hot breath on her cheek to envelope her.

“YOU’RE A WANKER, NUMBER 9!”

A powerful sound filled the hall and runs along it till it reached the ears of certain redhead, who was standing on a file, ready to board her flight. Her eyes widened and her breath hitched. She froze in place, not believing what she had heard.

“PAM, I CAN DO THIIIIS!, I CAN DO THIS!!!” Harley use all her force in that words. This is her last chance. She searched between odd looks and people who had started chatting. _Please Pammy…. Please._

The redhead was at the edge of tears and stood in place, shaking. Her lower lip was trembling so much she needed to cover her mouth with her free hand. _She’s here!! She came for me. She Came, she really came..._

She watched how the file advanced, and she was almost on front. Her heart started to beat frenetically and almost hyperventilating. _C’mon Pam, don’t fool yourself. Not again. You already know you’re going to do this anyway…_ She took a shaky breath, as tears flowed down her cheeks. “F-fuck…”

 

Harley’s gaze keep traveling into the crew. Still no sign of her beloved redhead. Her heart started to drop more and more at the possibility. _No. No God, please…_

She felt a grip on her wrist, and turned abruptly to face the person. It was a security policeman. “Miss, please. I need you to get down there” she looked once again, her last hope fell when nobody came at her calling. She obey the officer and lowered to the ground. The security man leaves and she slumped on the chair. She rested her elbows on her kneels, and covered her eyes with her palms. Selina came and crunched in front of her. She doesn't know what to say or how to react with the broken woman. “I’m going to bring you something… okay?” Harley didn’t respond. She let out a deep sight and straighten up, walking to said coffee. She need that woman to get together. Her own emotion was locked in her throat.

 

Harley stood there, trying to get together all the things that had happened today. How she had technically broke her marriage, became friends with a woman she had hate for jealousy since met her, confessed her parents she was in love with a woman...And lost the woman she loves. When she heard the sound of a plane lifting off, tears fell free on ver palms. She didn't know how many time had passed, and she didn’t care. She felt broken. Empty. She had lost the love of her life, for what?... fear. Trying not to hurt people, but she got destroyed in the process.

She heard steps approaching her, and someone sitting beside her. She didn’t even need to turn and see. The smell of hot coffee tells her everything. She felt how the woman pressed the cup lightly on her arm, indicating her to take her. She shocked her head and she retired the cup. After a couple of seconds of silence, Harley spoke.

“I lost her… I lost her for real, Selina. And I don’t even know if she ever come back, and if she does, I don’t think she would want to see me again.” The woman said nothing, so she continued, still without facing her. “I let my fear win… I was so scared of hurting people. Fear makes you do the most stupid things. In fact, fear keeps you to do the best things that would happen on your life…”

“Well, It’s a good thing have not fears, isn’t it?”

... _Wait a minute…_

Her eyes snapped open, and straightened herself, only to meet light tanned skin, red hair and sparkling green eyes, staring warmly at her with a shy smile. Her hands started trembling, the same her lower lip, that failed on keep her mouth closed. “Hi…” was the sound that leaves the gorgeous woman’s lips, on a shaky breath. As the blonde seemed zoned out there, she tried to keep talking, a deep flush on her face and lowering her eyes. “Well… I-I was going to le-” She couldn’t finish her sentence, because cold hands cupped the back of her neck and microseconds later, hungry lips were on her owns.

 

Harley assaulted the woman, kissing her deep and desperately, leaning forward, almost above her. She felt warm hands envelop her waist and pulling her close, as sweet lips kissed her back. She smiled into the kiss, but never broke apart. She sensed the woman trying to pull back but she pulled her into her again. Peppering her mouth, jaw, nose and every inch she could with her kisses. She hear the woman giggle and her Heart soared in joy. She captured her mouth again, with a long and tender kiss. She never want to leave those lips again. They broke apart for oxygen, but their faces keeped close, both smiling and their eyes sparkling. Stealing quick pecks as their breathing become normal again.

Pamela was sure her face will feel sore of how wide she was beaming, but she didn’t care. Her chest can barely contain her humming heart. It wanted to fly out of her, cause it doesn’t belong to her anymore. It belonged to Harley, And if she want it, she’ll wish for nothing on exchange. No gift, no goods, no demonstrations of devotion. Just her heart, as exchange for hers.

“Hi…” Harley breathed getting lost in those lovely peridots were she could wander the rest of her life. “You stayed…” She stated, still not believing this had worked.

“Well… someone yelled at me. You’re a quick learned” pamela purred, seeing those blue eyes widen in surprise and excitement.

“So you heard me?” The excitement in her voice was only compared with a child, whose mother is congrate her for some succes.

“Sweety, the whole airport heard you. I bet even the ones on flight got a hint of it” She giggled and harley’s heart fluttered at the sweet name she gave her. Pamela separated a little, to look properly at the blonde face, her own face full of amusement. “You came… How did you-”

“I left Jay. Well, we left each other. I talk to him about how you and It ended that He already knew it so… we let each other reach our fairy tale.”

“He knew about me?... don’t tell me he knew that-”

“No no, not at all. He didn’t know it was you at first. He only knew that…” She lowered her gaze for a moment and a deep flush covered her cheeks. She looked at the redhead again, who had an arched eyebrow at her. “That I fell completely in love with someone…” She could never erase the image that she is viewing now from her brain. How Pamela’s face relaxed, her eyes opening wide, glazing with new tears, tears of pure joy, and a shy smile formed on those perfect lips. She cupped those lovely cheeks and looked into those eyes that only showed Love and adoration. “I love you Pammy” she used her thumbs to wipe the tears that had bursted free with those words. “I love you so, so much” It was Pamela’s turn to capture those lips in a tender and lovely kiss. She love her, with all her heart. And the best of it?... she love her back.

“I love you too Harl… With all my heart and soul… I love you. I love you” She can´t stop to say it now, and she can’t stop kissing her either. She had spent a whole torturing week without them.

 

Someone cleared her throat. very loud, and both turned to see a smirking Selina, resting on the front wall.They both smiled and standed to approach the woman.

“Not that I tried to ruin the mood but, I bring your package. I don’t think you’ll need it now.”

“The package… right. Deam! I need to call my collages. Tell them that I lost my flight” said the redhead, knowing she had assured them she will be there this night.

“Oh, I don't think that will be a problem.” Both women looked at the black haired, with confused looks. “Seems like for some reason, all flights to Boston had been canceled till next week. Some inversionist that insisted on keep them private. He insisted that something very precious could leave the city to there.” both women looked at each other confused “Seems like you two have some powerful friends”. They smiled in realization. _Bruce…_

“Well, seems like we have some flower shop to fill again” Said the blonde, with a huge smile that occupied all her face and grabbing her arms around the midsection of her beloved one, taking a deep breath of that scent she loved so much. but a scoff from the other woman made her frown.

“Oh c’mon Ivy! You just got your chick, don’t tell me you’re going to spend it with your ass buried on flowers!?” Selina looked at her friend, mentally slapping her if she accept the blonde idea.

“Not exactly. I get it’s pretty uncomfortable. More if they have thorns, right harl?” she teased the blonde in her arms, squeezing her, and smirked at how the blonde’s face reddened furiously and pouted. _GOD this woman will be the death of me._

“Oh no. No, no, no. I don’t want to hear that. I’m gonna be in the car when your love birds will be done.” With that, the perturbed woman turned on her heels and headed to the exit.

 

They smiled at each other, enjoying the closeness, the freedom and the ager of what is going to come next to them… together. They kissed quickly, and Pamela kissed her nose, making the blonde giggle with happiness.

“Come on dear. Let's go home” She said with all the tenderness and cary she could manage, and harley nodded furiously, tightening her grip on the woman.

As they walked, smiling in each other arms, Pamela suddenly stopped, lost in thoughts.

“Whut?, What’s wrong? Harley saw how Pam’s face changed from deep in thought, to amused, to smug. She turned to her and smirked with her perfect eyebrow arched.

“Hey Harl… Do you know what lily means?” Asked the redhead, with sparkling green eyes, that were filled with the sunlight. They were full of happiness, and radiated warm, devotion, care… and love. Harley couldn't help but smile herself. She snaked her arms around the woman's shoulders, as said woman brought her close by the waist. She closed the distance of their faces, lips brushing and purred with her best sweet voice.

“I think we both know that I won that challenge, my love”

 

*THE END*

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AND THIS IS THE END!!.... right?  
> I want to thank you guys so much for the good response this fanfic got. It was reallly really gratefull to write it. I'm thinking about an Epiloge, so please let me know what do you think about it. Probably, i'm going to write it one way or another, but if you insist, I could have it sooner :3
> 
> Again, thank you so much for all your Kudos and Coments. It was my pleasure. Please keep in check for future works. Love you guys! this is all for you! :3
> 
> PDT: Remember the fanarts I mention before? Well, they could get a little to be finished, but I will upload them on the respective chapter, as soon as I finish them :3. You can see a Sneak peak on this chapter. :3
> 
> LOVE YA GUYS!!!


	15. Epilogue

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Those two still have many things to say...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I keep my promises people!  
> Here's the final of this jouney, and I really want to thank you guys for this. It was my first long fanfic, so it was really hard to me to write this, firstly because English is not my native lenguaje and I have a really hard time to correct my grammar mistakes. Second, cause my work is a bitch and I litteraly steal work hours to write each chapter. This one is my favorite, and I think I rewrite it at last 3 times, trying to select my ideas for these two.
> 
> I want to thank those who follow this and coment me constantly. Some of them are AmberZ10, areyoukiddingmedude, EmmaBakos20020226, Sedyin, Zakuro_Hatsune, And so many wonderful writers. They are Genious in what writhing storys refers, and it really means so much to me that they liked this story.  
> THANK YOU SO MUCH GUYS! YOU ROCK!
> 
> Sooooo. That's it. Enjoy this little epilogue :)

Sunlight peered through light green curtains, and illuminated a small and warm bedroom. It was mostly clean, some clothes hanging here and there, but it looked somehow all in place. A small desk and a vanity, adorned with some flowers, with essences that filled the room. It was mostly quiet, only the faith sounds of breathing coming from the large bed were audible. 

Illuminated by the lights of a new day, a woman stirred slightly, as she tried to come back from dream’s world. Her red curls fell loosely on her face but her eyes remained shut. She took a deep breath, filling her lungs and leaving the rest of the sleepiness off her body. She tried to move and let her muscles activate again, but a slight pressure on her chest stopped her from do it. She became aware of something tickling on her nose, something thinny and with the smell of sugar and strawberries. Warm breath colliding lightly with her neck, a weak arm laying across her chest and Cold fingers brushing her collarbone. Her own arm felt numb, so she assumed there was weight there too. She smiled, As much as her still sleepy facial muscles allowed her. 

 

She dared to open her eyes, slowly and wincing as the bright light hurt them at first, but blinking a few times till they adjusted and allowed her to catch the full picture. She was on her room, laying on bed.  _ Our room and bed now, don’t forget it.  _ She was facing the ceiling, but as she lowered her gaze she was greeted by the best dream she could have imagined on her life. Long blonde hair (it really had grown up) sparred over her chest and bed, entangled a little with her red one, covering a half of a face that was resting on her shoulder. Eyes closed, lashes fluttering, pink lips slightly parted and emmaning tiny snores, pale cheeks and pale skin above her light tanned one, radiating a pleasant warm along her naked form and the cold sensation of the sheets that covered both of them. 

_ I Still can’t believe i’m awake already. Maybe someday I’ll get used to this and I’ll stop being this stunned every morning… nah. Nevermind. _

She sighed happily she adjusted her numb arm a little, enveloping it around the woman and started tracing her fingers up and down the spine of her blonde partner, so delicately, trying not to disturb her sleep. The other hand came to sweep some golden trails, revealing a pretty and pacific face. The woman was mesmerized by such beauty, feeling proud and grateful for being able to have this view all to herself everyday.

_ I think I’ll never find anything more beautiful than this…  _ Then those light snores stopped, and she started feeling warm muscles moving above her. Limbs entangled in her own clinged and a pale leg encircled tightly on her hip. The arm that was resting on her chest descended to her side and snaked on her waist. The nose of the woman nuzzled on her chest and took a deep breath. The extremely intimate position can be compared with a Koala or an ivy vine that rise and clung tightly on a tree. Then, like some kind of wish come true, glassy and sleepy sapphires make their appearance, and when they meet emerald, they took the redhead’s breath away.  _ Well, I think I can be wrong... _

 

“Mmmorning Pammy…” mumbled the blonde with groggy voice. She smiled tiredly, and blinked a couple of times to get used to the light on the room. Pamela couldn't help but smile back at her favorite sight every morning.

“Morning Harl” she whispered, her voice a little rough too. She kissed her head affectionately and rested her own against the pillow again.“Sorry, I didn’t mean to wake you” she said has her hands never stopped their jobs. Tracing imaginary circles on Harley’s back and the other resting on the arm that was wrapping her.

“Hmmm… I don’t mind waking up like this” She nuzzled on the woman’s clavelange and leave a sweet peck there, smiling as she closes her eyes, enjoying the pleasant scent of her lover. She heard a chuckle rumble in Pamela’s chest, and she giggled at that. That had become one of her favorite things in her life: Hearing Pamela’s chest. To be more specific: hearing her heartbeat. It was so calm and constant. It makes her relax every inch of her body just to hear it, and loved how it could increase its rate every now and then when they were like this. So close to each other. She had learnt to identify it as one of Pamela’s ways to say ‘I love you’. Just with the beat of her heart.

Pamela sighted and closed her eyes. She keep this for a few seconds, before smiling widely to herself. “Sweetie…?” She called her girlfriend and Harley just hummed, showing she was listening, but without moving from her spot. Pam’s smile turned into a huge grin while reminded her eyes closed. “Happy anniversary”.

 

Harley’s head lifted and focused on the smiling woman beneath her. She beamed. She scooted forward, climbing and tugging the sheets with her until she was facing down at her gorgeous girlfriend, resting her weight on one elbow next to the woman head as her other hand rose to cup her face. Green eyes made appearance and looked on her blues. It was like seeing each other for the first time. Everytime she look at those lovely eyes, she falls over and over again for this woman. “Happy anniversary, my love” She said as she leaned down to kiss her. A long, tender and sweet kiss. This was their three years anniversary of relationship, and Harley could swear everyday, Pam kisses taste better and better.  _ Wow.Three years... _

 

A lot of things had happened in these years, but this… this is exactly as the first day they meet. Well.. not exactly. Sure, there were some issues that were between them those days, like a forbidden love and some marriage troubles, but now, They are all to themselves. After all that drama they fought to face the feeling for each other, things went almost too easy to develop. It took some months for Harley to finally end her Marriage with Jay, even when both parts were more than ready to finish it (you know, laws stuff) but by the time they were legally “free”, Harley had already move with Pam. She wasn’t sure it was the right thing to do just yet, but Jay had encourage her to do it. 

It was weird at first. For both of them to be near Jay. She couldn’t remember how many times Pamela had apologized with him, how she had betrayed his friendship and all, but… He was Jay. He had exposed his feelings to her, as he had done to Harley, and confessed her that he had sensed that connection between them since the beginning. He didn’t know why but it had made him so happy and excited that unconsciously he had tried to push them close. So  _ That why he had been so excited when finding out it was Pam.  _  Now, they all knew for sure that all the time, they were just two best friends playing mariage. 

He is doing well now. He had drop his job on her father’s company, and decided to travel all over the world, meeting different places and cultures, as he always had dreamed too. Harley had never seen him so happy before.

 

The kiss ended, and both women found themselves smiling and eyes shining like the stars. “What do you want us to do? Movie, dinner, park?... Just say the word and you’ll get it” Pam said with lidded  eyes and leaning into Harley’s hand on her face.

“Humm dunno. We already hang out yesterday.” Harley groaned and retire the few trails of redhead from Pam’s face. “Maybe we should just stay here today. I’m really really comfy here, you know?” she adjusted so she was resting on her side now, and her head is on Pam’s pillow too. Pamela giggled and tickled the woman’s sides, making her jolt and wince, before just snake her arm on her waist and pulling the blonde close again, limbs entangled again.

“Oh c’mon, Harl. That was for your birthday. Don’t tell me you don’t want a dinner, with candles, roses all over the place, soft music, just the two of us...” Pam trailed off as she whispered near her face and trailed her fingers along Harley’s sides and hips, making her shiver and feeling the goosebumps it caused on perfect porcelain skin. 

“You know I prefer the lily...and my favorite one is right here already” She pecked the woman lips and a sly smile formed on her own as Pam snorted and rolled her eyes.

“Cheeze” returning the lazy pecks.

“Oh, you know you love it” 

 

Even when she had seen the Capital letter on the middle of Pamela L. Isley name before, she couldn’t help the shock the felt when found out L was for Lillian…  _ Her fucking middle name is Lillian. between all the possibilities… Lillian. Lily…  _ The fact was so hilarious that sometimes she had played saying that's why she love her so much. Truth was, she thought it was some twisted turn of the destiny, that she was made to love her since the beginning and the name was an everyday reminder of her meaning.  _ She dare me to love her, and GOD I’m doing it! _

 

They stayed like this for a couple of minutes more, till their biology tell them the necessity to eat, so they should get out of bed and get dressed, even when their mutual nakedness was so alluring and distracting. They managed to take a shower and change in semi decent clothes. Harley wearing a red hoodie that barely cover her black boyshorts, while Pamela opted for a white tank and baggy green pants. It was still chilly, but they remained as comfy as they can. After all, it was sunday and none of them needed to go work. She had closed the flower shop for this day too.

 

Pam was making breakfast, pancakes with chocolate chips and strawberries, while Harley watered the plants she had on her Lab.  _ “If you put a single foot on that lab, I’m not gonna see ya till next week!”  _ The redhead chuckled remembering her girlfriend words. She knows if she enter on her lab she would be stuck there for “just ten minutes more!” that would become in just God knows how many. Harley would respect her job and dedication, but sometimes, when she considers the redhead had worked enough, she could sneak and drag her out. At first it was difficult, fighting sometimes cause small things like, Harley being too noisy and distracting her or breaking things; Pamela overworking and forgot to met with Harl for lunch, and dinner, and sleep, and breakfast... Arguing about priorities and space. Even after all of that, they always ended in each other arms, apologizing for their mistakes. With time comes practice, and perfection. They had learned a patron and synchrony that most couples never learnt even on years of marriage. Harley would let Pamela work in peace for as long as her project requires, but drag her out when crucial times demanded it, or when she sees her too stressed and grumpy, she could offer her a little ‘stress relief’ with some ‘special massage’ that always ended with both naked on bed, with pleasant smiles on their faces. Of course Pamela won't mind leaving some work for the next day, and pretends she doesn’t know Harley does it on purpose. She cares about her, and Pamela loves how stubborn she could be about taking care of her. 

 

Her thoughts were interrupted when her phone rings, and when the familiar face pop on screen, she took the call and pressed the speaker, still finishing their breakfast. “Hi Kitty, what's up?”

_ “Aggh!  Don’t tell me you’ll start to call me like that too?”  _  a fake irritated Selina asked her friend as an amused smile could be heard. Pam even could swear she was rolling her eyes too.

“Hey, it’s pretty. It’s a payback for ‘Ivy’, don’t you think?” she smirked as she placed the perfect pancakes on a plate and reached for the other ingredients on the counter. 

_ “Meeh, If you said so. I still can’t believe Harley could bring on with the name before you. Took you long enough to figure it out.”  _ Selina laughed loudly, remembering how the blonde had started to call her like that not long before she and Ivy had started dating. She said that she looked and acted exactly like one, and she couldn’t help to think about her like one. In the good way, she said. She wasn’t surprised at all. She loved cats and as her ‘former psychiatrist’ said, she unconsciously act like them. 

“Hey, she’s pretty good with people, you know that. I Still do prefer my babies” Said the redhead as she finished with she and harley’s breakfast and put them on the table, before heading to the fridge for some milk and juice.

_ “Yeah yeah, I know. Speaking of babies… Are you gonna say her now or you’re chicken out again?”  _ Selina said on a teasing tone and hold back a laugh as she hear some glasses clicking on the other side of the line. She could swear ivy had just slipped one and now was blushing furiously and glaring  at the phone. She was totally right.

“Deam… Y-you idiot.” Pam hissed in a lower voice, locking to the sides for any sight of Harley. Nothing. “You know I will soon. Is.. Is just not the right time yet” she whispered close the phone as she bite her lower lip. Her heart beating in anticipation at the thought. 

_ “Ives… you’re saying that for almost a year now!, and I’m not counting all that time that idea had been running in your head. So, you better get the balls soon, or I-” _

“Kitty!” Both women jolted and froze for a second when a high pitched yet familiar voice shouted, announcing her arrive to the room. Pam stood straight just in time to feel pale arms wrapping around her waist and a chin resting on her shoulder, in an attempt of Harley to peer at her phone. 

_ “H-heeey Harls. What’s up?”  _ The trembling on her voice could have betrayed her, but as much as the blonde was good with people, she is still so naive. They are glad for that. 

“Starting a wonderfull day! You know, today is Pammy’s and I anniversary!” Said exited the blonde and squeezed her girlfriend tightly, nuzzling her nose on Pam’s neck, making the redhead shudder for something more that nervousness. 

_ “Oh that’s so good! I’ll leave you then. Bruce and I wanted to make you a visit, but I bet you’ll be a little… busy, so another day will be! Congratulations btw!” _

“Yeah! That would be awesome! Thanks Kitty!” Said the blonde cheerfully feeling how Pam let out a sigh of relief.

“Yeah… Thanks Kitty” she breathed as the call ended and turned her head slightly to look at her girlfriend, who had done the same and now they are facing each other, staring warmly and smiling.

“So… what were you talking about?” Said the blonde as she reached her arms to snake them around the other woman neck, and said woman turned to face her and enveloped her by the waist, keeping her close.

“Uhh… she just wanted us to go dinner some time with Bruce and her. You know, cause your birthday.” She lied, hoping she hadn't heard something about their real conversation. It seemed to work cause the blonde nodded and and muttered and ‘ok’ before pecking her and lead her to the table.

 

The two sat beside the other, across the corner of the table and started eating in comfortable silence, reaching at times their free hands and play with the other’s. Since Pamela is right-handed and Harley uses her left one, they are able to do that without disturb the other. Pam watched a trail of syrup on Harley’s chin, and she naturally used her finger to wipe it, before bring it to her mouth and clean it. Harley smirked at the action and took some syrup on her own finger and poked the corner of Pamela’s mouth with it, and before the redhead had the opportunity to protest, she leaned forward and planted a sloppy kiss there, enough to clean the stain. She giggled and continued with her breakfast as the flushed redhead just rolled her eyes, smiling.

“Ya’noow…” Harley chewed her pancakes, reaching forward and stealing a strawberry from Pam’s plate, earning a narrowed glare from the redhead. “I think I’ll take your word with the park idea. Seems like it’s gonna be good day”. She stands and took her empty plate, as well as pamela’s and take them to the sink to clean them. 

“Good. I suggest to ride there and buy something hot. chocolate, coffee maybe? Seems a little cold outside” Said the woman as she stand and approached her girlfriend, embraceing her from behind and duck her head to nuzzle in the back of her neck. Closing her eyes, she got drunk on the sweet scent of her, smiling at the realization that Harley’s scent is a little different now, cause is melted with another one: Her own scent. The scent of citrus and flowers she possess. Is just a hint, but someone that is so close and used to her smell as her could tell the slight difference.

“Huuum, sounds perfect… we should get ready then...” said the blonde as she closes her eyes and enjoyed the warm and strong presence of her girlfriend. Is intoxicating how her simple existence can enveloped her, almost claiming her to never let her go again.

“Uh-humm…” Pam mumbled against the soft skin of her neck and planted a tender kiss there. And then another… and another until she was trailing to her ear, and descending to the pulse point, where she sucked lightly. She hear Harley’s breath hitched, and she knew her caresses are making the desired effect. The fact is that she can’t control herself. Not near harley. Is like all her senses and good moods flight away through the windows every time she is near her. And in the exact moment when she tasted that creamy skin, she lost it all. 

 

Harley leaned back, trying to be as close as possible of her lover. Her hands placed on top of the ones that are snake on her waist, keeping them in place. She tilted her head slightly to the side, giving her more room to work. Her mind is already clouded with love and lust. Is incredible how simple actions like these can put her on edge so fast. She remember the two of them being locked in Pamela’s room the entire weekend after her encounter in the airport. When they were almost parted apart. They were so engaged to the other that they only left the room for food, but they quickly ended entangled again, missing the warm and scent of the other colliding with their own. They were like wild animals, and not exactly because the intensity of their activities, but for the strong call their bodies and instincts telling them to mate. To be together, almost as if they were already bonded for mother nature with their partner of life. 

_ Partner of life…  _ The idea had been running and running for Harley’s head for a while now. She is more than sure that she want to be with Pamela, like this, forever and ever till her last whisper. And she knows Pamela feels the same. She showed her everyday, every time they are together. She feel it. Right now, every place the redhead’s lips touched on her skin, is a sensitive point that her girlfriend had learned. She had mapped all the those places on Harley’s body that can put her on her knees in seconds. All for her, to make her feel loved and cared. The idea of spending her life beside this woman is like a dream to her, and even when they are already together, living beside the other, there’s something ringing on the back of her mind. Something is missing. There’s something that could make them even closer that they already are. Something that could tell all the world that they belonged to the other, for life.  _ Something… _

 

Pam nipped that sensitive flesh between her neck and collarbone and Haley’s mind gone on Auto pilot. She turned completely on her lover’s arms, not being able to control herself anymore and kissed her completly, deep and passionate, fisting her hands on the maze of red hair, which earned a gasp from her that turned into a deep moan on her throat.  She feel those warm hands descend to her backside and squeeze briefly, pulling her close to her body, so she dug her fingers on the scalp she was massaging. They keep kissing for several moments, till Pam backed a little for air, hearing a groan of protest from the blonde. While she tried to clean her mind, her girlfriend assaulted her neck this time, sucking and nipping at her pulse point, making her almost lose her mind again.  _ Oh oh… I know where this is going... _

“B-babe...” She swallowed and took a deep breath to compose herself “T-the park...” Harley hear her studder and smirked to herself. It makes her self conscious see how she is capable to break this composed and strong woman in a flushed mess. 

“Yeah… It’s not going anywhere soon. I assure you”  Harley mumbled on her neck, and one of her hands descended to her chest, gazing her fingertips for that full breast and already perk niples.  _ Thanks God she’s not wearing bra.  _ Pamela’s breath hitched and her hands twitched instinctively, squeezing gently the other woman’s butt. 

“I-I know, but… it’s late and… and w-we need to get ready… and the people…” her voice was just a whisper at this point and breathed between them. She is losing the battle. She knows it. There’s no way she could resist this woman, but she is willing to try it at last.

Harley stopped her work and looked up the flushed woman. She reached her leg slightly, resting it almost on the woman hip, allowing the other woman’s thigh to press between hers, pressing forward and with lidded eyes, parted lips and her best sultry voice she said “And your point is…?” Sh accentuated the question with a firm grind of her hip, feeling how the woman tensed and bitted her lower lip, maybe to suppress the loud moan that would produce. She saw Pamela’s green eyes darken and dug inside her soul.

Pamela just stared at those hungry eyes and focused on the wet and pulsing sensation against her thigh.  _ Aaaaand I lost it.  _  “Oh, nevermind”. She took the back of Harley’s tights and lifted her, making her squeal and lock her legs on her hips, on a grip for dear life. The woman giggled and rested their foreheads together.

“That’s my girl” she stared in those darkened peridots, feeling how they had started to move from the kitchen, maybe to another room but she didn’t care enough to break the wild stare on her.

“Here I am” Pamela used that husky voice on her, before using her foot to close the bedroom door.

_______

 

Pamela feel anxious. She was waiting on the end of the stairs for Harley and head of to the park, but she was still getting the ‘final touch’ on her outfit. She didn't mind waiting, but her mind was racing and her heart get a leap each time she played with the little box inside the pocket of her coat. She was nervous, and pretty sure she is all sweaty too. 

_ Alright Pam, get it together. You have been waiting for a long time for this. You have predicted and consider every possible scenario to say this, and this looks the better time… like had seems the other ones… for at last a year know.  _ She sighed and tried to calm her heartbeat. Truth was she had think about this for what it seems forever (well, since Harley came on her life), but she had never thought she would be the one proposing this. Her life is busy,  she needs to travel every now and then, and cherish concepts like ‘private time’ and ‘own space’. But there’s something about Harley that makes her want to do this. Makes her want to be a better person, be there for her, care her, protect her, love her, make her feel the most cherished and loved woman in the world. This is a huge steep. Abysmal, and with the blonde’s record she is scared that she could think this step would not be the best decision. 

_ You’re afraid she rejects you. You’re afraid she won’t like to have this with you. You’re afraid that some day, she’ll just disappear… don’t be silly. She loves you. You know it. She will never ever leave you. She’s the most wonderful person you ever met and she loves you! She wants to be with you… so, being with me is part of this, right? Is just making it totally official. When you want to be with someone is for real, right? Dark side as well as the bright. Forever ever after. Till the last day of existence in this planet… what if she doesn’t likes my darkness? What if I disappoint her? What if… _

Her inner traumas were interrupted when her girlfriend shut the door closed and put her keys on her purse, descending the stairs and meet her down.

“Well, are you ready?” Said Harley once she reached her zoned out girlfriend and linked her arm with hers, looking at her expectantly. Pam just blinked a couple of times and gripped tightly the little box.

“Y-yeah. C’mon, is getting late” she smiled and the two leaved the apartment.

 

Once at the park, Harley was seated on the bench, looking at the lake. She was bracing herself cause is a little cold, but the chilly wind got nothing against the warm that radiated her heart. This last three years had been the happiest of her life. She still could remember how she had been, right here a few years ago with her heart totally broken, but know… it’s mended and so full of joy. Everyday, she falls more and more for Pamela. She never even thinked it could be possible to love somebody the way she does. It scared her, sometimes. But mostly, it gives her straight. She had become a stronger woman.She had let go of her fears and restrictions, and allowed herself to sank in the deepest parts of Pamela’s Love. She didn’t even need to worry if the next step she could take would be safe or not, because even in the darkness, when there’s poison in her head, she knows Pam would lead her through all of this, and that’s all that matters.

She was so deep on her thought that didn’t felt the redhead approach her, and jolted a little when she placed a hot cup against her cheek. Is note that hot, and she would never let her burn, but she caught her guard down. Pamela Giggled at the reaction and settled beside her girlfriend. “Haha, sorry. There were many people there.” She sat comfy and when she feelt Harley shiver, she put an arm around her shoulders, action that the blonde took advantage and retracted her legs, put them on the bench and snugged against her. Pam let out a sigh and rested her head atop Harley’s. 

They stayed like that, for who knows how many time, seeing people playing, the cold breeze against her faces, and enjoying the presence of the other. They had finished their drinks and had their free hands linked, occasionally playing with their fingers and freckles there. It was Pam who broke the comfortable silence first. 

“Thank you…” She said in and sight, eyes locked on the beautiful environment they were surrounded. 

“Humm?... what for?” Harl mumbled  against her lover’s shoulder. She placed a quick peck there, and tilted her head to face her. She was deep in thought, but her expression has peaceful. 

“For have gone and stopped me on the airport” She took harley’s hand and bring her to her mouth to kiss her while keep talking..”For didn't give up… for fight for us… for love me” Pam turned to her, with an unreadable expression. Her gaze was warm, her green eyes were sparkling and a sweet smile was placed on her full lips. “Thank you, my love” She kissed her sweetly on the lips. Slow and lovely. They had kissed plenty of times this way before, but somehow, this one was different. This feel pure, special, those that you only receive once in a lifetime. They parted, and Harley cupped her lover check, drinking in her features and smiling to herself.

“You don't need to say that. That’s something I would have done one way or another. You’re everything to me Pammy. I should be the one that is grateful for everything you’ve done to me.” She smiled and rested her head on Pamela’s neck, nuzzling it, while her girlfriend enveloped her into her loving arms. “If I have never meet you… I wouldn’t have known what is like being this close to someone, really close. To being part of someone's life and let someone be part of yours. To belong to someone, on mind, body, heart and soul. Because That’s what it's like for me. I’m completely yours, and that’s the best feeling on the world. I thought I known what love was, but that wasn’t true. Now I’ve seen it, and I assure you: You can search in any inch of the universe, and never find anything more beautiful” Pamela was at the verge of tears, but she felt as Harley still had so much to say so she tightened her grip and let her continue. Harley took a deep breath and griped Pamela’s coat tightly. “So, yeah. I know that Love is unconditional… but I also know it could be… Unpredictable...unexpected, uncontrollable, unbarable…. And…” Harley’s voice was broken known, but she forced herself to continue with this. This moment is so important, she need to let it go.. “And, when I see you, like this, with me. When you woke up in the morning and nuzzled your pillow, when you water your plants and talk to them so sweet, when you dance making breakfast thinking noone is watching you, when you’re stressed in your laboratory and make this funny gesture with your nose… I just know I love you. That my heart feels like… like my chest can… barely contain it. Like you said once: It doesn’t belong to me anymore. Belongs to you. Forever ever after. And there’s nothing i’m more grateful that this. That you have my heart, and I have yours”

 

Pamela’s chest was convulsing with how hard she was sobbing. Everything she could have wished Harley would feel, she does. She really does.Every word she used was perfect, and matched exactly what she feels about her. She doesn’t know what she had done to deserve such amazing woman, to deserve being loved like this, but she is so grateful it had happened to her. Her ever were closed tightly, letting her emotions flew free. She felt harley shift her position, backing away from her embrace to sit properly, but she kept her eyes closed. 

 

“Pammy… look at me, please.” her voice was sweet and Pam could tell she was crying too. It took her a couple of seconds to compose herself again, and then she opened her eyes and raised her gaze to her girlfriend, only to find her staring at her, eyes digging in hers and… and…  _ Is she on the ground? Why is she…  _ And then her eyes descended to Harley’s hands and frozen on the little box on them.  _ W-wait…Oh my God...OH MY GOD, is she really….  _ Her eyes open wide and got in shock when Harley opened said box.

 

“I fall in love with you every single day, and i don’t know what can I do for you but...  if you let me, I’ll swear I’ll be at your side, loving you inside out, till the last whisper of my existence. Pamela Lillian Isley, Will… Will you marry me?” harley’s face was totally flushed, but her gaze was intense and determined, never breaking eye contact with those shocked peridots.

 

Pamela didn’t move a muscle for well an entire minute. And for Harley that was and eternity of torture. And then… She laughs… She. fucking. laughs. Pamela busted into a maniac laugh, so powerful she needed to clench her stomach and bented to the front in an attempt to stop it, but it didn’t work. Tears were falling on the corner of her eyes, and her breath was leaving her lugs. 

 

Harley was shocked, still not knowing exactly how to feel about this. She felt confused, upset, nervous, angry, concerned… and the more the woman laughs she was more and more clear what she feels.  _ Yeaph. It’s angry. _

 

She stood up, hands on hips and tapping furiously her foot on the ground. “ARE YOU SERIOUS??!!!, What the fuck Pamela!, What do you think y-” her anger stopped when full lips collided with hers and she found being enveloped in a tight hug and spinning in the air. It was a full force kiss, and she felt dizzy, regardless the spinning action.

“YES!. Yes, yes, yes, yes,YESSSSS!!!” Said the beaming redhead as she peppered her face with kisses. “Yes…” She breathed and rested her forehead against hers, and bot woman looked each other, smiling and tears rolling down their cheeks.

“Jesus...YOU SCARED THE HELL OF ME!” Harley felt relieved and as pamela lowered on the ground again she cupped  her face again, still not believing what had happened.  _ She said yes… she said yes… SHE FUCKING SAID YES!!! _

“You silly monkey. I LOVE YOU! Of course I want to marry you!, but only with one condition…”  Harley perked up and nodded furiously, ager to know the condition to have this woman as her wife.  _ HOLY SHIT, MY WIFE! _

Pamela giggled and put her hand on the pocket of her coat, getting out the box that was destined to use to propose her. She opened it and Harley’s eyes almost pop out of her skull. “Only if you say yes too”. With that harley threw her head back, laughing maniacally, feeling completely matched with Pamela’s previous reaction.

“Hell Yeah!, a thousand times, YES!” She Kissed her fiance deeply. This was the most cherished moment on her life, and is perfect. TOTALLY PERFECT. The couple exchanged giggles, and put their respective rings. Smiling and wetting lost on them, pictureing their interlaced hands with them. 

“Oh, I forgot. There’s one more thing” Said the blonde and Pamela arched an Eyebrow at her. 

“What? You have the reception already?” 

“Oh no, I leave it on the couch!” She mocked searching on her pockets and giggled as Pam slapped her arm. She took the back of Pamela’s neck and bring her close to her face, staring at her eye.  “I warn you... On the wedding, don’t you dare to look anyone but me.”

Pamela laughed and bring her fiance closer to her body. “Believe me, my love. You’re got me so bad I’ll never tear my eyes off you”

  
  


_ “Everyone promises you happily ever after... but life turns into a different kind of fairy tale.” _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you guys!
> 
> I want to know : Do you know which movie I took diloges on Harley's declaration?. ;)
> 
> PDT: I used harley's Furious tic from Amberz10 fanfics. I needed to :P

**Author's Note:**

> Hi there. I am starting to writhe this fanfic inspired by the movie “Imagine me & you” that I watched a few days ago. The characters are not of my own. They are propriety of DC comics and some of them are not like the original character was.
> 
> Hope you liked it, and I will be waiting for comments. Please, ignore my grammar. English is not my native language :P


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